Hi. I'm Jimmy Loram. But you don't really care who I am, do you? You're here to laugh and be entertained. Why else would you buy a book titled We Should Rename Chicken Fried Steak: Observations from the Brain Crevices, Volume 1? It's not like you thought, "I really need help getting organized," or "I really need to change careers - Hey! This chicken fried steak book might help!"
Many of the following non sequiturs are from my own brain, or are sparked by something I read or someone's writing that I've rewritten so I can claim it as my own. For instance: As a man, do you pee into the water or onto the ceramic sculpture in the center of the fountain in the park? Followed by something about cheese. And it goes on like this all day long. Enjoy!