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Where'd You Go, Bernadette
- A Novel
- Narrated by: Kathleen Wilhoite
- Length: 9 hrs and 35 mins
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Publisher's summary
Bernadette Fox is notorious. To her Microsoft-guru husband, she's a fearlessly opinionated partner; to fellow private-school mothers in Seattle, she's a disgrace; to design mavens, she's a revolutionary architect, and to 15-year-old Bee, she is a best friend and, simply, Mom.
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Featured Article: 30+ Quotes About Creativity to Inspire Your Process
No matter what field you’re in—be it art, writing, science, tech, or sales—coming up with creative ideas can be frustrating. But here’s the reassuring truth: every single creative has struggled with the same fears. Fortunately, many have documented their experiences, leaving us the words we need to hear when we really feel stuck. We’ve compiled this handy list of creativity quotes from people in all different fields to help guide and inspire you.
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Story
Emily Bell believes in destiny. To her, being forced to sing a solo in the church choir - despite her average voice - is fate: because it's while she's singing that she first sees Sam. At first sight they are connected. Sam Border wishes he could escape, but there's nowhere for him to run. He and his little brother, Riddle, have spent their entire lives constantly uprooted by their unstable father. As Sam and Riddle are welcomed into the Bells' lives, they witness the warmth and protection of a family for the first time.
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Needs to be a film!
- By TreasureHunter on 06-25-16
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The Portable Veblen
- By: Elizabeth Mckenzie
- Narrated by: Julia Gibson
- Length: 12 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
An exuberant, one-of-a-kind novel about love and family, war and nature, new money and old values by a brilliant New Yorker contributor. The Portable Veblen is a dazzlingly original novel that's as big-hearted as it is laugh-out-loud funny. Set in and around Palo Alto amid the culture clash of new money and old (antiestablishment) values, and with the specter of our current wars looming across its words, The Portable Veblen is an unforgettable look at the way we live now.
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Not what it was cracked up to be
- By Linda on 02-03-16
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Diamonds in the Shadow
- By: Caroline B. Cooney
- Narrated by: Oliver Wyman
- Length: 6 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Through their love for people, yet ignorance of the unknown, the Finch Family has joined alongside their church and opened their home to an African refugee family who are moving to Connecticut. The Amabo family of four Andre, Celestine, Mattu, and Alake: father, mother, and teenage son and daughter arrive in great hope as they have escaped the tyranny of Africa. What the Finch Family doesnt know is that there are not just four refugees in this Amabo family, but five.
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Best Book Ever!!
- By Kylie on 08-13-15
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How to Be a Grown-Up
- By: Emma McLaughlin, Nicola Kraus
- Narrated by: Tara Sands
- Length: 7 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Rory McGovern is entering the prime of her life when her husband loses his dream job and announces he feels like "taking a break". Rory was already spread thin and now, without warning, she is single-parenting two kids, juggling their science projects, flu season, and pajama days, while coming to terms with her disintegrating marriage. Without Blake, her only hope is to accept a full-time position working for two full-time 20-somethings.
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Performance
- By Jill on 02-10-16
By: Emma McLaughlin, and others
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The Silent History
- By: Eli Horowitz, Matthew Derby, Kevin Moffett
- Narrated by: Gabra Zackman, LJ Ganser
- Length: 14 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
It begins as a statistical oddity: a spike in children born with acute speech delays. Physically normal in every way, these children never speak and do not respond to speech; they don't learn to read, don't learn to write. As the number of cases grows to an epidemic level, theories spread. Maybe it's related to a popular antidepressant; maybe it's environmental. Or maybe these children have special skills all their own.
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A Thought-Provoking Premise
- By Doug - Audible on 03-31-15
By: Eli Horowitz, and others
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Until I Say Good-Bye
- My Year of Living with Joy
- By: Susan Spencer-Wendel, Bret Witter
- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 9 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Susan Spencer-Wendel's Until I Say Good-Bye: My Year of Living with Joy is a moving and inspirational memoir by a woman who makes the most of her final days after discovering she has amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS). After Spencer-Wendel, a celebrated journalist at the Palm Beach Post, learns of her diagnosis of ALS, more commonly known as Lou Gehrig's disease, she embarks on several adventures, traveling to several countries and sharing special experiences with loved ones.
