Einstein and the Nuclear Space Dolphins vs. the Terrorist Comet Armageddon

By: Matthew Fish

Narrated by: J.T. Bowne

Length: 4 hrs and 10 mins

Publisher's summary

In the near-but-not-too-distant future, a group of six comets threaten to both strike and destroy all of America. It is up to a small group of White House officials, an unfrozen Einstein, a Japanese/American fisherman from Florida, a dolphin trainer, and an incredibly smart Asian child to save the day with their plan to launch nuclear armed dolphins into space to intercept the comet assault before time runs out and all of America is lost to deadly explosions and fire.

This book is a work of very serious comedy - which explores the possibility of a one day comet attack and the very serious implications it could have on our society. Dick.

Disclaimer: This book contains very descriptive acts of humorous sexual situations and somewhat offensive words like "rake-f--king", and "clown titties". It is also borderline retarded. However, take into consideration that it is not nice to make fun of retarded people. They aren't retarded, they are special - you asshole.

©2011 Matthew Fish (P)2016 Matthew Fish

It is stupid, but hilarious

This is the dumbest book I’ve ever been through.

Einstein and the Nuclear Space Dolphins vs. the Terrorist Comet Armageddon written by Matthew Fish, is a satiric and humorous story about how the world is saved from a pending comet strike on Earth, threatening to wipe out North America. In order to save face, the US government tells the public that it is nukes from Iranian terrorists. And their best way to solve the problem, is to get their greatest mind on the case, thus they thaw Einstein from cryo-stasis and asks him to solve the problem. Einstein gets the help of other completely out of place characters, and together they try to save the day!

The story is bonkers and way over the top, and the book is filled with completely black humor. It is extremely sexist, has loads of swearing, and breaks the fourth wall on numerous occasions, so if that is not your thing, stay away. It doesn’t try to take itself serious though, and it actually succeeds in doing so much of the time. Had it been the occasional dark remark, then it wouldn’t have worked, but the jokes and humor just kept on coming, and it held my focus that way. That being said, I did feel that after the first quarter of the book, the jokes were somewhat repetitive, and mid way there was an obscene amount of low level sexist jokes, which was quite boring. But other than way too many penis/boobs jokes, it was a fun ride, which made me laught out loud on multiple occasions simply because of how stupid the story was.

I listened to the audiobook, which was narrated by J.T. Bowne, who did a great job. He was clear and was wonderfully engaged to the point of being slightly over the top, which just fit the writing. He had very, very good voices, so overall a joy to listen to.

All in all, if far out and over the line dark humor is your thing, then you will likely enjoy it. If not, chances are that it definitely isn’t your thing. Don’t go into it for the story, but the humor. I laughed out loud multiple times, and I am usually not into comedies, so take that as appraisal. It was the dumbest book I’ve ever listened to, but it worked much of the time. This is definitely not a masterpiece, but it is surprisingly also not the worst book I’ve come across.

I received this audiobook for free in return for a review. I have no affiliation with the author, the narrator, the publisher, or their pets (Although I am sure the latter are quite nice!).