Braineater Jones

By: Stephen Kozeniewski

Narrated by: Steve Rimpici

Length: 5 hrs and 55 mins

Publisher's Summary

Braineater Jones wakes up face down in a swimming pool with no memory of his former life, how he died, or why he's now a zombie. With a smart-aleck severed head as a partner, Jones descends into the undead ghetto to solve his own murder. But Jones' investigation is complicated by his crippling addiction to human flesh. Like all walking corpses, he discovers that only a stiff drink can soothe his cravings.

Unfortunately, finding liquor during Prohibition is costly and dangerous. From his Mason jar, the cantankerous Old Man rules the only speakeasy in the city that caters to the postmortem crowd. As the booze, blood, and clues coagulate, Jones gets closer to discovering the identity of his killer and the secrets behind the city's stranglehold on liquid spirits. Death couldn't stop him, but if the liquor dries up, the entire city will be plunged into an orgy of cannibalism. Cracking this case is a tall order. Braineater Jones won't get out alive, but if he plays his cards right, he might manage to salvage the last scraps of his humanity.

©2014 Stephen Kozeniewski (P)2014 Stephen Kozeniewski

Leave your zombie prejudices at home

Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

The author has created a world that is absurd and dark. If you like the noir genre and enjoy all things zombie then this is right up your alley.

What was one of the most memorable moments of Braineater Jones?

The zombie brothel. Use your imagination.

What about Steve Rimpici’s performance did you like?

His accent was perfect for the stereotypical noir hard boiled PI. And his voices for the Boss and his minion were bang on.

Who was the most memorable character of Braineater Jones and why?

Aside from Jones obviously... "The Head" was awesome! But that Kumarie! She was such a bitch! And by the time her crazy became obvious it was just a little too late...

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

The Zombie Detective

If you could sum up Braineater Jones in three words, what would they be?

Gory dark humor

Which scene was your favorite?

Aside from the zombie brothel, there is a particularly disturbing sex scene *cringe*

Who was the most memorable character of Braineater Jones and why?

Braineater Jones of course! Alcibe the talking head is a close second.

Any additional comments?

Steve Rimpici was AMAZING as the narrator in this. He has an amazing voice, and each character has it's own accent. He really brings this story to life.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

Hard-Boiled Braineater

What did you love best about Braineater Jones?

Braineater Jones is so steeped in the hard-boiled detective genre of the mid-twentieth century it pays homage to, you might say it is saturated. The tone, the characters, the dialogue, it all feels so pulpy in its approach, the addition of zombies doesn't seem like so far a stretch.

Who was your favorite character and why?

Alcibe the talking zombie head kind of stole the show in a lot of scenes in which he was featured. From the get-go as he introduced himself to Braineater Jones and demonstrated his tenaciousness to escape his prison of a jar by basically wobbling about on his neck stump, I was pretty much on board with Alcibe. and credit to Steve Rimpici for a great voice attributed to Alcibe, as well. Loved it.

What about Steve Rimpici’s performance did you like?

Aside from Alcibe, Steve Rimpici's range of voices for this story was great. While Braineater Jones' gruff private-eye voice dominated much of the story, that was fine by me. Maybe you remember Bob Hoskins as Eddie Valiant in 'Who Framed Roger Rabbit'. That stalky, tough-as-nails, broken-glass-as-chewing-gum kind of voice is, dare I say, trumped by Rimpici's gravelly delivery as Braineater Jones.

If you could take any character from Braineater Jones out to dinner, who would it be and why?

It's hard to think of one, as the human characters had a tendency to be pretty mean, and the zombies when driven to brain-munching would likely see ME as dinner.

Any additional comments?

A wholly entertaining experience with tremendous voice-acting that lifts up what few shortcomings may come from a story that involves so much genre mashing.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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Where does Braineater Jones rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

Braineater Jones is in the top 10 books that I have listened to in the last 6 months. Its unusual story line kept me entertained the entire story.

Which character – as performed by Steve Rimpici – was your favorite?

I really liked the main character, Braineater Jones, the best. He was written and Mr. Rimpici made him sound like he was of the 30's era.

Any additional comments?

I came into this book not exactly sure what to expect. As a rule, I don't really do zombie stories. Braineater Jones had a great mystery plot to it that made the fact that he was the undead something I enjoyed. Mr. Rimpici made all of the characters feel alive (ha) and right there with you. He was perfectly cast as the narrator of this book.

I would highly recommend this book to my friends who like their stories a little out there. I would love to listen to more of Mr. Rimpici's work.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

I wish this voice artist read every audiobook!

If you could sum up Braineater Jones in three words, what would they be?

Funny, clever and endearing.

Any additional comments?

I bought this book after hearing a sample of the narration. I usually prefer to read books in print but the voices Steve Rimpici creates for each character are overwhelmingly impressive. I've listened to plenty of audiobooks but none even comes close enough to compare to the entertainment quality Rimpici brings to Braineater Jones. While not my typical reading genre, the story is unique and I truly enjoyed it. The author is crazy clever with all of the language of the period and amusing moments. That being said, I would probably listen to this guy read the dictionary. I'm hooked and I hope to see much more work from both the author and the voice artist. I found myself laughing out loud throughout. I was quite wowed.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

Zombie Noir

So, Noir may not be my thing. I generally enjoyed this book but it wasn't something I felt the need to devour. It has the added elements of zombies, not a favorite but not something I loathe. This book turned out to be a very pleasant surprise. Extremely creative concept, who who would have thought to combine the two genres?

