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Barks Book Nonsense

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  • reviews
  • 24
  • helpful votes
  • 39
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  • Drawing Blood

  • A Novel
  • By: Poppy Z. Brite
  • Narrated by: Matt Godfrey
  • Length: 14 hrs and 3 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars 7
  • Performance
    4.5 out of 5 stars 7
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars 7

In the house on Violin Road he found the bodies of his brother, his mother, and the man who killed them both-his father. From the house on Violin Road, in Missing Mile, North Carolina, Trevor McGee ran for his sanity and his soul, after his famous cartoonist father had exploded inexplicably into murder and suicide. Now Trevor is back. In the company of a New Orleans computer hacker on the run from the law, Trevor has returned to face the ghosts that still live on Violin Road, to find the demons that drove his father to murder his family-and worse, to spare one of his sons. But as Trevor begins to draw his own cartoon strip, he loses himself in a haze of lines and art and thoughts of the past, the haunting begins. Trevor and his lover plunge into a cyber-maze of cartoons, ghosts, and terror that will lead either to understanding-true understanding-or to a blood-raining repetition of the past.

  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • I hope I never have to visit Birdland.

  • By MJ on 09-10-18

This is a most excellent horror/love story.

Overall
5 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
5 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 08-27-18

I always refer to this book as my second most favorite book in the world (Geek Love by Katherine Dunn will always be my #1) but I haven’t read it since it was first released back in 1993 so I approached this recent audio release with equal amounts of joy and dread. Would it still be my almost favorite? Would I find giant flaws and pick it all to hell? Would I tarnish all of those memories of book perfection by reading it now when I’m all jaded and crabby(er)?

Everything I remembered loving about Drawing Blood was still here. Granted those memories were a little fuzzy around the edges but the impressions and the emotions felt left a mark on me and once I started listening, I was immediately transfixed and reminded of all the reasons why I held this book so close to my heart. It’s full of tragedy, dark romance, and real life horrors as well as some out there, woo-woo ones. If you like those things along with a well-drawn sense of place, gorgeously lush writing, flawed characters and you don’t mind explicit sex between two men (and lots and lots of it) you should give this a listen. Or a read. Or maybe both.

This is one of Brite’s (now Billy Martin) earlier works and it has all of the gothic trappings of that era. The characters have sharp edges, are ethereally young and beautiful, the sex is explicit and often and it’s always earthy and descriptive, the characters that populate this world drink and drug copiously, fall in love quickly and deeply as young lovers tend to do and music always plays a huge part in their lives. I’d say this tale is about 50% haunted house/dealing with your past crap and 50% dark and dangerous love story and it’s all beautifully gory and messy.

Trevor is a young artist who returns to his hometown to face down the demons of his past and his demons are bad ones. Zach is a hacker on the run who lands in Missing Mile. Both have tormented pasts and when they meet everything clicks and feels right. Yes, folks, it is the dreaded insta-love in full bloom. And, yes, I am a big huge hypocrite because I typically knock off points for insta-love because it drives me crazy but in this case I JUST DIDN’T CARE. I loved them both too much to care. They don’t even meet until the book is at least a third of the way through (maybe more) but by then I knew them so well that when they finally meet it was a relief. They were both such broken souls when apart and together they just fit. They talked, they fought, they lived a lifetime of dysfunction in a few days and I will make no more excuses because, yeah, it’s insta-love and it was glorious and nothing anybody says will ever change my mind.

It’s such an intoxicating read. The love story, the setting, the darkness. All of it. Brite assaults the senses with her prose and everything comes alive right down to the scents and tastes - no matter how gross! This isn’t a book for everyone and I’m not here to pretend that it is but if any of this sounds appealing to you, grab a copy and read that sucker until your eyeballs dry up. I don’t think you’ll regret it.

If you’re an audio fan, I also highly recommend giving it a listen. Matt Godfrey’s narration is terrific. He creates distinctive voices for the characters. Zach’s voice is deeper and has just the slightest Cajun-esque accent to fit him and where he’s been, while Trevor comes off as more innocent/wide-eyed. How you express that with voice is way beyond me but Godfrey manages to do it. There are quite a few secondary characters that he voices very well too.