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Until I Say Good-Bye is a paradox for me.
- By Bonny on 03-19-13
By: Susan Spencer-Wendel, and others
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True Stories from an Unreliable Eyewitness
- A Feminist Coming of Age
- By: Christine Lahti
- Narrated by: Christine Lahti
- Length: 5 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
For decades, actress and director Christine Lahti has captivated the hearts and minds of her audience through iconic roles in Chicago Hope, Running on Empty, Housekeeping, And Justice for All, Swing Shift, Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, God of Carnage, and The Blacklist. Now, in True Stories from an Unreliable Eyewitness, this acclaimed performer channels her creativity inward to share her own story for the first time.
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Christine Lahti, Actress, Activist and A+ Author!
- By L. Cat Schultz on 10-26-18
By: Christine Lahti
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Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter
- By: Melissa Francis
- Narrated by: Cris Dukehart
- Length: 9 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When Melissa Francis was eight years old, she won the role of lifetime: playing Cassandra Cooper Ingalls, the little girl who was adopted with her brother (played by young Jason Bateman) by the Ingalls family on the world’s most famous prime-time soap opera, Little House on the Prairie. But behind the scenes, her success was fueled by the pride, pressure, and sometimes grinding cruelty of her stage mother.
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Awesome book - really enjoyed it.
- By Jane C. Bailey on 11-16-12
By: Melissa Francis
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My Year with Eleanor
- A Memoir
- By: Noelle Hancock
- Narrated by: Emily Beresford
- Length: 9 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
After losing her high-octane job as an entertainment blogger, Noelle Hancock was lost. About to turn 29, she'd spent her career writing about celebrities' lives and had forgotten how to live her own. Unemployed and full of self-doubt, she had no idea what she wanted out of life. She feared change - in fact, she feared almost everything. Once confident and ambitious, she had become crippled by anxiety, lacking the courage required even to attend a dinner party - until inspiration struck one day in the form of a quote on a chalkboard in a coffee shop.
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Right on time!
- By Leah on 02-19-18
By: Noelle Hancock
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If I am Missing or Dead
- A Sister's Story of Love, Murder, and Liberation
- By: Janine Latus
- Narrated by: Shelly Frasier
- Length: 8 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In April 2002, Janine Latus' youngest sister, Amy, wrote a note and taped it to the inside of her desk drawer. "Today Ron Ball and I are romantically involved", it read, "but I fear I have placed myself at risk in a variety of ways. Based on his criminal past, writing this out just seems like the smart thing to do. If I am missing or dead this obviously has not protected me...."
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All About Janine
- By Ellen on 07-02-07
By: Janine Latus
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Get Lucky
- By: Katherine Center
- Narrated by: Morgan Hallett
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Filled with wit and heart, Get Lucky by Katherine Center explores the deep bonds of sisterhood. Sarah Harper’s whole world revolved around her job at a New York advertising agency before an email snafu got her fired. Now she’s seeking refuge at her sister Mackie’s home in Houston. But Mackie, who’s unable to get pregnant, is also down-and-out these days. So Sarah decides to do something good and becomes a surrogate mother.
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Good story.
- By joan hammontree on 01-17-24
By: Katherine Center
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Everything You Ever Wanted
- A Memoir
- By: Jillian Lauren
- Narrated by: Jillian Lauren
- Length: 8 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In her younger years, Jillian Lauren was a college dropout, a drug addict, and an international concubine in the Prince of Brunei's harem, an experience she immortalized in her best-selling memoir, Some Girls. In her 30s, Jillian's most radical act is learning the steadying power of love when she and her rock star husband adopt an Ethiopian child with special needs.
