-
George Carlin Reads to You
- An Audio Collection Including Grammy Winners 'Braindroppings' and 'Napalm & Silly Putty'
- Narrated by: George Carlin
- Length: 7 hrs and 5 mins
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Publisher's summary
If one George Carlin audio is funny, then two are funnier and three must be funniest, right? That's our thinking behind this new collection. It's a HighBridge library of laugh-out-loud, award-winning recordings featuring George himself performing many of his best bits. The set includes:
Brain Droppings
Acerbic observations, manic musings, in-your-face questions, witty word play, and more "droppings" from Carlin's singular brain. "I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed." "Why are there no recreational drugs taken in suppository form?" The first Carlin book on audio and a 2001 Grammy winner.
Napalm & Silly Putty
Carlin invents Past-Tense TV (Got Smart, Father Knew Best, It Was Left to Beaver); crusades for the Center for Research into the Heebie Jeebies; founds the George Carlin Book Club (recommended reading: Fill Your Life with Croutons); and suggests that "If the shoe fits, get another just like it." A 2002 Grammy winner.
More Napalm & Silly Putty
Everything that wouldn't fit on the first Napalm recording - like "A Day in the Life of Henry VIII", "Sports Should Be Fixed", compelling confessions ("I couldn't commit suicide if my life depended on it"), and candid takes on life's little moments ("I'm beyond the nice day"), all delivered with wicked glee.
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In the year 2038, there’s only one destination that can play host to the world’s wealthiest adventure seekers: the Pengalaman Island Resort and Virtual Reality Theme Park. Located on a private South Pacific island, guests here live out their wildest fantasies in custom-made virtual reality simulations while also enjoying the usual amenities of an exclusive five-star getaway. All is relatively breezy until famed billionaire and avid guest, Mr. Wagner, goes missing within a virtual simulation. His only hope? A daring rescue led by Derek Ambrose and his ragtag search party.
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Story is a Bit Stupid
- By Jeffrey veals on 04-03-20
By: John Lutz
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The Heron
- By: Don Winslow
- Narrated by: Ed Harris
- Length: 1 hr and 6 mins
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“The Heron” is the nickname a big-city accountant has attached to himself in his new home near San Diego, where he’s using the alias to avoid a hit man who may be after him. It seems a former client believes that The Heron has skipped town with several million dollars not his own. Don Winslow’s ensuing, entertaining yarn is by turns twisty, dark, and comical as we observe the delicate dance between the pursuer and the pursued.
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Awfully long middle for such a short story
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 07-29-22
By: Don Winslow
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Made in America
- By: Bill Bryson
- Narrated by: William Roberts
- Length: 18 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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In Made in America, Bryson de-mythologizes his native land, explaining how a dusty hamlet with neither woods nor holly became Hollywood, how the Wild West wasn't won, why Americans say 'lootenant' and 'Toosday', how Americans were eating junk food long before the word itself was cooked up, as well as exposing the true origins of the G-string, the original $64,000 question, and Dr Kellogg of cornflakes fame.
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Bryson Not Reading Makes For a Rare Fail
- By John on 02-28-14
By: Bill Bryson
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Good, but not like the stand-up
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Grammy Winner for Best Spoken Comedy Album
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George Carlin's 18th album. It was recorded simultaneously with the live broadcast of his 13th HBO special.
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classic
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Good, but not like the stand-up
- By Anonymous User on 10-10-21
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classic
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This set contains three of George Carlin's classic albums from the 1970s in their entirety: FM & AM, Class Clown, and Occupation Foole.
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Carlin's riffs on religion and terrorism on this album are classic. He even tackles the timely topic of airport security. Nobody dissects untouchable subjects better than the nimble mind of George Carlin. Recorded for an HBO live broadcast stand-up special on February 6, 1999.
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another classic Carlin
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If you missed the HBO special, it's all here and it's all hysterical. George goes off on every subject under the sun and a few other planets too. Be the first one on your cell block to buy this great performance.
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Carlin's CV with no Depth or Insight
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Parental Advisory
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Okay, you might want to remove children under the age of nine from the room before listening to this brilliant album. When they turn 10, you might want to reconsider. Kids are going to learn this language sooner or later, so why not from George? It's Carlin's 12th comedy album, and most of it comes from his seventh HBO special Doin' It Again.
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George Carlin- The Greatest Observer of Mankind.
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Comedian George Carlin's definitive monologue was delivered on this 1972 album, his third, in the form of Seven Dirty Words You Can Never Say on Television. The FCC and Supreme Court held the routine as the epitome of tastelessness, threatening to yank the license of any station that dare play it over public airwaves. So you know it has to be funny. Buy it today and shock your parents!
