I Thought I Had to Be Perfect to Be Loved

A healing journey through shame, fear of rejection, and finally feeling worthy—just as you are

She tried so hard to be good enough—
Perfect enough to be chosen.
Quiet enough to stay.
Strong enough to not be a burden.
But no matter how much she gave, she still felt like too much… and never enough.
If you’ve ever performed love just to feel safe, this book understands the ache beneath your smile.
I Thought I Had to Be Perfect to Be Loved is not a how-to. It’s a heart-to-heart.
Lena Hartley guides you through the hidden shame that keeps you shrinking, the fear of being seen, and the moment you finally let go of performing.
Each chapter reads like a soft conversation with someone who’s lived it too—and finally stopped believing she had to earn love to deserve it.
This book is your permission to rest.
To be messy. To take up space.
To stop editing yourself to be lovable.
You don’t have to prove your worth anymore.
You were always enough. Let this book remind you.