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If at Birth You Don't Succeed Audiobook

If at Birth You Don't Succeed: My Adventures with Disaster and Destiny

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Publisher's Summary

Comedian Zach Anner opens his frank and devilishly funny book, If at Birth You Don't Succeed, with an admission: He botched his own birth. Two months early, underweight and underprepared for life, he entered the world with cerebral palsy and an uncertain future. So how did this hairless mole rat of a boy blossom into a viral Internet sensation who's hosted two travel shows, impressed Oprah, driven the Mars Rover, and inspired a John Mayer song? (It wasn't "Your Body is a Wonderland".)

Zach lives by the mantra: When life gives you a wheelchair, make lemonade. Whether recounting a valiant childhood attempt to woo Cindy Crawford, encounters with zealous faith healers, or the time he crapped his pants mere feet from Dr. Phil, Zach shares his fumbles with unflinching honesty and characteristic charm. By his 30th birthday, Zach had grown into an adult with a career in entertainment, millions of fans, a loving family, and friends who would literally carry him up mountains.

If at Birth You Don't Succeed is a hilariously irreverent and heartfelt memoir about finding your passion and your path even when it's paved with epic misadventure. This is the unlikely but not unlucky story of a man who couldn't safely open a bag of Skittles but still became a fitness guru with fans around the world. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll fall in love with the Olive Garden all over again and learn why cerebral palsy is, definitively, "the sexiest of the palsies".

©2016 Zachary Dean Anner (P)2016 Macmillan Audio

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

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Performance
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  •  
    Zachary D Anner 04-07-16 Member Since 2015
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    "Zach A."

    I thought I did pretty well, to be honest. But I guess I'm kind of biased.

    72 of 74 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Basil Sands 04-21-16
    Basil Sands 04-21-16
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    "Review from a professional narrator"
    What about Zach Anner’s performance did you like?

    Not often can an author of a book be their own narrator. In this case though, no one could have read this book the way Zach does. His comedic timing is excellent. His tone in the serious parts held me close to the story. In general, I found it well done in all aspects. As one who does narration for a living all I can say is, Great Job!


    Any additional comments?

    Funny, Poignant, Eye Opening, and over all well done. Highly recommended.

    9 of 9 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Patrick Hart 04-12-16 Member Since 2015
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    "Unbridled Positivity"

    I was late to the Zach Anner fan club, so by the time I knew anything of his body of work, his book was already slated for release the next month. I found that he was just as hilarious as he was endearing. As the pretty much negative person as I am, I found his optimism and positivity void of the preachy nature I find most folk with such enthusiasm; which made me love him even more.

    I had no idea what to expect from his book, just that I was sure I would laugh along with him and his particular brand of humor. What I found in listening to him speak about his life, was that his honest heartfelt nature nearly brought me to tears many times, not because of anything to do with his disability, but because of his overcoming a very real problem we all face at junctures in our lives; despair.

    I needed this book. I've spent most of my life waiting for something so profoundly positive to happen to fill the chasm of negativity I had dug for myself, never even stopping to think that I could simply make the conscious choice to be more positive. As cliché as it seems, there is truth in that sometimes the easiest solutions are the hardest ones to see.

    Though I may never get to thank him in person, and he'll more than likely never read this, I would like to thank him. So thanks Zach, a million times over, you are an amazing human being.

    3 of 3 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Daryl Edmonton, Alberta, Canada 05-21-16
    Daryl Edmonton, Alberta, Canada 05-21-16
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    "READ THIS BOOK!"

    I listened to this book as fast as I could. It's funny (OK, hilarious), irreverent in places, poignant in others. Zach neither lets himself be defined by his physical limitations nor glosses over them and pretends his life is easy. As a woman with a disability (admittedly different from Zach's), I found myself agreeing with him on many fine points of disability etiquette, nuance, and finding your way.
    A piece of advice, though: do NOT listen to this book on the bus; you'll be laughing so hard that people will look at you funny...

    5 of 6 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Kerry Hall 03-29-16
    Kerry Hall 03-29-16
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    "Inspiring and hilarious. Glad I heard it from him."

    Glad I heard it in his voice. His delivery was great and gave me lots of feels. "I'm ashamed of the Retard!" Hilarious!

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  •  
    chelsey 03-29-16
    chelsey 03-29-16
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    "Refreshing read"

    This book is hilarious. I feel like Zach is my close friend after reading this book. Great job Zach!

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Aidan 03-28-16
    Aidan 03-28-16
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    "Yes, yes, 1000 yesses!"

    A beautiful set of stories read by a beautiful man. Zach rules! Thought-provoking, emotional, inspiring.

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
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    Emily 03-28-16
    Emily 03-28-16
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    "Amazing!!"

    perfect. this book is perfect. I've been going through a lot in my life and able to hear this honest life retrospective from such a funny and positive person has been amazing! if he does go in to write another book I would listen to it in a heart beat. but for now I will just have to make due with listening to this again.

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
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    Caitlen Hudak 03-25-16 Member Since 2017
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    "Wonderous"

    A life story that ebbed and flowed with authenticity and an honest humor.
    Especially enjoyable if you interrupt a chpater now and then with a trip to Youtube to watch an episode of Workout Wed or Top of the Monday

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
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    Kassandre Harper-Cotton 03-24-16 Member Since 2015
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    "Life Is What You Make It"
    What made the experience of listening to If at Birth You Don't Succeed the most enjoyable?

    I first became aware of Zach Anner online in one of his Workout Wednesday videos. To be honest, my first thoughts were, "Why are they making this poor man crawl on a treadmill?" This video led me to Zach Anner's Youtube channel--and what a journey. His book describes perfectly the bias that I showed towards him. I saw the wheelchair first and failed to note that he is utterly and completely fearless. He is a comedian. He wants companionship. He adores his friends. He is loyal. He is creative. And...by the way...he happens to have "the sexiest of the palsies". Initially, you focus on how Anner overcomes some of his limitations; but, the book quickly draws you in with a larger message. Life is what you make it--you can sit around and wait for things to happen or you can use your God-given ingenuity and create a life that you love.


    What was one of the most memorable moments of If at Birth You Don't Succeed?

    Without spoiling it for future readers, I really enjoyed the college memoirs and childhood stories.


    What about Zach Anner’s performance did you like?

    This book could ONLY be told by Anner.


    2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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