Now I'm off to listen all over again :)

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Cat Call

  • A Tale of Ghosts and Darker Things
  • By: Steve Vernon
  • Narrated by: Tom Zainea
  • Length: 28 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars 6
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars 6
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars 6

Nobody really knew how long the old Funnel mansion had stood empty, waiting up there high on Carpenter's Hill like a child's forgotten lunch box, any more than anybody knew just how long that old cat had squatted in behind the screen of the front porch window. Three young boys are about to find out just exactly what the dark and horrifying secret is behind that cat. Only two of them will survive.

  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • Stay there, kitty, kitty . . . stay there!

  • By Ray Johnson on 03-31-18

Creepy and haunting.

Overall
5 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
5 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 04-23-18

If you think your cat might really be a demon in disguise you need to read this.

This story had my name all over it. There’s a cat, a creepy house and the promise of a haunting good time and it delivered on all points plus a few more!

I seriously loved this little story and have no idea why I haven’t read this author before now but I’ll be changing that soon because I’ve just purchased two more.

A group of kids decide to investigate the local creepy mansion and dare each other to spit on the porch. Why do boys do such dumb things?! No need to answer that. Anyhow, they see an old gray cat behind the screen nibbling on what looks to them like a piece of raw meant. The dumbest bravest young man faces down the cat and it doesn’t end in a way any of them could ever have imagined!

This story is told from Jeremy’s POV and Jeremy knows true darkness having already experienced it twice in his young life. I am absolutely not going to tell you any more of what happened because you should all read this story for your own selves. Just know that it was heart-tugging and you will feel all kinds of emotions for this young boy within the first few minutes of the story that will continue until the end. Unless you’re totally dead inside, that is. If that’s the case, there’s no helping you. This is some fabulous characterization and I loved every moment of it. Very highly recommend!

If you pick this up on audio you won’t be disappointed by the narration. Tom Zainea has a down to earth voice that fits perfectly with this haunted little tale.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • A Monster Calls

  • Inspired by an Idea from Siobhan Dowd
  • By: Patrick Ness
  • Narrated by: Jason Isaacs
  • Length: 3 hrs and 59 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4.5 out of 5 stars 2,418
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars 2,262
  • Story
    4.5 out of 5 stars 2,260

As they do. But it isn’t the monster Conor’s been expecting. He’s been expecting the one from his nightmare, the nightmare he’s had nearly every night since his mother started her treatments, the one with the darkness and the wind and the screaming.... This monster, though, is something different. Something ancient, something wild. And it wants the most dangerous thing of all from Conor.

  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • A good "one-timer" for all ages

  • By TVNerd95 on 09-10-16

May devastate you.

Overall
5 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
5 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 04-11-18

A young boy dealing with a whole lot of awful, is visited by a monster who tells him stories and demands that after the third story is told the boy will have to share one of his own.

This one will punch you right in the heart and will probably make you cry. I don't think I will ever listen to it again because it is just too painful. The poor kids emotions are so raw and genuine and all over the place, the anger, the denial, the fear, all of it rang 100% true and that's all I'm saying because I don't want to spoil things for anyone who hasn't read it yet (though I may be the last!) and it's really to painful for me to revisit.

The narrator is most excellent too.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • The Late Breakfasters

  • By: Robert Aickman
  • Narrated by: Matt Godfrey
  • Length: 8 hrs and 53 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars 13
  • Performance
    4.5 out of 5 stars 13
  • Story
    3.5 out of 5 stars 12

One of the preeminent writers of weird fiction, Robert Aickman is celebrated for his unsettling and often ambiguous "strange stories", but he once wrote that "those, if any, who wish to know more about me, should plunge beneath the frivolous surface of The Late Breakfasters," his only novel, originally published in 1964.

  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • Matt Godfrey brings quirky Breakfasters to life!

  • By Ad n' Audie on 01-10-18

A quirky little tale.