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Top 5 comedy album of all time
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A Carlin Home Companion
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Truly the voice of a generation, George Carlin gave the world some of the most hysterical and iconic comedy routines of the last 50 years. He perfected the art of making audiences double over with laughter while simultaneously making people wake up to the realities (and insanities) of life in the 20th century. Few people glimpsed the inner life of this beloved comedian, but his only child, Kelly, was there to see it all.
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A wonderful journey
- By Christopher on 09-18-15
By: Kelly Carlin
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Carlin on Campus
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This fourth HBO special by George Carlin was recorded on April 18 and 19, 1984 and features mostly new material. The opening features Carlin in Catholic school with a short version of "Class Clown" and animation shorts. The ending features Carlin playing piano to an original song called "Armadillo Blues".
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A legend
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A Place for My Stuff!
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Classic Carlin all the way. His eighth comedy album after a five year break. Unlike earlier releases, A Place For My Stuff contains a number of studio tracks in addition to live performances, and he pokes fun at the format and candor of community radio, commercials, and television with aplomb.
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Comdedy Classic
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Are the kids asleep? Yes? Good. This one isn’t for them. Now, if your weary, grown-up mind has been searching for a snarkier alternative to your favorite childhood tales, this Audible Original, hosted by Nick Offerman (Parks & Recreation), will scratch that itch - and then some. Enjoy a hilarious collection of short stories, featuring performances from the likes of Tommy Chong (Cheech & Chong), Tony Hale (Veep), Patton Oswalt (The Goldbergs), and David Spade (Saturday Night Live).
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It's Just...Alright.
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The Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee Book
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A celebration of and behind-the-scenes look at Jerry Seinfeld’s groundbreaking streaming series Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee—a one-of-a-kind audio collection featuring some of comedy’s most iconic voices in excerpts from their appearances on the show!
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meh
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Warren Buffett Speaks
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Over the years, as Warren Buffett's influence and affluence have grown, one thing has remained the same - his unpretentious, honest, and optimistic approach toward business and life. Now you can discover life's little secrets of success as revealed by the world¿s greatest investor.
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A Great Listen!
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What listeners say about George Carlin Reads to You
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Rick
- 07-16-12
Like a Cast of Thousands
George Carlin need only be heard to be appreciated. You remember him pacing and gesturing as he crouched on the stage, delivering rapid-fire, surgical observations on the follies of humankind. Maybe it's his early days in radio, but the voice is among the most expressive anywhere. He leaps from rage to rant to sotto voce, from lecturing to confiding, as he plays a whole range of the characters who populate his wildly imaginative essays. You could listen to him for hours--and you will. Along the way you'll remember that Carlin was never just a comic. He was an articulate, informed, educated, and always opinionated eyewitness to the human condition. Hilarious and off-color, of course, but he covers an awful lot of ground in this collection, and really makes you think.
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- Jim "The Impatient"
- 12-31-12
Tiger Woods is not Black
According to George Carlin, Tiger Woods is not black, skin color has nothing to do with it. I believe Carlin thought he was black. Pipe smokers should just suck d#@k, People who walk around listening to walkmans are arrogant pricks. As I was walking my dog listening to Carlin on my headphones, thinking about smoking my pipe when I got home, I found this a strange way to start out a book. Oh just before that he talked how other comedians where idiots who had hope and always offered advice to fix things and how they are political and he is not. I then listened to seven hours of how he could make the world better and his views on politics. He starts out by pretty much bashing everybody. He thinks people in the midwest are soft and boring, the people in the South are all bigots, etc. The only ones worth a sh@t are the New Yorkers, cause they live everyday knowing they can get mugged.
Ignoring the constant put downs, negativity, and trying to make himself seem different by just saying off the wall things he thinks might piss someone off, I find him to be very, very funny and smart. (Although anybody can bitch, that does not take smarts.) I love almost all his routines on the English language and how Americans use them. Like the routine about getting on an Airplane. He is getting in, not on and all the terms used in flying, like the Terminal, etc. I love how he describes baseball, how he feels about those who want to save the planet, his comments on dogs, prostitution, time, germs, what true sports are, cats, etc.
He puts down yuppies (he who wore a pony tail for how long?), businessmen, people with money, (he was probably a millionaire), whites (he who was lily white), anyone who lives anyplace other then New York ( he moved to California). He calls several people arrogant, yet to be a comedian or a writer don't you have to believe you are so important other people will pay to hear you or buy your books or buy the audible versions of your books that you read. When your busy being arrogant and putting everyone else down it is hard to see your own faults.
I gave this four stars, cause he is entertaining and gives you plenty to think about. You just need to be prepared to have your self put down in some way, it will happen, brush it off and listen to what he really has to say.