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Great for adoptive families
- By berry bomb on 07-06-22
By: Jillian Lauren
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Dating Dead Men
- By: Harley Jane Kozak
- Narrated by: Deanna Hurst
- Length: 10 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Los Angeles greeting-card artist Wollie Shelley is dating 40 men in 60 days as research for a radio talk show host's upcoming book. Wollie is meeting plenty of eligible bachelors but not falling in love, not until she stumbles over a dead body en route to Rio Pescado - a state-run mental hospital - and is taken hostage by a charismatic "doctor" who is on the run from the Mob.
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Another Stephanie Plum
- By Don on 08-30-12
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Enjoyable narration. Story is an easy read.
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At fifty-three, Maggie Harris has a good marriage and two mostly happy children. Perpetually anxious, she’s also accumulated a list of semi-reasonable fears: falling air conditioners, the IRS, identity theft, skydiving, and airbag recalls. But never once did Maggie worry that her husband of nearly thirty years would leave her.
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AMY MCFADDEN narrates another great book . . . . .
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The only child of a single mother, Nina has her life just as she wants it: a job in a bookstore, a kick-butt trivia team, a world-class planner and a cat named Phil. If she sometimes suspects there might be more to life than reading, she just shrugs and picks up a new book. When the father Nina never knew existed suddenly dies, leaving behind innumerable sisters, brothers, nieces, and nephews, Nina is horrified. They all live close by! They're all - or mostly all - excited to meet her! She'll have to Speak. To. Strangers. It's a disaster!
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1987. There’s only one person who has ever truly understood fourteen-year-old June Elbus, and that’s her uncle, the renowned painter Finn Weiss. Shy at school and distant from her older sister, June can only be herself in Finn’s company; he is her godfather, confidant, and best friend. So when he dies, far too young, of a mysterious illness her mother can barely speak about, June’s world is turned upside down. But Finn’s death brings a surprise acquaintance into June’s life - someone who will help her to heal....
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worst protagonist ever
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Naïve. Super
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Troubled by an inability to find any meaning in his life, the 25-year-old narrator of this deceptively simple novel quits university and eventually arrives at his brother's New York apartment. In a bid to discover what life is all about, he writes lists. He becomes obsessed by time and whether it actually matters. He faxes his meteorologist friend. He endlessly bounces a ball against the wall. He befriends a small boy who lives next door. He yearns to get to the bottom of life and how best to live it.
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numerous and lengthy list-writing throughout
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Confessions of a Domestic Failure
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Narrator overacted... first book I've returned to audible
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Eighty-nine-year-old Isabelle McAllister has a big favor to ask her hairdresser, Dorrie. She wants the black single mother to drop everything and drive her from Texas to a funeral in Ohio - tomorrow. Dorrie, fleeing problems of her own and curious about Isabelle’s past, agrees, not knowing it will be a journey that changes both their lives. Isabelle confesses that, as a teen in 1930s Kentucky, she fell in love with Robert Prewitt, a would-be doctor and the black son of her family’s housekeeper - in a town where blacks weren’t allowed after dark. The tale of their forbidden relationship and its tragic consequences just might help Dorrie find her own way.
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I really wanted to like it
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Blackberry Winter
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Seattle, 1933: Vera Ray kisses her three-year-old son, Daniel, good night and reluctantly leaves for work. She hates the night shift, but it’s the only way she can earn enough to keep destitution at bay. In the morning - even though it’s the second of May - a heavy snow is falling. Vera rushes to wake Daniel, but his bed is empty. His teddy bear lies outside in the snow. Seattle, present day: On the second of May, reporter Claire Aldridge awakens to another late-season snowstorm. Assigned to cover this "blackberry winter" and its predecessor decades earlier, Claire learns of Daniel’s unsolved abduction and vows to unearth the truth.
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Cleverly Constructed
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The Readers of Broken Wheel Recommend
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It all began with a correspondence between two quite different women: 28-year-old Sara from Haninge, Sweden, and 65-year-old Amy from the small town of Broken Wheel, Iowa. After years of exchanging books, letters and thoughts on the meaning of literature and life, Sara, mousy, disheveled, who has never been anywhere in her life--has really lived only for her work in a beloved bookshop, which has just closed its doors for the last time--bravely decides to accept her unknown friend's invitation to visit. But when she arrives, she finds her house empty, the funeral guests just heading home. . .