Braineater is a very likeable fellow, for a zombie. I really enjoyed his narrative, terrific engaging character. I found myself routing for him all the way. Who can resist a tough guy detective?

This book has that AMC feel to it, felt like I was reading a James Cagney movie! I love the whole atmosphere. Not my favorite era, but very entertaining. Definitely not a happy time to be a lady, I probably would have decked somebody! But other than that, and I was warned by the author, all was good.

I listened to the audiobook narrated by Steve Rimpici, who really fits the book. He has a great voice for noir, just the right old-timey feel. I loved the pace of the read, it really moved through the whole book, both action and descriptive sections. I would definitely look into more of his reads. I wonder if he has any romances out there? His voice has just enough rasp to make it smexy!

The mystery was intriguing, even if it did not go the way I expected. I did not hate the twist, just felt it was a bit left field. All things considered Mr Kozeniewski penned a pretty great book and chose the perfect narrator to bring it to life!

Disclosure - I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All thoughts, opinions and ratings are my own.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

Great characters, voicing and story, lacks editing

Kozeniewski's Brian Eater Jones is an excellent take on the noir genre. While I came into this somewhat expecting yet another "me too" zombie apocalypse novel, what I found was something that was completely different than anything else I've read (or listened to) before. Instead the story takes place in a world were dead people sometimes come back to life and continue "living".

Brain Eater Jones is a good mix of comedy, period accurate slang and characters, and a good dose of mystery and intrigue as well.

Specifically referring to Steve Rimpici's performance, I found that his character voices, especially for that of the main character, were spot on perfect. I really felt like I was listening to someone from the 1930's. The other characters were often cartoonish, but this was clearly intentional, and adds to the silliness of the story in a very positive and clearly intentional way.

The only thing that holds this back from being full 5 stars were some editing issues that occurred throughout the book. Specifically, there seems to be almost no break at all between sentences and paragraphs. I don't know if this was done intentionally or not, but it often forced me to go back and repeat sections because details just flew by faster than I could really process them in my brain. At other points, the characters might all move to a different place and time and all without even half a second of pause. That, and I did notice a few times where a lines repeats itself.

Editing issues aside, this book is definitely a good listen, and I found once I got used to the pacing, I was able to follow along better through the second half of the book.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

revenant noir

I loved this. It's a fun twist on a zombie story, set in the hardboiled detective noir genre. The narration was spot-on, smooth and deadpan and with the right amount of grit and sarcasm. The main character wakes up dead without any memory of who he was in his previous living life, enters into a new kind of segregated life (the walking dead and the breathers) , gets suckered by a dame into a big con, and has to unravel the mystery of the con and, of course, who killed him. The whole book is hilarious and the mystery kept me guessing. There are some pretty gross details and lots of 1930/1940's slang. The writing is tight and hip. It's like The Big Sleep woke up and kept telling his story.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

VERY Enjoyable and Hilarious

Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

Yes I would definitely recommend this book to my friends. This book is a great mash up of fun and seriousness. I laughed out loud so many times! And even though I received this audiobook free of charge in exchange for an unbiased review I found it extremely entertaining.

What did you like best about this story?

I liked the way the book stayed with its theme. It had good flow. Jones doesn't remember how he became a zombie, so he becomes a private eye or head. I love the 'pickled Boss in a jar'. I think it was chapter 19 he repeats a line when he was going underground to see the Boss when he says "You get that little jar of crap and bring it up here".

What about Steve Rimpici’s performance did you like?

Everything! Steve Rimpici is a Voice Wizard! Every character had a great distintion.

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

Yes but there were places that were so funny I had to listen to it again.

Any additional comments?

Stephen Kozeniewski is a terrific author and Steve Rimpici was perfect with the voices and I hope to see more of Braineater Jones! I'm not being overly generous with 5 stars either. I think it's well deserved.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

Braineater Jones an unlikely zombie savior?

4.75 out of 5 stars

Waking up without your memory is a real buzzkill. Waking up without your buzzkill to realize that you’ve crossed over to the other side is really confusing. Braineater Jones awakens facedown in a pool having no idea who he is or how he came to die. He vows to find out who he was and who killed him. Along the way, he finds friends in unlikely places (and unlikely forms) and starts up a little detective business.

The narration for Braineater Jones was done by Steve Rimpici and he does a really great job. He had that perfect “noir” voice for Jones. The few times that the scenes required it, he was able to switch his voice to show what Jones was going through and how he was feeling. I really enjoyed Rimpici’s narration and he definitely made the book more entertaining than it already was.

I honestly was not sure how I was going to feel about this book. I really went into it with the thought that I wasn’t going to enjoy it, but boy was I wrong. I usually don’t love noir or time pieces, but I really enjoyed this. I was able to transport myself back in time because of how well Kozeniewski wrote. Yes, there were sometimes that language or themes might bug some people (but the author warns you of these at the very beginning).

I just kept going back to this book. It kept sucking me in and making me want to figure out more and more about Jones’ new and former life. It was written in such a way that I had to figure out what happened.

If you enjoy older noir-like fiction, zombie main characters, or an old school private eye type of a story, look no further than Braineater Jones.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful