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Go the F--k to Sleep
- Narrated by: Thandie Newton
- Length: 4 mins
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Go the F--k to Sleep
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Publisher's summary
Go the F--k to Sleep is a bedtime book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate and refreshingly honest, it captures the familiar and unspoken tribulations of putting your child to bed for the night. Colourfully illustrated and hilariously funny, this is a breath of fresh air for parents new, old and expectant*.
*You should probably not read this to your children.
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-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 28,425
Guy Montag is a fireman. In his world, where television rules and literature is on the brink of extinction, firemen start fires rather than put them out. His job is to destroy the most illegal of commodities, the printed book, along with the houses in which they are hidden. Montag never questions the destruction and ruin his actions produce, returning each day to his bland life and wife, Mildred, who spends all day with her television "family."
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4 out of 5 stars
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Wish I Hadn't Cliff Noted This in High School
- By Joel on 03-27-17
By: Ray Bradbury
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Good Poems
- Selected and Introduced by Garrison Keillor
- By: Emily Dickinson, Walt Whitman, Robert Frost, and others
- Narrated by: Garrison Keillor
- Length: 4 hrs and 23 mins
- Abridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 196
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 158
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 147
Good Poems includes poems about lovers, children, failure, everyday life, death, and transcendence. It features the work of classic poets, such as Emily Dickinson, Walt Whitman, and Robert Frost, as well as the work of contemporary greats such as Howard Nemerov, Charles Bukowski, Donald Hall, Billy Collins, Robert Bly, and Sharon Olds Good Poems includes poems about lovers, children, failure, everyday life, death, and transcendence.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Very good, but. . .
- By KSmith on 01-27-11
By: Emily Dickinson, and others
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The Tractor Who Wants to Fall Asleep [UK English]
- A New Way of Getting Children to Sleep 3
- By: Carl-Johan Forssén Ehrlin
- Narrated by: Roy McMillan
- Length: 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 172
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 136
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 134
Do you struggle to get your child to sleep? Discover the miracle book and reclaim bedtime! Join millions of parents all over the world and embrace a bedtime routine that will help your child to relax and fall fast asleep. Let your child be lulled to sleep with Tractor Alex in a sleep-inducing ride around the farm. Along the way they meet Yawning Carrot, Half-Asleep Leon, Sleeping Apples and other friends, who tell them what they do to fall asleep at night. Your child will have a soothing and relaxing experience and can fall asleep quickly - at naptime and bedtime.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Awesome book, the logic here...a stroke of genius
- By Dacey Harlot on 05-26-19
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T'was the Night Before Christmas [Classic Tales Edition]
- By: Clement C. Moore
- Narrated by: B. J. Harrison
- Length: 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 86
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 70
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Story5 out of 5 stars 68
The original and immortal poem also known as "A Visit from St. Nicholas". Classic Tales narrator B. J. Harrison gives a stellar reading of this Christmas classic.
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5 out of 5 stars
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traditional excellent quality
- By DTerrigino on 12-19-23
By: Clement C. Moore
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The Original Adventures of Hank the Cowdog
- By: John R. Erickson
- Narrated by: John R. Erickson
- Length: 2 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,414
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,108
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,103
It's a tough job, but somebody's got to do it. Guts, glory, danger, and sacrifice are all in a day's work for Hank the Cowdog, Head of Ranch Security. While investigating a murder on the ranch, Hank finds himself the number-one suspect.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Hank: a timeless chuckle for families everywhere.
- By The Super-duper Amazing Silver Golem on 03-16-16
By: John R. Erickson
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Born a Crime
- Stories from a South African Childhood
- By: Trevor Noah
- Narrated by: Trevor Noah
- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 213,365
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 193,071
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Story5 out of 5 stars 192,100
In this award-winning Audible Studios production, Trevor Noah tells his wild coming-of-age tale during the twilight of apartheid in South Africa. It’s a story that begins with his mother throwing him from a moving van to save him from a potentially fatal dispute with gangsters, then follows the budding comedian’s path to self-discovery through episodes both poignant and comical.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Great book and perfect narration
- By MarilynArms on 12-15-16
By: Trevor Noah
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Slaughterhouse-Five
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: James Franco
- Length: 5 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 18,556
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 16,594
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 16,569
Traumatized by the bombing of Dresden at the time he had been imprisoned, Pilgrim drifts through all events and history, sometimes deeply implicated, sometimes a witness. He is surrounded by Vonnegut's usual large cast of continuing characters (notably here the hack science fiction writer Kilgore Trout and the alien Tralfamadorians, who oversee his life and remind him constantly that there is no causation, no order, no motive to existence).
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4 out of 5 stars
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Don't Quit Your Daytime Job, James
- By Keith on 11-20-15
By: Kurt Vonnegut
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Hot White Heist 2
- By: Adam Goldman
- Narrated by: Bowen Yang, Jane Lynch, Cynthia Nixon, and others
- Length: 2 hrs and 38 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 245
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 239
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 239
Two years after successfully melting down the top secret sperm bank under the Space Needle, the CLITO collective (Community of Lesbians Inclusive To Others) is thriving on their newly acquired private island, Lesbos 2. All is well in their queer utopia. Or is it? Investigative reporter Sarah Keebler (Sarah Steele) is piecing together the crew's previous heist for her bombshell true-crime podcast–and getting dangerously close to the truth.
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5 out of 5 stars
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AS FUN AS SEASON1
- By Robert on 03-07-24
By: Adam Goldman
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Napoleon's Hemorrhoids…And Other Small Events That Changed History
- By: Phil Mason
- Narrated by: LJ Ganser
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 1,093
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 969
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Story4 out of 5 stars 965
Hilarious, fascinating, and a roller coaster of dizzying, historical what-ifs, Napoleon's Hemorrhoids is a potpourri for serious historians and casual history buffs. In one of Phil Mason's many revelations, you'll learn that Communist jets were two minutes away from opening fire on American planes during the Cuban missile crisis, when they had to turn back as they were running out of fuel. You'll discover that before the Battle of Waterloo, Napoleon's painful hemorrhoids prevented him from mounting his horse to survey the battlefield.
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3 out of 5 stars
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They just throw the facts too fast
- By Concerned_llama on 12-11-20
By: Phil Mason
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Heads Will Roll
- By: Kate McKinnon, Emily Lynne
- Narrated by: Kate McKinnon, Emily Lynne, Tim Gunn, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 6 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 17,202
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 15,674
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Story4 out of 5 stars 15,608
Heads Will Roll is an Audible Original from Saturday Night Live star Kate McKinnon and her cocreator/costar (and real-life sister) Emily Lynne. Produced by Broadway Video, this is not an audiobook - it’s a 10-episode, star-studded audio comedy that features performances from Meryl Streep, Tim Gunn, Peter Dinklage, Queer Eye’s Fab Five, and so many more. Please note: This content is not for kids.
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5 out of 5 stars
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More like this please
- By Anon893 on 05-03-19
By: Kate McKinnon, and others
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I Can't Make This Up
- Life Lessons
- By: Neil Strauss - contributor, Kevin Hart
- Narrated by: Kevin Hart
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 55,714
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 50,194
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 49,938
Superstar comedian and Hollywood box-office star Kevin Hart turns his immense talent to the written word by writing some words. Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have the funniest, most heartfelt, and most inspirational memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself since Old Yeller.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Best Audiobook I Ever Listened To
- By Sam Clear on 07-13-17
By: Neil Strauss - contributor, and others
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French & Saunders Titting About (Series 5)
- By: Dawn French, Jennifer Saunders
- Narrated by: Dawn French, Jennifer Saunders
- Length: 3 hrs and 1 min
- Original Recording
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 9
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 9
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Story5 out of 5 stars 9
Once again, the legendary comedy duo unearth six vitally important subjects... and then tit about about them. From surviving on a desert island to being eaten by a cardboard crocodile, Dawn and Jennifer will entertain, inform and thoroughly tit about for your pleasure. (Batteries not included.)
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5 out of 5 stars
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Please do more
- By Mr P Ellerington on 04-23-24
By: Dawn French, and others
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The Heron
- By: Don Winslow
- Narrated by: Ed Harris
- Length: 1 hr and 6 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 5,001
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 4,611
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 4,586
“The Heron” is the nickname a big-city accountant has attached to himself in his new home near San Diego, where he’s using the alias to avoid a hit man who may be after him. It seems a former client believes that The Heron has skipped town with several million dollars not his own. Don Winslow’s ensuing, entertaining yarn is by turns twisty, dark, and comical as we observe the delicate dance between the pursuer and the pursued.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Awfully long middle for such a short story
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 07-29-22
By: Don Winslow
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Brackish Waters
- By: Matt Boren
- Narrated by: Christina Applegate
- Length: 1 hr and 55 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 4,276
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 3,945
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 3,904
When Kate wins an item at her children’s elementary school auction - an all-inclusive trip to SeaView at Sandpiper Bay - she thinks it’s just what her family needs after a decade of career disappointments and a marriage on its last legs. She has no reason to believe that said trip is a Fyre Festival-level fraud and, in fact, the catalyst to her unraveling. But it is. Oh, but it is.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Christina Applegate is everything
- By Julie on 03-21-21
By: Matt Boren
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Monsters and How to Tame Them
- By: Kevin Hart
- Narrated by: Kevin Hart
- Length: 5 hrs and 37 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 1,874
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 1,670
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Story5 out of 5 stars 1,663
Monsters and How to Tame Them is Kevin’s most recent guide on how to live your best life, wrapped in his signature honesty, hilarious voice, and adept storytelling. You’ve heard stories about vampires, zombies, and ghosts. Now it’s time to meet some of the monsters that haunt your mind.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Entertaining, not useful
- By Anonymous User on 09-18-22
By: Kevin Hart