Overall
3 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
2 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 03-27-18

I started and stopped this book several times this week. At one point, I had zoned out so much I think I might’ve lost two hours and just started the entire thing over from the beginning. It’s likely me and my lazy brain, which is still a little foggy from lingering back pain, but I’m not going to lie, this book isn’t what I thought it was going to be and it starts off terribly slow.

I don’t even know how to begin this review because the story doesn’t follow any of the rules and does its own thing. I’m still not sure what that thing was but it might’ve gone over my head. If you pick this story up thinking it’s going to be scary or a little creepy because of the cover art, you will be disappointed because it’s not either of those things. It starts out when a young lady named Griselda is invited to a house party by a family friend who enjoys having pretty eye candy around for the men. At least that was the way it came across to me. Also invited are a whole bunch of Very Important People and Political Big Wigs who debate about politics and other things that didn’t interest me in the faintest. There’s also a dull girl whose only interest in life appears to be mascara. They all eat breakfast and go on walks.

I kept waiting for something bizarre and eccentric to happen as the blurb promised me but it didn’t. There is a ghost that may be hanging about the house but nothing much was made of the fact and it certainly wasn’t a scary ghost. Griselda has a lightning fast love affair with a lovely lady named Louise which is likely scandalous at the time but it’s over nearly before it is started and before the two have been able to exchange contact information. Griselda longs for Louise but resigns herself to a life without her, taking on a job in a bookshop and meeting further quirky people who have some odd adventures and that’s really about it. As I said, it’s a strange little story with some fun moments but there weren’t enough to keep me from struggling to finish.

I’m sure someone is saying, “Why did this fool continue to read this story if all she does is whine and moan about it?” Well, here’s why:

• I am not only a fool but I am a stubborn fool. I’m also not really a quitter.

• The writing was beautiful and thoughtful and there’s quite a bit of social commentary thrown in, if that’s your thing.

• Several of the descriptions were oddly hilarious “He began to read the letter, looking, Griselda thought, like a monstrous sheep dyed green.” That just made me smile.

• The narration by Matt Godfrey was fantastic. He has a warm quality about his voice that lulls you in and makes you feel safe and comforted. If it weren’t for his narration, I seriously doubt I would’ve finished this book because this story isn’t the kind I typically seek out.

I’m giving the audio version a three because of the last three reasons. The story clearly wasn’t to my taste but you may read it and fall in love with the uniqueness of the tale. If it sounds interesting to you I’d recommend grabbing the audio and see where you land.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Smoke Gets in Your Eyes

  • And Other Lessons from the Crematory
  • By: Caitlin Doughty
  • Narrated by: Caitlin Doughty
  • Length: 7 hrs and 44 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4.5 out of 5 stars 3,242
  • Performance
    4.5 out of 5 stars 2,989
  • Story
    4.5 out of 5 stars 2,978

Most people want to avoid thinking about death, but Caitlin Doughty - a 20-something with a degree in medieval history and a flair for the macabre - took a job at a crematory, turning morbid curiosity into her life’s work. With an original voice that combines fearless curiosity and mordant wit, Caitlin tells an unusual coming-of-age story full of bizarre encounters, gallows humor, and vivid characters (both living and very dead).

  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • Ms. Frizzle Takes the School Bus to a Morgue

  • By Ren on 06-02-16

Riveting!

Overall
5 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
5 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 01-16-18

“A girl always remembers the first corpse she shaves.”

I sometimes think I’ve missed my life’s true calling. That of being a mortuary worker. But after reading this book I’m not so sure. I always thought the idea of working with people who didn’t talk back was a nice one, you know? No office politics, no grumpy personalities to tip-toe around, no one stealing your lunch and there’s never a lack of business. Sounds like bliss to me. Until I read this book which shattered those daydreams. There are some unsavory, heartbreaking and infuriating parts of the job that I never considered like . . .

Incinerating Babies
Gushing molten fat
Cheap ass relatives
Moving heavy bodies into the incinerator by yourself
Heads. Yep. Just the heads.

But then again, no job is perfect, right?

