My Grandmother's Hands

Racialized Trauma and the Pathway to Mending Our Hearts and Bodies

By: Resmaa Menakem MSW LICSW SEP

Narrated by: Cary Hite

Length: 10 hrs and 18 mins

Publisher's summary

A National Best Seller

"My Grandmother's Hands will change the direction of the movement for racial justice." (Robin DiAngelo, New York Times best-selling author of White Fragility)

In this groundbreaking book, therapist Resmaa Menakem examines the damage caused by racism in America from the perspective of trauma and body-centered psychology.

The body is where our instincts reside and where we fight, flee, or freeze, and it endures the trauma inflicted by the ills that plague society. Menakem argues this destruction will continue until Americans learn to heal the generational anguish of white supremacy, which is deeply embedded in all our bodies. Our collective agony doesn't just affect African Americans. White Americans suffer their own secondary trauma as well. So do blue Americans - our police.

My Grandmother's Hands is a call to action for all of us to recognize that racism is not only about the head but about the body, and introduces an alternative view of what we can do to grow beyond our entrenched racialized divide.

Paves the way for a new body-centered understanding of white supremacy - how it is literally in our blood and our nervous system.

Offers a step-by-step healing process based on the latest neuroscience and somatic healing methods, in addition to incisive social commentary.

©2018 Central Recovery Press (P)2018 Central Recovery Press

Think You Don't Need This? Think Again, Please!

A group of us (mostly white people) from our Quaker Meeting (Church) decided to pursue our troubled feelings about race through a Zoom Book Club, and "My Grandmother's Hands" was our first selection.

I had doubts - I'm not a real new-age, "touchy-feely", self-help kind of person. After reading the first few chapters and having our first gathering, however, I am truly a believer. There are lots of uncomfortable things in this book, and there are sections and even chapters that you may question scientifically and practically. There can be, however, no denying that experiencing this book and its self-reflections and exercises with an open mind is a very powerful emotional journey.

Doing it as a group has been particularly meaningful - sharing questions, different personal experiences and responses has been enlightening and very beneficial to, I believe, all of us involved.

Whether you read it alone or can share the experience as a family or a discussion group, prepare yourself for some reactions you may not have expected. Whatever your race or age or ethnicity, there will be difficult moments and personal discoveries.

This is not based entirely on the point of view of any one race, although the author is an African American Psychologist. He explains, of course, the everyday experience of being Black in America, and that is painful for all races to contemplate, but the book is nonjudgmental. He offers perspectives and exercises for three basic groups: Blacks, Whites, and what he terms Blues (police) with balance and compassion.

Each of us is a product of our history (and its collective and personal trauma), culture, experience, physical environment; often we think and act in ways so elemental as to be automatic and unconscious. This book helps us be aware of those biases and suggests ways to slow down and think of new ways of responding to what are often unthinking physical and mental reactions.

Read (or listen to) this book - or even better, do both at the same time. Genuinely put your body and mind into the experience. Do the exercises. I (and the group of which I am a part) have benefited greatly. I think you will too! I wish everyone could and would read and discuss "My Grandmother's Hands"!

Helped me in my journey of healing my trauma

This book has been more than I expected... It took me a few weeks to read because it was so triggering. I've been working on my mental health for a while now and this book has given me a better understanding and Clarity that im on the right track. I've always feel like I held a LOT of trauma in my body but I just didn't really have a name for. This is a book that everyone should read. Anyone that feels lost and stuck and grave a sense to belong a sense to understanding. I m not lucky enough to have a grandmother or even a mother to feed energy off of. But Iam a person that ALWAYS knew I was special/ blessed. This book will be something I will reread over and over again.. Im very happy I came across this thanks to someone I follow on IG ( acehood wife) forget her IG name but anyways get this book. I brought the hard copy and the audible version. ❤

Must Read for Healing Racialized Trauma

Listening to My Grandmother’s Hands as a white reader has transformed my understanding of racial justice and whiteness. It is a workbook and a therapeutic, challenging read. 11/10 recommend.

Truth claims similar to orthodox religion: deny and be criticized

While the book has many good ideas from mindfulness and trauma informed approaches, Resmaa approaches the topic of race a lot like orthodox religion takes on faith. If you don’t believe the religious truth claim, then be more faithful and pray harder. For Resmaa, if you don’t believe his many truth claims about the human condition then it is sure evidence of white fragility or a ‘dodge.’ Statistics and challenges to any of his arguments are set up simply as white supremacy, rather than logical fallacies. He leaves little room for discussion that could involve multiple view points, scientific inquiry, or the possibility that he is wrong - violating a key pillar of scientific thought.

While he occasionally uses conditional language, he falls solidly in a ‘modern’ voice where he claims to know exactly what all white people think and what they should do to ‘grow up.’ Ruth Dean’s approach to cultural humility versus the myth of cultural competence seems far more aligned with truth about engaging others.

While I took away many good points and gained many insights, the overall message seems to further the in-group / out-group mentality that continues to work against deepening dialogue about present and past racial tensions.

Heavy on rhetoric and nearly absent on science,
Resmaa is quick to dispense non-nuanced advice (even commands) on many, many topics (which yoga is best, how police officers should do community policing, the amount of sleep that is needed, what white people should think and say, that you should read his book over and over. Etc.). Failing to take such advice, both indicates you are supporting white supremacy and are fragile - setting up fear that improvement is impossible.

If the goal is to keep come together within and across races (he argues that this is not currently happening or even possible at several junctures), this book is both a step forward and divisive. Yes, mindfulness should help us all slow down and be more intentional. Healing is necessary and will likely require understanding historical and modern insults to justice.

Must read for all!

This is a great way to address the problem of racism! Dealing with trauma that has been inflicted on all parties and culture involved including White Bodies, Black Bodies and Police Bodies! This is a great tool for training as well, it should be included in any leadership program including Police academy!

Good exercises, but a bit disappointing

While the science supports treating inherited trauma, there was an overall town of police apologizing and in light of recent events in Minneapolis, this text did not age well. Also, as a text with a focus on race and racism I was a bit put off by the terms red and yellow bodies.

Brilliant, maybe even life-changing

This fascinating challenging book gave me so many resources to see more clearly, to work with my own trauma and to be supportive as others work through theirs. It’s a lens that offers a profound opportunity for healing.

Best book on racial equity I’ve read

This is the most helpful book I’ve read on race in 2020-2021. Practical tools and a call to action with something that everyone can do. Highly recommended!

An excellent step forward

I can't think of many people this book wouldn't be deeply helpful to. If you want a body-mindful therapy book that dives into the US's greatest trauma, white supremacy, this is surely it. The traumatic stress reduction exercises and practices are enough for me to highly recommend it. The narration is excellent too.

Life changing...

I have been given hope and tools to change the deeply held trauma in America. This work must be read by all who care about the future of our country and our world.