Spoofs of spy films have been around for a while, and a lot of them are hits But what about the weird, wacky, unfunny misses? This time we've got a 60's spy heroine who's been hired to secure some diamonds. But will she deliver? Join Tom and Ryan as they discuss impromptu musicals, convoluted plots, and at the difficulties of writing comedy. It's our review of Modesty Blaise!

Time stamps:

0:03:50 - Background

0:34:50 - Summary

0:45:10 - Notable Scenes

0:50:55 - The Good

0:55:05 - The Bad

1:12:00 - The Ugly

1:17:20 - Final Thoughts

1:19:30 - A Special Programming Note

We're back to familiar territory as we review a 70's British horror flick. A reclusive artist hosts some young people at his remote estate. But will they survive the stay? Join Tom and Ryan as they talk about magical robes, bronze casts, and discount Christopher Lees. It's our review of Crucible of Terror!

Time stamps:

0:03:00 - Background

0:17:15 - Summary

0:38:00 - Notable Scenes

0:43:30 - The Good

0:47:40 - The Bad

1:01:50 - The Ugly

1:05:30 - Final Thoughts

From time to time, we here at School of Schlock like to tackle the lesser-known films of classic filmmakers. And other times we watch films made by James Franco. Guess which one we're doing today! In a post-apocalyptic world, can a son find a cure for his mother's disease? Can a robot find love? Join Tom and Ryan as we discuss drug lords, barn-frame towns, and dead oceans. It's our review of Future World!

Time stamps:

0:02:50 - Background

0:28:40 - Summary

0:41:05 - Notable Scenes

0:48:00 - The Good

0:51:20 - The Bad

1:12:30 - The Ugly

1:15:40 - Final Thoughts

It's time for a dose of classic schlock in the form of a 50's monster movie. How are a series of murders linked to a carnival hypnotist and a monster that seemingly died out millions of year ago? Join Tom and Ryan as they talk about unscrupulous rich dads, soul transmigration, and lobsters with boobs. It's our review of The She-Creature!

Time stamps:

0:02:25 - Background

0:22:15 - Summary

0:37:30 - Notable Scenes

0:46:55 - The Good

0:54:25 - The Bad

1:06:20 - The Ugly

1:10:05 - Final Thoughts

We don't often get to review award-baiting, well-shot historical dramas on this show, but when we do we make sure they contain at least 50% Nicholas Cage. This time an Italian officer falls in love with a young woman on a Greek island in the middle of World War 2. But will the war tear them, or at least parts of them, apart? Join Tom and Ryan as they talk beautiful cinematography, less beautiful accents, and the difficulties of adapting novels to the screen. It's our review of Captain Corelli's Mandolin!

Time stamps:

0:04:15 - Background

0:26:00 - Summary

0:41:25 - Notable Scenes

0:47:20 - The Good

0:54:30 - The Bad

1:08:45 - The Ugly

1:17:40 - Final Thoughts

It isn't every day that you encounter a spaghetti-western martial arts action adventure comedy...but when you do, make sure it isn't this one! Can a kung-fu warrior and a snake-oil salesman save a town from an evil businessman? Join Tom and Ryan as they talk loose fighting styles, tonics and tinctures, and one of the most controversial actors they have yet encountered! It's our review of The Return of Shanghai Joe!

Time stamps:

0:04:10 - Background

0:19:00 - Summary

0:29:30 - Notable Scenes

0:34:50 - The Good

0:38:05 - The Bad

0:47:15 - The Ugly

0:52:00 - Final Thoughts

Cheap 80's fantasy is eating good with this cult classic sword-and-board adventure! Can a prophesied warrior save a kingdom from an evil tyrant and a demonic spellcaster? Join Tom and Ryan as they discuss bloody sarcophagi, projectile sword blades, and poorly done crucifixion! It's our review of The Sword and the Sorcerer!

Time stamps:

0:03:30 - Background

0:21:45 - Summary

0:42:45 - Notable Scenes

0:47:30 - The Good

0:51:10 - The Bad

1:05:30 - The Ugly

1:10:45 - Final Thoughts

2025 has come and gone like the wind. But did anything fill our sails? Which characters were airheads? Which movie moment blew us away, versus ones that simply blew? And will we be awarding anything to Charles Dance? Find out in the 2025 Schlocky Awards!

Time Stamps:

0:02:15 - Explanation, Film List, and Lifetime Achievement Award
0:09:45 - Worst Character
0:48:30 - Worst Moment or Line
1:33:35 - Worst Visual
1:42:30 - Best Moment
1:56:05 - The 10 Worst Films of the Year