Caitlin Doughty captures her experiences while working at a mortuary and later going to school to make it official, with humor, insight and horror. I loved every captivating word. She has an extremely fanciful imagination and morbid wit that keeps you listening even when things get really dark or really disgusting and believe me they get disgusting!

She delves deep into the history of death rituals and how it all evolved into the system currently in place today. She doesn’t pull any punches and explains how embalming, though once a necessity on the battlefield, has morphed into nothing more than a money maker for the death industry. Fascinating! I always wondered why bodies weren’t buried naturally and given back to the earth and now I know the reason and it’s pretty damn depressing.

Doughty narrates this audiobook and she does a fantastic job. She knows her material best, after all, and her voice is clear and pleasant to listen to. She adds humor in all the right spots and it never feels forced. She has a strong grasp on the toll that being surrounded by death brings on those who deal with it day in and day out. She and her co-workers look at the world a little differently than most folks. I guess it’s hard not to when you face down death and deal with the aftermath every day. Death happens to everyone sooner or later and there’s no point living your life fearful of it coming for you. And it is coming for you!

“We are just future corpses.”

If you’re a morbid sort such as I, I highly recommend this book to you.

  • Burnt Offerings

  • Valancourt 20th Century Classics
  • By: Robert Marasco
  • Narrated by: R.C. Bray
  • Length: 7 hrs and 45 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars 1,694
  • Performance
    4.5 out of 5 stars 1,585
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars 1,583

Ben and Marian Rolfe are desperate to escape a stifling summer in their tiny Brooklyn apartment, so when they get the chance to rent a mansion in upstate New York for the entire summer for only $900, it's an offer that's too good to refuse. There's only one catch: behind a strange and intricately carved door in a distant wing of the house lives elderly Mrs. Allardyce, and the Rolfes will be responsible for preparing her meals. But Mrs. Allardyce never seems to emerge from her room, and it soon becomes clear that something weird and terrifying is happening in the house.

  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • Haunted house story more creepy than horrific

  • By Calliope on 05-03-17

A classic creep-fest

Overall
5 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
5 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 12-08-17

Marian is a 70’s housewife and she is tired of city life and coerces her husband, Ben, into checking out a summer rental with a beach that is far from the sweltering heat, stink and noise of the city. He says it sounds too good to be true and whines, “but honey, we can’t afford it”. But he caves. Should’ve stood your ground, man!

The rental turns out to be a giant estate on 200 acres. There are 30 rooms and all they have to do is pay $900 for the summer and leave “Mother” sustenance three times a day. Ummm, what? Yes, Mother is staying! Apparently, Mother doesn’t leave her room and will be no trouble at all as long as you keep to the feeding schedule or so say the weird brother and sister who are renting the place and who skedaddle out of town leaving no contact information as soon as the couple agrees to rent the place.

Marian immediately takes to the home as if it were her own, obsessively preparing meals for Mother and cleaning and fretting (which sounds like a vacation in Hell to me) while Ben, his aunt and their young son fritter away their days in the sun. But that doesn’t last long. Soon enough eerie events start to occur and Marian’s obsession with the house intensifies. They can try to escape but the house wants what it wants!

This was an unnerving listen that allows the dread to slowly build. It is read expertly by R.C. Bray who is perfect for this kind of old-timey story. His voice is so serious and wizened just enough to set the scene and make the words even creepier. But, folks, it was written in the early 70’s and its 70’s roots are definitely showing in some of the dialogue.

“I’ll do the talking. Just look pretty and keep your mouth shut.” Ben says this to Marian and she doesn’t punch him the face.

At another point Marian says (out loud, mind you) to Ben, “You know I’m the dumb one.” He accepts this as fact and again does not get punched in the face and they move along with their day.

Ahhh, the 70’s. I am so very glad I was too young to have to deal with this WTFery!

If you like haunted houses and haven’t listened to this story on audio, what the heck are you waiting for?

