http://www.sherylkline.com/blog

Have you ever walked into a meeting prepared, thoughtful, ready to contribute ... and then left feeling dismissed?

Maybe you were spoken over.
Maybe your idea got brushed past.
Maybe you watched the conversation move on like you never opened your mouth.

It is incredibly frustrating.

And, I want you to hear this clearly:

Your voice matters. It matters more now than ever.
And you deserve to be heard, valued, and respected in the rooms you are in.

The good news is this does not have to keep happening. There is a proven process to reduce those moments and increase your influence without needing to become louder, sharper, or someone you are not.

Here are two strategies you can start using immediately.

1) Walk in Clear on Your Message ... and the Meaning Behind It

Before we talk tactics, we have to talk about mindset. Not in a vague motivational way ... in a practical, performance based way.

I want to share a simple parable that makes this point.

There are three people laying bricks.

Someone walks up to the first and asks, “What are you doing?”
She says, “I’m laying bricks.”

They ask the second person the same question.
She says, “I’m building a church.”

Then they ask the third.
She says, “I’m building direct communication with God.”

This is not a religious statement. It’s a meaning statement.

Same work. Same bricks. Same room.

Different perceived purpose. Different power.

And when you are going into a room where you might be dismissed ... it is critical to decide ahead of time what your message means.

Are you walking in thinking, “This is just one more update”?

Or are you walking in knowing, “This point protects the team, improves the outcome, reduces risk, saves time, increases performance”?

Because when you assign real meaning to your message, you show up differently.

You speak with more certainty.
You take up appropriate space.
You stay grounded when tension shows up.

So before your next meeting, get clear on three things:

What exactly do I need to say?
Why does it matter to the team, the leader, or the business?
What will be lost if I do not express it?

When you do this, you’re not just “sharing an idea.” You’re advancing something that matters.

2) Use a Simple Interruption Script That Protects the Relationship and Reclaims the Floor

Now let’s talk about what happens when you get interrupted.

This is common, especially for women. And research also shows it can happen even more for women who are further marginalized within our gender.

When it happens, it makes sense that you would feel frustrated or angry. That reaction is human.

The problem is ... when emotions go up, performance goes down.

And when your performance drops, your voice and impact shrink in the very moment you need them most.

So here’s a strategy that helps you interrupt the interruption ... while staying composed.

It comes from Chris Voss and it’s called an accusations audit.

The concept is simple: you say out loud what you think the other person might be thinking about you in that moment. When you name it, it often releases its power.

Read the rest at: https://www.sherylkline.com/blog/feeling-dismissed-by-peers-or-leadership

If you have questions, or if I can support you or your team in any way, reach out. I’m cheering you on always! http://www.sherylkline.com/meeting
- Sheryl

http://www.sherylkline.com/blog

My young memories of the holidays were a little tricky and not always as joyous as I imagined they were for everyone else.

If that’s you during this holiday season, I’m sending big hugs and deep gratitude for being a part of the Fearless Female Leadership family.

If you’re relaxing and enjoying family and friends, I’m also sending the same to you, and I truly believe that time is the absolute best gift of all!

Without you, there would be no Fearless Female Leadership community. As we approach 10 years of this work (speaking from stages, coaching incredible female executives and their teams, and now leading peer advisory masterminds) I’m in awe of the compounded impact that you all have had!

Thank you for showing up.

Thank you for speaking up.

Thank you for leading with courage, heart, and impact… often in rooms that ask more of you than they should.

I also want to share a few milestones I’m celebrating with The Zone Lab. We’ve formed new partnerships with Women in Securitization, Women in Product, and we renewed our partnership with Athena Alliance. All are organizations deeply aligned with advancing women in leadership.

One highlight I’m especially excited about: I’ll be leading a Rising Stars peer advisory cohort with Women in Securitization. It’s a powerhouse group of 12 high-potential female leaders on the fast track to executive roles. We’ll be working together in a hybrid format… meeting in person at their conference in February, gathering virtually throughout the year, and culminating with an in-person mastermind celebration in New York City next December. I couldn’t be more energized by this work.

On a personal note, there have been some meaningful moments at home too. My son Dan just turned 30 (which feels impossible), and I couldn’t be prouder of him (or of his siblings, Ryan and Megan.) My husband Scott also had a big birthday (I’ll just say it’s double Dan’s 😉).

And while my heart is a little heavy, my daughter Megan is moving from San Diego back to San Francisco. Sad for me, exciting for her, and I know she’s where she’s meant to be. As of this writing, she’s deep in final rounds of interviews for Salesforce, Baseten, and a couple others. Fingers crossed!

As we head into the holidays, please know this: I am deeply grateful for you and for the leadership you bring into the world.

Wishing you and your family health, happiness, and joy this season.

Happiest Holidays and cheering you on always,
- Sheryl

http://www.sherylkline.com/blog

Have you ever felt like a peer was quietly (or not so quietly) blocking your influence with leadership?

If so, you’re definitely not alone. And when it happens, it’s not just frustrating… it’s costly. Costly to your confidence, your credibility, your career momentum, and the business itself.

What makes it even harder is that this behavior is often driven by fear-based leadership or narcissistic tendencies. When someone feels threatened, they may try to limit your visibility, exclude you from conversations, or position themselves as the gatekeeper to leadership.

It is not a reflection of your capability or value.

Why This Matters So Much

When a peer blocks your access to leadership:

• Your ideas don’t get heard
• Your impact gets diluted
• Key relationships don’t form
• The organization loses out on your expertise

The good news is there’s a proven process to address it.

Imagine for a moment if that same peer became someone who supported your ideas, amplified your voice, and saw your presence as a win for them (not a threat.)

That shift is possible.

Here’s How:

1. Develop Strategic Empathy (Your Mental Preparation)

Before engaging with a difficult peer, most people are already frustrated—and understandably so. But going into a conversation with that emotional charge puts you behind the starting line. Why? Because those emotions will likely come out in your tone, body language, and gestures.

Instead, I recommend developing what I call strategic empathy, rooted in an ECO Mindset:

• “E”mpathy – What pressures are they under? What might they be afraid of?
• “C”uriosity – What do they perceive as a win? What do they need to feel protected?
• “O”ptimism – How do you want this interaction to turn out?

This isn’t about excusing poor behavior or being naïve. It’s about showing up with confidence and compassion, rather than frustration… which rarely gets us where we want to go.

Your tone matters more than you think.

2. Practice Gratitude

This may sound counterintuitive, but stay with me.

Instead of resenting the challenge, try saying (even silently): “Thank you for the challenge to grow my influence.”

Gratitude brings perspective.

Perspective brings calm.

And calm leadership is incredibly persuasive.

If nothing else, it brings a little levity to a heavy situation, and that alone can change the energy of how you show up.

3. Learn, Then Plan (Especially If You’ve Been Excluded)

I’ve recently seen several clients purposefully excluded from meetings both in-person and virtual. And while that never feels good, it’s important not to judge the situation, but to observe and learn from it.

Ask yourself:

• Why was it important for me to be in that room?
• Why might they have chosen not to include me?
• What relationships or perceptions were at play?

From there, you create a plan (or what I often call a mini campaign) to ensure next time is different.

That might include:

• Proactively building the relationship with that peer
• Making your value to the meeting visible before it happens
• Helping them see that your presence actually benefits them

When someone believes it’s good for them that you’re in the room, the dynamic changes completely.

You Can Reclaim Your Influence

If a peer has ever caused you to lose visibility, impact, or influence with leadership, please know this:

• It’s a real challenge.
• And there is a proven process to move through it.
• Develop strategic empathy.
• Lead with confidence and compassion.