Outofshapeworthlessloser

A Memoir of Figure Skating, F*cking Up, and Figuring It Out

By: Gracie Gold

Narrated by: Gracie Gold

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A “piercing account” (The Wall Street Journal) of surviving as a young woman in a society that rewards appearances more than anything and demands perfection at all costs—especially if you’re an Olympic figure skater.

“A riveting memoir, which details her experience with an eating disorder, depression and her high-stakes career.”—People

When Gracie Gold stepped onto center stage (or ice, rather) as America’s sweetheart at the 2014 Sochi Olympics, she instantly became the face of America’s most beloved winter sport. Beautiful, blonde, Midwestern, and media-trained, she was suddenly being written up everywhere from The New Yorker to Teen Vogue to People and baking cookies with Taylor Swift.

But little did the public know what Gold was facing when the cameras were off, driven by the self-destructive voice inside that she calls “outofshapeworthlessloser.” In 2017, she entered treatment for what was publicly announced as an eating disorder and anxiety treatment but was, in reality, suicidal ideation. While Gold’s public star was rising, her private life was falling apart: Cracks within her family were widening, her bulimia was getting worse, and she became a survivor of sexual assault. The pressure of training for years with demanding coaches and growing up in a household that accepted nothing less than gold had finally taken its toll.

Now Gold reveals the exclusive and harrowing story of her struggles in and out of the pressure-packed world of elite figure skating: the battles with her family, her coaches, the powers-that-be at her federation, and her deteriorating mental health.

Outofshapeworthlessloser is not only a forceful reckoning from a world-class athlete but also an intimate memoir, told with unflinching honesty and stirring defiance.

Critic reviews

“Stunningly candid . . . The depth and breadth of the problems Gold reveals in the memoir stunned me. And the way she has been putting her life back together continues to impress.”—Phil Hersh

Real, Raw, Honest, and Beautiful

The title of my review should speak for itself. Thank you Grace for the opportunity to get to know you and your beautiful journey in this world.

Raw honesty

Really no words to describe the gift that GG has given the world. Thank you ❤️

Favorite Memoir I’ve read!

I’m so proud of Gracie Gold for telling the world her story. I love and appreciate her so much more now. This is an amazing and honest memoir that fans of skating and beyond would benefit greatly from and enjoy.

It was real, honest and raw

It was so good I shared with my daughters. They were figure skaters as well.

Powerful voice of truth

This is a very inspiring story, full of wisdom and told beautifully by Gracie herself. What a gift!