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65 people found this helpful
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- Jeff Harris
- 05-06-13
For the George Carlin Fan
Some of the readings in this book came right from George's stand-up but that is perfectly fine with me! Full of short stories, thoughtful sentences, and vulgar comments, this audiobook is definitely for the George Carlin Fan.
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33 people found this helpful
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- Brian
- 07-22-12
Concentrated Carlin
This is George reading his books. His books that were largely based on his years of stand up. If you like George Carlin's sense of humor then this is the right book for you. Drop a credit and have some laughs
If however, you are easily offended by words that begin with a harsh F and end with a hard K then this might not be the book for you.
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- Ethan Tyler Reilly
- 05-10-12
Very Similar to His Stand-Up Material
What made the experience of listening to George Carlin Reads to You the most enjoyable?
George Carlin read this when he was older so his voice is better, I think. In fact, he read it at the perfect time - when he was old enough to develop a certain kind of comedic voice without getting too old like he was during his last HBO special.
What other book might you compare George Carlin Reads to You to and why?
Any of his stand-up material. In fact, too often he repeats the exact same things from his stand-up material. There is new material, but half of the time the new material is one-liners. There's no real transitions besides a piano roll at the end of each chapter, and what's even worse, is that the chapters aren't even very coherent themselves sometimes.
Have you listened to any of George Carlin’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
Much of this is exactly the same as his stand-up material. I have seen all his stand-up stuff as well as seen interviews with him, so not much is different than what I already know. There are a few major differences, however, between this and his stand-up comedy. For instance, there is no audience, he doesn't have the exact same passion as he does in his stand-up (although it is close), and as stated before, there are piano rolls at the beginning of each new chapter.
If you were to make a film of this book, what would be the tag line be?
"Listen to George Carlin's jokes for over seven hours!"
Any additional comments?
If you like his stand-up material, you'll like this. This is a bargain of a price for over seven hours worth of jokes. However, if you've already seen all his stand-up, you probably won't need this. But for this is a must for any die-hard Carlin fan (as myself), and anyone looking for a good quote.
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19 people found this helpful
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- Kyle
- 02-05-13
Hard Not To Smile While You Listen!
Would you consider the audio edition of George Carlin Reads to You to be better than the print version?
I would simply for the reason that it's akin to getting another 7 hours or so of George Carlin's standup. He doesn't simply read the words on the page but brings life to them and it's easy to feel like you're watching him do a set.
What other book might you compare George Carlin Reads to You to and why?
I can't think of another book that compares to this one.
What does George Carlin bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?
His pace, tone, and attitude as he reads the books. It's in between a live show and just a standard narration but as a big George Carlin fan it was great to hear him read these books.
Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?
I found myself coming back to his book after every wook interruption or short break to rest my ears. It's easy to listen to in chunks because there is no major over-arching storyline but prolonged listeneing just left me smiling like a fool at my desk.
Any additional comments?
I really enjoyed this book! Any fan of Carlin's stand up would probably enjoy this audio book!
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13 people found this helpful
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- Charlotte
- 12-13-13
Hilarious!
Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?
Yes! I and all my friends miss George Carlin big time. He was so funny!
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
Laughed until I cried.
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- Kevin
- 09-09-14
George I Love Ya But...
Would you recommend this book to a friend? Why or why not?
Georgeorgeorge orgeorge if you know Carlin you know the joke.
What was the most interesting aspect of this story? The least interesting?
It was an education in what almost works.
What do you think the narrator could have done better?
Stop reading and do the show.
Did George Carlin Reads to You inspire you to do anything?
yes! Avoid my cousin.
Any additional comments?
George has some great stuff he uses in his shows. I mean rolling on the floor FUNNY. This is 7 hours of the other stuff. It's like going on a road trip with that cousin that was funny at the wedding reception last year, but now you're stuck in the car with him for SEVEN F'N HOURS.
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- joyce
- 02-02-14
sad! I couldn't listen to the end
I have loved George Carlin since we were both young. He was wacky, so inventive, so wildly irreverent and obscene. His monologue on war probably killed some people, because it left (still leaves) me limp and gasping for air from laughing too hard. He performed almost up to the time of his death from cancer, and he seemed haggard and frail, and I can easily believe that he might have been angry or bitter about it. But this collection of essays is so nasty I could not listen to the whole book. Although just hearing Carlin's voice can make me ready to laugh, these essays are just ugly. Ruthless insults, unjustifiable hostility and rancor towards people who are absent-minded, or maybe not as cool as he is, or who dare to bring kids into his general area. Very sad!! It really made me sad. Rest in peace, George.
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- Jennifer Firman
- 04-15-18
wonderful
great from start to finish would highly recommend a must for George Carlin fans a+
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