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Publisher's Summary

Tina Fey’s Bossypants meets David Carr’s The Night of the Gun in Darrell Hammond's groundbreaking memoir, God, If You’re Not up There, I’m F*cked - a raw look inside the troubled life and mind of an American comic genius. 

By turns poignant and hilarious, Hammond takes listeners from the set of Saturday Night Live, where he was the show’s longest tenured cast member, to the drug-ridden streets of Harlem and into the twisting corridors of his own unflaggingly humorous consciousness. Mingling behind-the-scenes stories from television’s best loved comedy series with a dark look inside a world-class funnyman, God, If You’re Not up There, I’m F*cked is a book sure to resonate with anyone who shares a talent for performance, a love of comedy, or a desire to know how an artist can climb from the deepest despair to the very top of his profession.

To hear Hammond tell stories from the book, live from New York’s Comedy Cellar, check out That’s Clinton!, also available on Audible. 

©2011 Darrell Hammond (P)2018 Audible, Inc.

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What members say

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  • Overall
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  • Karen
  • Connecticut, U.S.
  • 08-12-18

A "must listen" for Hammond fans

A few years ago, I started reading "God, If You're Not There" on my Kindle. I abandoned it after a few pages, shocked by the dissonance between my image of Darrell Hammond and the reality. (Naive, I know.) Last week, when Audible released the audiobook narrated by the author, I decided to give this book another try. I'm glad I did.

"God, If You're Not There" is about Darrell Hammond's life, both the highs and the lows. He describes his struggle with mental illness, addiction, and abuse at the hands of his parents... that's difficult to listen to (and must have been difficult to narrate). But he also describes his career and includes several of his wonderful comedic impressions. He recounts his experiences from Saturday Night Live (which I absolutely loved, as an SNL fan), and notes that he refers fans to s Washington Post article in response to "Why aren't you playing Donald Trump anymore?"

The book also describes Hammond's recovery from addiction and finding peace. For me, this was the most satisfying part of the book. A very interesting audiobook by and about this talented comedian. Highly recommended!

6 of 6 people found this review helpful

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Life changing.

This is a fantastic book. I’d recommend it over the actual book because Darrell Hammond is so damn good at voices. He does something amazing to imbue the mood of any situation into his voice, and then adds the characters flawlessly.

But that’s just the surface. The story of his life, in the context of living with severe mental illness and struggling to find peace, is something that needs to be shared. This book had a permanent impact on my life and how I see others.

2 of 3 people found this review helpful

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Fabulous

Darrell Hammond epitomizes what can be great about recovery. This book is interesting, funny, honest and encouraging. Highly recommend ‼️

1 of 2 people found this review helpful

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Very entertaining and funny Guy

Hammond’s voice, the tone suggests a sense of disregard, disrespect and even ingratitude. As if he dislikes everything, which may not even be a valid sentiment and is definitely part of his exceeding talent. But he sounds so jaded, even disgusted by life and unhappy with everyone, even himself. He speaks with an ascetic and sarcastic tone as if he feels compelled to cynically mock everyone and everything.

Interestingly, the very same talent, the source of his success has made addiction recovery hard for him. Abandoning cynicism, sarcasm and mockery, at least when not performing, is fundamental to recovery from addiction. To believe in things that are not tangible, concepts like God, Higher Powers, honesty, willingness, open-mindedness acknowledgement, accountability, confession of character flaws that’s all hard stuff for drug possessed, egotistical, driven, cynical, sarcastic and successful comedians. In his voice, I hear ego, pessimism and mockery not humility or gratitude. I just can’t get bogged down by that right now. I just can’t hear any genuine consideration, care or appreciation in his voice. It could be me? I think I “get” Daryl Hammond, wow! I am impressed by him and amazed by what he has done in his career. I just don’t want more of his “thing” right now, I need less!

2 of 4 people found this review helpful

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Remarkable.

Wow. Mr. Hammond, what a remarkable journey. I had no idea. Thank you for sharing it.

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  • Jason
  • Toronto, ON, Canada
  • 08-17-18

FINALLY IT'S HERE! LOVED IT!!!!

I've been waiting for this book to come out in audiobook for ages. This was an absolutely fascinating and completely insane story. I have so much admiration for this guy. A nuclear brick wall fell on him and he came through it with heart and humour intact. No easy feat, I can only imagine. I wish he would have gone into more detail about his mother. There needs to be an entire book about their relationship that details what happened to her in early life. I really wanted to understand more about what made her the way she was and how she led such a double life. It reminded me of Sybil a little. Anyway, aside from that it's such a joy to hear all his impressions. He really is an artist with his voice. I really enjoyed this.

1 of 2 people found this review helpful

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Incredible story!

How did Darrell Hammond stay alive? Brilliantly combines humor, pathos, pain, sadness and insight to tell a story and reveal a life of unimaginable abuse and how he escapes from it. We all share his tale in some way. His honesty and openness can truly inspire others.

0 of 1 people found this review helpful