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And Baby Makes Three  By  cover art

And Baby Makes Three

By: John M. Gottman PhD, Julie Schwartz Gottman PhD
Narrated by: Randye Kaye
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Publisher's summary

Having a baby is a joyous experience, but even the best relationships are strained during the transition from duo to trio. Lack of sleep, never-ending housework, and new fiscal concerns often lead to conflict, disappointment, and hurt feelings. In And Baby Makes Three, Love Lab™ experts John Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman teach couples the skills from their successful workshops, so partners can avoid the pitfalls of parenthood by:

  • Maintaining intimacy and romance
  • Replacing a culture of criticism and irritability with one of appreciation
  • Preventing postpartum depression
  • Creating a home environment that nurtures physical, emotional, and mental health as well as cognitive and behavioral development for your baby

Complete with exercises that separate the "master" from the "disaster" couples, And Baby Makes Three helps new parents positively manage the strain that comes along with their bundle of joy.

©2007 John M. Gottman, PhD, and Julie Schwartz Gottman, PhD (P)2017 Tantor

What listeners say about And Baby Makes Three

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Helps explain a lot of what has happened.

Explains a lot of whay has happened in my marriage. Particularly as being a father and the divide that grew between my wife and I. Also provide excellent exercises to build a stronger than before relationship.

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2 people found this helpful

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Informative and useful

Great book to help work through or think about issues between couples when they have a baby. Probably a good idea to read earlier on in pregnancy than just as you are bringing a new one home.

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    4 out of 5 stars

Good book for new couples & in fact for any couple

Lots of exercises to build a relationship between the partners. Explain lots of things which people take it as granted and explain how to avoid those pitfalls.

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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This book really needs an accompanying PDF!

Fantastic advice and very practical steps to go through but this being an audible version really makes it difficult to reference those lists and exercises present in the book. Please add a summary pdf to this book. I had to go online and buy a used copy of this book so I could use as reference/workbook

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2 people found this helpful

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Helpful and interesting

I love the Gottmans. I’m a therapist and also a new parent. This book was super helpful in so many ways. The only thing that I wish they included more of was data on queer couples. There was at least one shout out to lgbtq folks but what I really missed was more fine tuned examples that included couples who might be same sex or who don’t fit into heteronormative gender roles. Other than that, great info. Lots of great tips and tricks.

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  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
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Awful Narrator

I really want to like this book and I really want to like it, but I just can't. Not in audible form anyways. The narrator reads ridiculously fast and makes it difficult to be able to pay attention and follow along. I also don't think it was as well written as it could have been because the way it's going so far it's difficult to connect some of the stories with the lessons they're trying to implement.

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    3 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Expected more

If you’ve read any other Gottman stuff then this is nothing new. Don’t waste your money buying it.

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Excludes non-heterosexual relationships

Needs updating to include all types of families, partnerships, and upbringings. If updates were made it was at the beginning of the book and not throughout.

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3 people found this helpful

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    4 out of 5 stars
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More couple's therapy than adapting with new baby.

I expected this book to be about how to adjust to a new family member and the stresses that come with new babies. While the book did give insight as to a new mom's feelings of not being cared for and new dad's feelings of being left out, this book was mostly about how to fight better, listen and respond to your partners needs and concerns, and resolve conflict in a healthy way. Anyone could use these techniques. The book did discuss the impact healthy conflict resolution has on unborn babies and infants and how a couples relationship affects a babies understanding of his world. Very helpful and I look forward to listening with my partner and actually completing the questionnaires together to help us grow and become more unified.

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4 people found this helpful

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    3 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Dated and redundant information

I like the Gottman's work, overall, but found this book has quite a bit of similar information to some of their other works. Also, some of the gender discussions are dated and only applicable to heterosexuals.

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