• You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning

  • By: Celia Rivenbark
  • Narrated by: Celia Rivenbark
  • Length: 3 hrs and 55 mins
  • 4.3 out of 5 stars (144 ratings)

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You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning  By  cover art

You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning

By: Celia Rivenbark
Narrated by: Celia Rivenbark
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Publisher's summary

From the author of the best-selling classics We're Just Like You, Only Prettier and Bless Your Heart, Tramp comes a collection of essays so funny, you'll shoot co'cola out of your nose.

Topics include such gems as:

  • Why Miss North Carolina is too nice to hate
  • How Gwyneth Paltrow wants to improve your pathetic life
  • Strapped for cash? Try cat whispering
  • Sex every night for a year? How do you wrap that?
  • Get yer Wassail on: It's carolin' time
  • Airlines serving up one hot mess
  • Action figure Jesus
  • Why Clay Aiken ain't marrying your glandular daughter
  • And much more!

    Complete with a treasure trove of Celia's genuine southern recipes, You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning is sure to appeal to anyone who lives south of something.

  • ©2009 Celia Rivenbark (P)2009 Macmillan Audio

    What listeners say about You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning

    Average customer ratings
    Overall
    • 4.5 out of 5 stars
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    Performance
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    Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.

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    • Overall
      5 out of 5 stars
    • Performance
      5 out of 5 stars
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      5 out of 5 stars

    So good!

    Like an old friend telling you about her day. It's Southern humor at its best, I listen to it at night. It reminds me of home.

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    1 person found this helpful

    • Overall
      3 out of 5 stars
    • Performance
      3 out of 5 stars
    • Story
      3 out of 5 stars

    Great, but unoriginal

    What was your reaction to the ending? (No spoilers please!)

    Nothing to spoil, it's not a normal story, each chapter is it's on standalone story; it was as though she wrote a newspaper column for each chapter.

    Did the narration match the pace of the story?

    I noticed other people complained about her pace, but I didn't take any issue with that really; she could have paced a little better with the punch lines I guess. What bothered me was that it sounded to me like she had a speech impediment of some kind that started to wear on me.

    Was You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning worth the listening time?

    Sure, but at this point, 2015, a lot of her stuff is a little dated, so if I had to do it all over again, I probably wouldn't have.

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    3 people found this helpful

    • Overall
      4 out of 5 stars
    • Performance
      5 out of 5 stars
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      4 out of 5 stars

    Very good, light hearted fun!

    If you like southern sarcasm, here you go. I would LOVE to have lunch with Celia, she says what we all wish we'd thought of!

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    • Overall
      5 out of 5 stars
    • Performance
      3 out of 5 stars
    • Story
      5 out of 5 stars

    Will Read her others myself!

    Enjoyed the book with her witty sarcasm and outlook on everyday happenings, but the author is not the best reader. I got used to it but she doesn't do a lot of inflection and it's more just reading. I enjoyed the book and will read the others she wrote. I bought a different one for each of my 3 best friends and we will exchange them and have loads of laughs!

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    • Overall
      3 out of 5 stars
    • Performance
      4 out of 5 stars
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      3 out of 5 stars

    Funny enough

    What did you like best about You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning? What did you like least?

    I laughed at her humor a lot. but the book was more of a humor column in a paper than a book.

    How would you have changed the story to make it more enjoyable?

    A plot?

    What about Celia Rivenbark’s performance did you like?

    It was her book, so she knew where to put emphasis. I like that.

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    1 person found this helpful

    • Overall
      5 out of 5 stars
    • Performance
      5 out of 5 stars
    • Story
      5 out of 5 stars

    How close is the next gas station???

    Where does You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

    It is one of those that I reload to listen to. This happens to be a rare quality with books for me. Once I have read/ listened to a book, it takes something magical for me to reread/ reload a book.

    What was one of the most memorable moments of You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning?

    I enjoyed the "Perfect Attendance" story since I am a school teacher in a school that strongly promotes "perfect attendance." So it hit home. I also enjoyed the Christmas story. I laughed so hard during that one.

    Have you listened to any of Celia Rivenbark’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

    Yes, I just love the narration!

    Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

    I enjoyed the "Perfect Attendance" story since I am a school teacher in a school that strongly promotes "perfect attendance." So it hit home. I also enjoyed the Christmas story. I laughed so hard during that one.

    Any additional comments?

    I listen to my audiobooks while driving in my car. I drive three hours to Memphis on a regular basis. I chose this book because I have read the print version of other books by her. I was laughing so hard, I was looking for the next gas station.

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    1 person found this helpful

    • Overall
      5 out of 5 stars
    • Performance
      5 out of 5 stars
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      5 out of 5 stars

    Hilarious

    Absolutely hilarious! I would highly recommend this book to anyone looking for a quick light read.

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    • Overall
      5 out of 5 stars
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      5 out of 5 stars
    • Story
      5 out of 5 stars

    Wear your Depends, Ladies!

    This book should come with a warning label: If you are a female reader of a certain age, do not read this book without taking proper precautions! Depends--those full coverage ones--should be worn while reading, especially outside One's own home! You WILL pee your pants, laughing!

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    1 person found this helpful

    • Overall
      5 out of 5 stars
    • Performance
      5 out of 5 stars
    • Story
      5 out of 5 stars

    Loads of laughs!

    I love that Celia reads this to us. It makes it all that more personable. A wonderful way to escape from a hard day!

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    • Overall
      5 out of 5 stars
    • Performance
      5 out of 5 stars
    • Story
      5 out of 5 stars

    A Very Funny Book

    Where does You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

    One of the top Picks.

    What about Celia Rivenbark’s performance did you like?

    She has a great way of telling her story. You feel like you were there.

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