The Assertiveness Guide for Women

How to Communicate Your Needs, Set Healthy Boundaries, and Transform Your Relationships

By: Julie de Azevedo Hanks PhD LCSW

Narrated by: Rebecca Roberts

Length: 5 hrs and 21 mins

Publisher's summary

Isn't it time you took a stand? Many women struggle with assertiveness, but if you're prone to anxiety and avoidance, it is especially difficult. Grounded in attachment theory, this essential guide will help you identify your thoughts and feelings, balance your emotions, communicate your needs, and set healthy boundaries to improve your life.

When you're assertive, you're able to communicate your needs and wishes clearly while respecting yourself and anyone else involved in the interaction. But when you aren't assertive, you may stop yourself from saying anything when your needs aren't being met, or end up lashing out in hostile or hurtful ways. People with different attachment styles struggle with being assertive for different reasons, and even women with a secure attachment style may have difficulty expressing emotion when faced with challenging circumstances.

Using strategies based in mindfulness, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), The Assertiveness Guide for Women can help you understand the attachment styles that keep you from asserting yourself. You'll learn about the three communication stances - from the passive Doormat to the aggressive (or passive-aggressive) Sword to the assertive Lantern - and find practical examples that show you how to apply your new communication and emotional awareness skills in your own life. Rather than being caught in a cycle of rumination and regret when you're unable to express yourself or even acknowledge your own needs, you'll be ready to assert yourself and get what you want.

Whether you're anxious and overwhelmed by the intensity of your emotions, avoidant and struggle to identify your emotions, or otherwise have difficulty expressing yourself, this book will help you become more aware of your own thoughts and feelings, and empower you to ask for what you need, set boundaries, and speak your truth for a more fulfilling life.

©2016 Julie de Azevedo Hanks (P)2016 Wetware Media

Worth the read

Helpful suggestions and use of personal examples. Worth purchasing and relistening to. Glad I got it

This book spoke to me on a lot of levels

I really enjoyed this book. I especially liked the authors own stories about her family life and struggles with an anxious attachment style. It made me feel hopeful that my fears will melt away as I make different empowering choices. The tools for advocating were supported with a background in attachment styles and helpful metaphors for communication.

Excellent

Just what I needed to hear. If you are looking for a book that invites you to introspection, this is it. It has clear examples, analogies and things to try out. Plenty to learn and implement.

A gift

I’m so grateful Julie posted about this book on her instagram page. I am excited to put these life changing communication techniques into practice

Simple, precise, specific for contemporary women

I am so grateful to have found this book right now. I have never really educated myself on emotional intelligence. This book is thorough without being overwhelming. It makes the listener feel very hopeful at the possibility of overcoming the challenges of being assertive as a woman when society and family dynamics have discouraged such skills in women. I suppose I feel kind of behind not knowing about any of these concepts (they seem so simple and to have so much potential to transform ones life) but the writing and the delivery of the book is so unpretentious, non judge mental and hopeful. It actually makes me excited to work on some of the areas of my life that I have been avoiding to hear the writer talk about it so positively and with such ease. I recently ended my relationship of 3 years because I was simple unable to ask for what I needed then I would have outbursts of anger when my life wasn't the way I wanted it - I'm hoping to learn a lot from this book and make some necessary changes.

Worth it!

This is an amazing book, I highly recommend it. It has changed my perspective on the concept of assertiveness.

So eye-opening!

This book really helped me understand myself better and become more aware of my interactions with others. I found it interesting, enlightening, instructive, and crucial to building stronger relationships and becoming more self-aware.

Excellent guide for assertive communication

Thorough and helpful guidance through attachment styles, communication styles and specific tools to help written for women by a woman.

Beneficial but not what I was expecting

I really enjoyed this book. However, I purchased it thinking it was a professional development book. It actually ended up being more of a self help book but also exactly what I needed. It was really insightful and encouraged self reflection in a way I’d never explored before. I’ll probably listen to this a few more times! I feel like there’s much to be learned!

Boundaries & love & relationships & fear

Thank you for writing this, helped me reflect & better aware of my own self such as my emotions, boundaries with relationships, & my attachment style. Loved the section about the importance of alone time, alone time does not mean depression there is healthy alone time.