  • Dream Woods

  • By: Patrick Lacey
  • Narrated by: Joe Hempel
  • Length: 5 hrs and 47 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars 91
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars 83
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars 83

When Vince Carter takes a shortcut to work, he notices a billboard that nearly sends him into an oncoming van. The ad is for Dream Woods, New England's answer to Disney World. It closed decades ago, but now that it's back in business, Vince is eager to take his whole family, hoping the magic he remembers will save his failing marriage.

  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • Disney World for Horror Fans

  • By Spooky Mike on 09-08-17

A gory little novella that kept me hooked..

Overall
4 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
4 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 12-04-17

Vince remembers Dream Woods through a pleasant veil of childhood memory. Even though bad things (murder, murder and more murder!) were rumored to have happened there and it was shut down years ago, Vince learns that the bloods been cleaned up and it’s been re-opened. He decides that it will be a most excellent vacation destination even if his wife would much rather head to a resort and lounge around a beach all day (I’m with her). He feels it will help bring his family closer together.

He is quite mistaken.

Right away things seem a little off. The people staffing the place aren’t quite right. They don’t seem completely . . . human? But Vince, the eternal optimist, holds out hope that this magical place will make his wife love him again.

Awwww. You can’t but help but root for the sap, right? His wife, who has already left her family once, seems to resent her husband for abandoning his anarchist roots and settling down into a real job after she becomes pregnant with twins, one who has diabetes. She reminded me a bit of that teacher in the 90’s named Pam Smart who fell out of love with her husband when he cut his 80’s rocker locks to become an insurance salesman and I had zero sympathy for her. I kept reading on hoping she’d be the first victim of Dream Woods. So yay for keeping me interested during my reading slump ;)

This story was decent, not earth shattering but a solid little horror story that kept me hooked and that bloody bear mascot will haunt my dreams. Dream Woods has some gore and loads of decent characterization and narrator Joe Hempel does an excellent job with the voices.

*I received a copy of this audiobook via Audiobookboom. Thanks!

  • Funny Amazon Reviews

  • By: Jane Lynch
  • Narrated by: Jane Lynch
  • Length: 47 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    3.5 out of 5 stars 2,390
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars 1,965
  • Story
    3.5 out of 5 stars 1,957

Famous comedians reading real Amazon product reviews. Hosted by Jane Lynch and presented by Audible. Featuring Lewis Black, John O'Hurley, Joel McHale, Margaret Cho, Eugene Mirman, Kurt Braunohler, Lauren Cook, Jonathan Katz, Laura Silverman, Melissa Villasenor, Ron Funches, Gilbert Gottfried, Dan Savage, Vern Musical Improv.

  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • hilarious!!!

  • By EmilioDaVinci on 07-10-17

Not as funny without pictures of the items.

Overall
3 out of 5 stars
Performance
4 out of 5 stars
Story
2 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 11-22-17

I woke up this morning, let out the dog and stepped my bare foot into a steaming pile of cat vomit one of my furry demons so thoughtfully left for me on the mat nearest the door. Last week it was mouse innards (On My NAKED Foot!!) so I know from personal experience that it could always be worse. Much worse, actually. Still, after that stellar start to the morning I needed a little laugh on my commute to work before I started thinking bad thoughts and decided to give this one a listen.

Maybe it's my current sour mood or just the fact that I've already read 80% of these funny reviews on Amazon, but listening to them barely made me crack a smile. I think they work better on Amazon where you can actually see the product they're riffing on, especially the wolf shirt. You've got to see that wolf shirt if you haven't already. It's also a helluva lot more fun when you can read the accompanying funny reviews of the item because usually once someone starts it spirals into a page filled with wacky reviews.

I'll give this a three because I guess I liked it a little.

0 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Hell House

  • By: Richard Matheson
  • Narrated by: Ray Porter
  • Length: 9 hrs and 15 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars 3,450
  • Performance
    4.5 out of 5 stars 2,996
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars 2,996

For over 20 years, Belasco House has stood empty. Regarded as the Mt. Everest of haunted houses, its shadowed walls have witnessed scenes of unimaginable horror and depravity. All previous attempts to probe its mysteries have ended in murder, suicide, or insanity.

