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On Her Knees  By  cover art

On Her Knees

By: Brenda Marie Davies
Narrated by: Brenda Marie Davies
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Publisher's Summary

"The problem was, because purity is an idol (a validated and worshiped idol), I didn’t know who or what I’d be without my totem. My Christianity depended on purity.” 

Going to a conservative Christian church when she was young, Brenda Marie Davies heard a consistent message - save yourself for marriage - that instilled in her fear and shame about sex. But after moving to Los Angeles at 19 and finding herself suddenly exposed to a world far outside her comfort zone, she was forced to wrestle with the power and perversity of Christian purity culture. 

On Her Knees chronicles Brenda’s spiritual journey over the course of a decade in LA through marriage, divorce, unlikely friendship, and sexual exploration. Through it all, she began tearing down the false idol of purity while refusing to abandon her faith. Told with raw honesty, sans obligatory shame, this is a story for anyone who wonders if it’s possible to love God without fearing sex, in all its shades of grey.

©2021 Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing Co. (P)2021 Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing Co.

What listeners say about On Her Knees

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This book is PHENOMENAL

This book is amazing. A must listen for anyone who grew up in purity culture specifically! This book really takes you through the harm purity culture causes. Brenda is raw and real about her life and I know her openness about her personal experiences will help so many people. There are tons of people out there feeling alone in their “deconstruction” journey and it’s so important have books like this in existence! I hope this is just the beginning of her writing! If you haven’t, you should also check out her podcast and YouTube channel- God is Grey.

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Captivating & Beautiful

I felt like I was at a sleepover with Brenda as she eloquently shared her stories and wisdom. I think we all see pieces of ourselves in these intimate tales. Listening to this book was an honour.

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Relatable

I was raised in a sex-positive household while my partner grew up in purity culture. This book put a lot of my secondhand experiences/shame into words. I'm so glad that there are more Christian authors sharing the experience of inviting the divine into all aspects of life, sex included.

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I didn’t know how much I needed this!

This book was so open and honest! I didn’t know that I needed to hear this message as much as I did. I l connected in so many ways to the message- I could literally feel it.

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I need more!

Brendaaaa 😭 thank you for sharing this story with us.

Why did it end?! We need so much more please! Thank you for sharing all the scary parts. I’m proud to be in your GIG community. Can you please write another book like..ASAP?!

Xo

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Vulnerable truth

Brenda writes from the most honest perspective, calling us all to a higher level of integrity — sexually and spiritually. My heart is exploding. You are never alone, and Brenda’s journey validates the fears all deconstructing Christians have.

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Keeping it real

I so appreciate brenda’s story. She could have shied away from the darkest parts but she shares it all. I felt a sense of freedom as I read like, oh it’s not just me? The schism that develops when we are unable to accept and forgive all the parts of ourselves.. she speaks to that and I cannot thank her enough for her candor and openness and the grace which she offers herself, lets others know there is grace for them too. That maybe, just maybe, we’ve been sold a bill of goods with this purity stuff. And maybe just maybe, it’s patriarchal bullshit. Yeah, in fact, f*ck purity culture!

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Thank you Brenda!

Absolutely amazing. Just finished this book and I am speechless. All I can say is that you must read it for yourself!

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Vulnerable, Raw, & Captivating

Brenda does an amazing job at telling her story about the ups and downs of her spiritual journey. Her story certainly commands your attention and ends on an encouraging note.

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Made me feel like I'm not alone.

Brenda is vulnerable and honest in a way that is so refreshing and relatable. She said so many things out loud that I was afraid to admit I was even thinking. This book is a great expression of why love and relationships and faith is about more than checking boxes or following rules.

1 person found this helpful

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  • Anonymous User
  • 09-19-21

A powerful read

Brenda is such an incredible storyteller, and her writing really gets you. This book made me angry, happy and teary eyed, I felt everything listening to this audiobook and I can’t recommend it enough. It’s such a personal and important book, and I’m so glad she got to tell her story and spread her love and kindness with readers.

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  • sammieseagull
  • 05-05-21

Glamorises sin

The swearing is constant, glamorising everything unbiblical. Brenda seems a nice lady but this book revels in sex parties, curse words and crude living.

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  • Isi Adeola
  • 05-03-21

Poignant, Harrowing & Beautiful

I absolutely loved this! Brenda’s refreshingly honest journey from evangelical purity culture to sexual integrity was beautiful to listen to. Would definitely recommend!

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  • Isaac Webb
  • 04-28-21

Must read!

An absolutely wonderful book full of honesty, love, pain, joy and reconciliation to oneself. This book is a must read for anyone raised within Purity Culture, and for anyone who is currently perpetuating the harmful ideologies that Brenda so beautifully unpacks in this memoir.

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 04-25-21

Beautiful and honest.

Brenda is a very good writer and an engaging narrator. she weaves her intimate story into
a beautiful cautionary tale about purity culture.
I know this will make a difference for young people in and out of Christian evangelical circles.