How to Have Impossible Conversations

A Very Practical Guide

By: Peter Boghossian, James Lindsay

Narrated by: Peter Boghossian

Length: 6 hrs and 36 mins

Publisher's summary

From politics and religion to workplace negotiations, ace the high-stakes conversations in your life with this indispensable guide from a persuasion expert.

In our current political climate, it seems impossible to have a reasonable conversation with anyone who has a different opinion. Whether you're online, in a classroom, an office, a town hall—or just hoping to get through a family dinner with a stubborn relative—dialogue shuts down when perspectives clash. Heated debates often lead to insults and shaming, blocking any possibility of productive discourse. Everyone seems to be on a hair trigger.

In How to Have Impossible Conversations, Peter Boghossian and James Lindsay guide you through the straightforward, practical, conversational techniques necessary for every successful conversation—whether the issue is climate change, religious faith, gender identity, race, poverty, immigration, or gun control. Boghossian and Lindsay teach the subtle art of instilling doubts and opening minds. They cover everything from learning the fundamentals for good conversations to achieving expert-level techniques to deal with hardliners and extremists. This book is the manual everyone needs to foster a climate of civility, connection, and empathy.

"This is a self-help book on how to argue effectively, conciliate, and gently persuade. The authors admit to getting it wrong in their own past conversations. One by one, I recognize the same mistakes in me. The world would be a better place if everyone read this book."—Richard Dawkins, author of Science in the Soul and Outgrowing God

©2019 Peter Boghossian and James Lindsay (P)2019 Hachette Audio

Critic reviews

"This is a self-help book on how to argue effectively, conciliate, gently persuade. The authors admit to getting it wrong in their own past conversations. One by one, I recognize the same mistakes in me. The world would be a better place if everyone read this book."—Richard Dawkins, author of Science in the Soul and Outgrowing God

"In a Free Republic there would be no 'impossible conversations', which begs the question: are we truly free anymore? After reading, listening and conversing with Peter and James, I am convinced that they are the Galileo's, I. Kant and even William Tynsdale of our time."—Glenn Beck

"I thought I knew all I needed to know about conversations and arguments. I was wrong. I just knew a lot about debates and rows. In their insightful and highly readable new book, Peter Boghossian and James Lindsay offer all kinds of ingenious pathways to constructive dialogue. At a time when public discourse has degenerated into mud-slinging and when campuses favour every kind of diversity except viewpoint diversity, this is an invaluable contribution. I guarantee that reading it will make you more—much more—persuasive."—Niall Ferguson, Milbank Family Senior Fellow, The Hoover Institution, Stanford

prerequisite to civility

this book should be reading material for people of all backgrounds. in the age of Twitter president and cancel culture, it is of utmost importance to relearn the art of enjoying a conversation, no matter how much of difference of opinion exists.

Lots of Christian strawmen

It has a lot of good tips and techniques and I think that we would all have better interactions with people if we all studied and learned these techniques. That being said, the authors either haven't talked to very many Christians, haven't talked with educated Christians, or are being dishonest in their portrayal of Christians. The narrator also has some difficulty pronouncing certain words, such as similarly. I would still recommend this book

Not terrible, just "meh".

The book had some useful information but wasn't easy to stay interested in. I like books where it ends and I'm left feeling like, "I wish it wasn't over!". This one kept me feeling like, "Let me just get through it". I didn't hate it, but I wouldn't recommend it to a friend.

Wonderful book

A wonderful book. I’m on my second read!! I’m sure there will be a third read

Good Read

I would suggest this to anyone who has been having a difficult time having conversations with people with different views. I learned that I have not been listening and trying to throw facts at people. This is where I plan to start in my practice of having good conversations. Thank you for writing this book. I'm sure I will re-read it.

A must read in 2020

I am very thankful for the authors for this incredible audible. I found what I expected: useful tools to navigated difficult conversación, especially politics and religion.
If more people would apply this tecnics, I think we could live in a more civilized society...

What a fantastic book!

Thank you to the authors for writing this book. I've just finished the first listening and will start another shortly with my note taking at the ready. It is unusual to find a fairly prescriptive book for such a nebulous, complex topic. It's a wonderful work and I greatly appreciate your insights.

a book a day!

I learned alot from this book. it was a struggle for me to keep up with the book.

Very Useful!

This is a workbook. I have the audio, however, I’ll be getting the digital copy as well. Some of these techniques need to be thought and worked through.

Teaches what we lack most in society

Basically an advanced manners book that teaches us to get past our differences and learn how to have polite and respectful conversations with most anyone, no matter how big our differences are. Also planning on using this to talk to my teen!