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Disappointed - no depth & poor narration
- By Kelly on 01-28-16
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The Department of Lost & Found
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Overall
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Performance
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In this hopeful, humorous, and astonishingly deft debut, Allison Winn Scotch explores what happens when a young woman thinks she's lost everything that matters' and ends up discovering what's truly important. This is a novel that will leave you taking stock of what's important in your own life . . . and never letting it go.
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specific in your descriptions of books
- By Beverly on 03-11-12
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The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared
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After a long and eventful life, Allan Karlsson ends up in a nursing home, believing it to be his last stop. The only problem is that he's still in good health, and in one day, he turns 100. A big celebration is in the works, but Allan really isn't interested (and he'd like a bit more control over his vodka consumption). So he decides to escape. He climbs out the window in his slippers and embarks on a hilarious and entirely unexpected journey, involving, among other surprises, a suitcase stuffed with cash.
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Dared to let the kids listen and they loved it...
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What listeners say about Where'd You Go, Bernadette
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
- JillHen
- 01-28-16
Misleading cover contains excellent novel
I expected 'chick-lit' because of the cover--- I don't need to read about a red-lipsticked 22 year old discovering herself through a series of cute foibles. I took a leap of faith owing to the abundant praise. I was not disappointed.
It's a quirky story-- a fun story, an unusual story with unusual characters. A young daughter tells the story of her odd mother, father, and the events of a several month period in the uppity community the inhabit. The narrator is also unusual (listen to sample first-- might turn you off if you are sensitive to less conventional voices) and does a wonderful job delivering sophisticated themes with the matter-of-fact manner of a child.
Though somewhat dark, the story never becomes melodramatic. The gravitas is cleverly enfolded in humor and the naivete of the narrator (the story's narrator as well as the performer.) The characters' questionable choices lead to inevitable consequences which form a web that intertwines wonderfully: A domino effect. Complex and satisfying.
There's a lot more here than just good entertainment. As for the cover: I have no idea who that spunky young chick is. She doesn't really fit the description of a younger Bernadette, nor anyone else.
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- S
- 11-07-12
One of my top 10 listens of the year!
Any additional comments?
Like other reviewers said, there is something about this book that makes you feel like a glowing review somehow doesn't do it justice and can't adequately explain why this book is so entertaining and sweet.
Bernadette is a stifled artist who redirects her genius energy with some odd behavior. Elgin is her genius husband who works a little too much and misses some important goings on in his family. Bee is their daughter, a mix of the two--also genius, humorous and insightful. So, how is it that Bernadette goes missing? Well, that's where this book gets really entertaining.
The story is told through emails, letters and documents compiled into a book by Bee and it's a fun read. All of the characters are well written and Kathleen Wilhoitte does a great job of giving them each a distinct voice. It does take a little time to get used to, as she tends to be a little overexcited as Bee and their neighbor, but I really came to enjoy it by the end. You somehow end up loving and sympathizing with every character, even through their mistakes.
I was sad when this one ended!
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- Bobbie
- 08-15-12
Best listen of the summer!
This book deserves to be reviewed by someone who has one tenth of the writing talent of Janet Maslin but that's not me. I am in a much lower percentile. So please stick with me while I try to describe how this wonderful novel became my favorite of the summer.
The plot moves along so fast with so many twists I listened in one sitting always anticipating what would come next. All the characters are human, not caricatures, and the hilarity comes from their interactions and obsessions.
I live in the desert and after months of triple digit temperatures I become as agoraphobic as Bernadette. I love the cooling memory of Seattle's rain, but Bernadette hates the city's weather and its culture, stays inside at her computer and maintains her closest friendship with her "virtual assistant" in India.
Her husband Elgin is a star at Microsoft, has given the fourth most watched lecture at TED where Al Gore and David Pogue were in attendance. There's a liberal sprinkling of techie ikons through the narrative to enjoy if you read tech columns and wish you could understand Wired Magazine articles.
Their daughter Bee, 14, graduating with straight S 's (S = Surpasses Excellence) from Galer Street school is rewarded with a family trip to Antarctica. Bee's character is like fresh air out of the Northwest. She has no affectations, no cell phone addiction and listens to MP3's on her Zune. She "gets" both parents.
Bernadette's antipathy toward the school's parent association and her fear of the Antarctica trip are the initial psychological motivations. The flash point is her neighbor Audrey's demand to have her yard cleared of blackberry bushes. Audrey is part of the Galer street parent group and receives the brunt of Bernadette's spite but gives back as good as she gets. The fighting provides lots of the laughs.
Even the minor characters are beautifully drawn and full of surprises. From the "blackberry abatement specialist" who doesn't want Audrey's chard to her delinquent son, all are unique and clearly rendered.
What caused Bernadette's initial escape from LA to Seattle? Where did she disappear to this time? It's great fun to get to the answers.
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- Mel
- 08-20-12
Here Comes the Sun, doo doo doo doo
A case of one skill translating perfectly to another field...Maria Semple is an accomplished TV writer (Mad About you, Arrested Development) with years of perfecting the art of compacting a storyline with dialogue and comedy into the most effective punch possible for a time slot. It's a good thing books don't come with laugh tracks--or you'd be downloading thousands of hours to accompany this energetic and hilarious romp--because it is funny. Not rolling off the couch guffawing or holding your sides funny, but clever snarky fun that Semple reigns in just enough to keep her characters real and multi-dimensional instead of implausible quirky stand-ins delivering witty one-liners. These people are smart, troubled, caring, and completely original, all tumbling down a slippery slope from LA to Seattle to Argentina to India (and the Russian mafia) to the Antartica--a story that follows one misunderstanding along all of its crazy off-shoots. Seattle, seen through the eyes of native Californian Bernadette's eyes, becomes a wacky character itself.
Bernadette is a "misplaced" LA to Seattle artist that "can't create," causing mayhem and acting on whims and pent-up anxiety; Elgin is a brainiac that spends his shoe-less days as a Micorsoft demi-god; Bee is the precocious perfect mix of the two with a insouciant bohemian heart, and a genius and insight uniquely her own (and worships the Beatles Abbey Road - lyrics, history, and all. Her mother's favorite song ironically is Here Comes the Sun; Harrison's guitar lead in "always causes [her mother] to smile.") Bee also serves as the voice that connects this series of communications (faxes, e-mails, letters, memo's, FBI reports, etc.) into a map to find her missing mother Bernadette, who escapes "the butterfly nets" during a mental-health intervention...she went out "through the bathroom window"... that ends up being more like a Keystone Cops episode.
As far as the narration...if you'd have asked me 20 min. in, I'd have said awful. The writing style is already a bit frenetic and the animated adolescent voice of Bee made me want to offer the narrator some Ritalin; I almost threw in the towel. But I was hooked enough by the charming calamity that I didn't want to quit. I also realized that when you committ to audio books you have to weigh the risk of great stories being told by not-so-great narrators, or vice versa (and the wonderful times when you get a magical pairing of 2 greats). I'm so glad I took the pragmatic approach because I ended up really liking Kathleen Willhoite; I think she may have been the perfect narrator for this story afterall (a case of a not-so-great listener...).
A fresh and captivating read that will appeal to anyone that appreciates good smart comedy and satire--just as good for Bernards as for Bernadettes. If you pass because you think this is only chick fic [?] you are missing out. I just dare you to read this and not smile. The funny feel good book of the Summer of 2012.
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- Kathy in CA
- 03-20-14
The current flipped my canoe!
You know, it is very difficult to continue against the current. Some times it is so strong it tips your boat. What is it with me that I can't enjoy this book? It isn't even a mild dislike--I can't stand it. I have gone back to it three times and each time, I cringe. It is fascinating how much I dislike it.
Bernadette is just plain silly and insensitive and unbelievable. Is it just terminal quirkiness or mental illness? I know she is supposed to be creative and clever and funny, but it just doesn't come off that way for me. And the tirade against Seattle? I think you would have had to live there to get your laughs from that. A tirade which goes on way too long. Like a comedy routine.