But now, a new investigation has been launched, bringing four strangers to Belasco House in search of the ultimate secrets of life and death. A wealthy publisher, brooding over his impending death, has paid a physicist and two mediums to establish the facts of life after death once and for all. For one night, they will investigate the Belasco House and learn exactly why the townsfolk refer to it as the Hell House.

  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • Got scary?

  • By Lesley on 06-17-08

Surprisingly sexually horrifying

Overall
3 out of 5 stars
Performance
4 out of 5 stars
Story
3 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 11-17-17

A rich guy offers to pay a group of people to stay a few nights in a haunted house to prove there is life after death. All previous attempts to do such a stupid thing at this particular house have ended very badly for the suckers brave or stupid or hard-up enough to have a sleep-over. It’s no different this time around.

I read this book closely on the heels of finishing up Shirley Jackson’s The Haunting of Hill House which was probably a big mistake on my part as the premise of these two books is nearly identical and Jackson’s story didn’t thrill me the way it did most people. Same goes for Hell House though I did like it a wee bit more than Jackson’s story but probably only because it was more lurid and crazy-pants and I like that kind of thing but it does suffer from the same over the top characterization.

This story is much more sexually horrifying. Some of the things that happen within these pages are upsetting. Trust me on this. The house was basically turned into a pit of debauchery and hellish events when its original owner cuts loose with a group of hangers-on who dip into orgies, drugs, murder, cannibalism (as you will, I guess) and every other nasty thing your brain can imagine! The house is tainted and incredibly haunted by a horny ghost who eventually infects the woman folk and does shocking pervy things.

I listened to this story on audio and the narrator, Ray Porter, does an excellent job. He is deadly serious which suits the story and he manages to deliver the lady voices in a way that doesn’t make them sound completely ridiculous even when they’re forced to behave in overly hysterical ways. He does a good job with the men and the evil inhabiting the house as well.

I’m going to give this the same rating as the Jackson book. 3 Stars.

  • Failure

  • By: John Everson
  • Narrated by: Joe Hempel
  • Length: 1 hr and 24 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    3.5 out of 5 stars 14
  • Performance
    4.5 out of 5 stars 14
  • Story
    3.5 out of 5 stars 14

When three desperate teens meet Aaron, a failed practitioner of the dark arts, who offers them the best high they've ever smoked in exchange for kinky sex play, things only go from bad to worse. Aaron hopes to ensnare and re-birth the spirit of a late witch to capture her power from beyond the grave for his own.

  • 3 out of 5 stars
  • Dark Short Story with Good Narration

  • By Cyndi on 09-21-15

A wee bit confusing at first

Overall
4 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
4 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 11-08-17


I received a copy of this audiobook from the publisher/author/narrator via Audio Book Blast in exchange for an honest review and that's what you're getting.

Failure follows three teens around as they momentously screw up their lives. It’s kind of fun to watch this disaster because, let’s be real, none of them are very nice people. The boys have no respect for girls and the girl has no respect for herself. But I’m not here to judge . . .

So, based on the promise of an epic high and some potentially epic sex, the three agree to meet and perform an occult sex ceremony for a kinky old guy who wants to watch (so he says). Even when he whips out the “pain chains” they don’t get suspicious. Nothing bad could possibly go wrong here, right?

The story is written in such a way that I thought it was a sequel. It’s told by various character points of view and it flips back between the days leading up to the ceremony to the present day situation and I was very confused in the beginning. Perhaps that’s due to my listening to the story on audio or perhaps it’s due to my limited brain power? I don’t really know, but it all began to make sense eventually. The narration is great. Joe Hempel sounds appropriately young for the characters, doesn’t give the females a creepy falsetto and he gives the old man the sinister vibe he deserved.

It was quick, brutal and gory but nothing new or groundbreaking. Just some ugly people doing ugly things and getting their comeuppance. It kind of felt like an 80’s throwback with sex crazed teens doing what they do and a plot that felt achingly familiar. Still, I kind of liked that about the book! 3 ½ stars