Maybe I was crazy. I had asked for this--quite literally. It's not easy being a virgin during your freshman year in college. Almost everyone is hooking up, and there you are, left alone in the dorm. I'd tried going out and getting involved with someone, but it just never worked out. I always got too scared. I wanted to lose my virginity, but I was just afraid of it. I wanted to stay the good little girl my parents had raised. And I'd heard horror stories of bad first times that hurt so badly. I didn't want that. Then, one night I asked my roommate for some help, and agreed to be tied up. If I was going to lose my virginity like I wanted, I was going to have to be forced.