To make it all worse, I have no fondness for this narrator at all. So, there you have it. My rant about a book everyone else seems to love. Almost everyone.
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- Bonny
- 12-24-12
Makes funny things serious & serious things funny
I resisted reading this book for a while because it didn't sound like something I would like, but after an impulse purchase from Audible, I was very pleasantly surprised. I won't recount the plot as others have done that much better than I could, but I think I enjoyed it because it was an entertaining read that also made me think. Many other reviewers seemed to think that Bernadette was a crazy, manipulative whiner, but I found her oddly interesting, especially when parts of her backstory are revealed. Once I understood why she did some of the things she did, I felt she was a compelling character, and I could even see some of myself in her. I hope that doesn't make me crazy, but I truly think she was responding to what was going on around her, and other characters' actions in the best way she knew how. Isn't that what we all try to do?
I think another reviewer captured this book best, "This book is definitely original, in terms of structure and tone, in terms of making funny things serious and serious things funny." This is exactly what Maria Semple has done, and in doing so she has written a highly original, entertaining, and thought-provoking book, worthy of a solid 4.5 stars.
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- Catherine
- 11-25-16
Epistolary form is frustrating for audio
Where does Where'd You Go, Bernadette rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?
The book itself is entertaining. The narrator is also good. However, I find that the epistolary form was frustrating for audio: there are things like invoices, report cards, letters, etc. that don't lend themselves well to audio. I ended up stopping about 1/3 of the way through and getting the book from the library.
What other book might you compare Where'd You Go, Bernadette to and why?
Books by Nick Hornsby and Helen Fielding.
What three words best describe Kathleen Wilhoite’s performance?
Enthusiastic, fun, lively
Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?
Yes, but to post it would be a spoiler!
Any additional comments?
This is a fun book, but the reason I'm reviewing it is that I wish I'd understood it was in epistolary format before I'd bought the audiobook. There's a lot of parts of the book that are better understood by reading. I rarely stop an audiobook to get the paper format, but I did for this because it was getting too frustrating to try to envision what was on the page.
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- jillian wightman
- 09-25-12
Narrator extraordinaire for hilarious tale!
What made the experience of listening to Where'd You Go, Bernadette the most enjoyable?
The excellent narration brought the individual characters to life. I could picture each of the exchanges in emails and encounters as if they were a movie in my head. Reading this book by myself would never have been so entertaining, even though the writing is perfectly crisp and the story line is really funny. I bought this book without knowing anything about it and look forward to my daily walks just to get further along in the story.
What was one of the most memorable moments of Where'd You Go, Bernadette?
Without spoiling anything, the scene where the entire hillside of Bernadette's house slips down to crush her neighbor's durning a fundraiser for their children's school. Who knew that blackberry vines could be the only thing holding up a hillside?
Which character – as performed by Kathleen Wilhoite – was your favorite?
Bernadette!
Who was the most memorable character of Where'd You Go, Bernadette and why?
Bernadette! You have to listen to her, especially in the email to her former professor in LA. Just buy this book! It is so entertaining!
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- Diana - Audible
- 10-16-12
A little bizarre, but great fun
The gorgeous cover of this book drew me in, but it was the unique plot that kept me hooked. Bernadette Fox is a certified genius in this novel, and author Maria Semple just might be too - in addition to keeping this story fresh and funny, she also has writing credits for the ridiculously wonderful show Arrested Development. Win-win!
And while it took me some time to warm up to Kathleen Wilhoite's performance - I feared her precocious reading of 15-year-old Bee would last all nine hours - I did get there, and was floored by her beautiful singing voice, which made a surprising (but delightful) appearance late in the story.
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- Leslie
- 03-31-14
unlike any 15 year old I know
What disappointed you about Where'd You Go, Bernadette?
adolescent girl was written like a 6 year old
Would you ever listen to anything by Maria Semple again?
doubtful
Would you be willing to try another one of Kathleen Wilhoite’s performances?
no. I found most of her voices (especially B) horribly annoying
You didn’t love this book... but did it have any redeeming qualities?
the premise of story was interesting, mother a complex character
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