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ArcaneBard

  • 49
  • reviews
  • 45
  • helpful votes
  • 148
  • ratings
  • Desperate Housewives of Olympus

  • By: Saranna DeWylde
  • Narrated by: Hollie Jackson
  • Length: 9 hrs and 23 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4.5 out of 5 stars 20
  • Performance
    4.5 out of 5 stars 19
  • Story
    4.5 out of 5 stars 18

A riotous romp through Olympus with goddesses for the 21st century. When a new goddess moves to Ambrosia Lane, Hera decides she's finally had enough of her philandering husband. She offers herself and the crown of gods to Hades. Hades doesn't want the crown, but he'll take Hera. (Often and twice on Sunday.) He's a heartless bastard - having had Aphrodite rip it out so he'd stop loving Persephone after he set her free. Persephone is scheming to get back to Tartarus with the aid of Thanatos, who trips on his leather trench coat and falls in love with her.

  • 3 out of 5 stars
  • jumps around a bit

  • By KLM on 05-10-18

Deliciously Dramatic

Overall
5 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
5 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 03-14-19

This kind of book is not my usual cup of tea, but I was able to enjoy it for the farcical romp it is.

  • Shards of Shattered Sentiments: An Exploration of Poetic Form Through the Lens of Horror

  • Shards Chapbooks, Book 1
  • By: John Baltisberger
  • Narrated by: John Baltisberger
  • Length: 16 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars 1
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars 1
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars 1

Poetry in one form or another has been around almost as long as language. We have used it to communicate our joys and heartbreaks, our victories and our losses. But fear has also been a constant companion, and our ghost stories and monsters stretch their claws back into history as far as the eyes can see. It's with this in mind that we begin our journey through various poetic forms, from traditional Japanese Haiku to more modernist takes such as The Bop. Exploring the rules that create these literary creations all while bending their use to telling scary stories.  

  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • A Fine Collection of Poems

  • By ArcaneBard on 03-06-19

A Fine Collection of Poems

Overall
5 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
5 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 03-06-19

Rich in vocabulary, energetic in rhythm, these poems employ rhyme and metre with deliberate purpose, never meandering far from the subject. Enjoyable cosmic horror.

  • Eastern Asian Classics

  • The Art of War, Tao Te Ching, and The Book of Five Rings
  • By: Sun Tzu, Lao Tzu, Miyamoto Musashi
  • Narrated by: Gregg Rizzo
  • Length: 3 hrs and 49 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars 2
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars 1
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars 1

These three classic Eastern Asian works have stood the test of time, having been listen all across the world to this day. The Art of War is an ancient Chinese military treatise authored by military strategist Sun Tzu. The work is comprised of 13 chapters, each chapter is devoted to a distinct aspect of warfare relating to military strategy. The Art of War has had a profound influence on both Eastern and Western military thinking, business tactics, and strategy. The Tao Te Ching is a fundamental text for both philosophical and religious Taoism.

  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • A Perfectly Adequate Collection

  • By ArcaneBard on 02-14-19

A Perfectly Adequate Collection

Overall
5 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
5 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 02-14-19

I have read all these books before in other translations and interpretations This collection is a sufficient presentation of these classic works, although I recommend reading other renditions in order to gain diverse understanding. The narrator was competent.

I received this audiobook in exchange for an honest review.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Storm Glass

  • (Harbinger, Book 1)
  • By: Jeff Wheeler
  • Narrated by: Kate Rudd
  • Length: 11 hrs and 43 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4.5 out of 5 stars 2,896
  • Performance
    4.5 out of 5 stars 2,579
  • Story
    4.5 out of 5 stars 2,562

Theirs is a world of opposites. The privileged live in sky manors held aloft by a secretive magic known only as the Mysteries. Below, the earthbound poor are forced into factory work to maintain the engine of commerce. Only the wealthy can afford to learn the Mysteries, and they use their knowledge to further lock their hold on society. Cettie Pratt is a waif doomed to the world below, until an admiral attempts to adopt her. But in her new home in the clouds, not everyone treats her as one of the family.

  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • Immersive, Wonderful, Magical!

  • By Huntress on 07-05-18

Boring

Overall
3 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
2 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 01-07-19

I just couldn't finish this one. After listening halfway through, nothing interesting happened. The good guys seem to all be pillers of virtue. The villains are all snobbish, vain, and stupidly evil. This is just more dystopian tripe, the haves versus the have-nots. The author seems to care more about preaching their own morality than crafting and telling an engaging story.
l received this audiobook as a free promotion and left this review voluntarily.

  • Angst

  • By: David J Pedersen
  • Narrated by: Michael Troughton
  • Length: 12 hrs and 8 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4.5 out of 5 stars 19
  • Performance
    4.5 out of 5 stars 18
  • Story
    4.5 out of 5 stars 18

For 2,000 years, magic has been outlawed, repressed, even outright destroyed throughout the world of Ehrde. By law, Angst is reduced to using his great power only to file papers. But without warning, Unsel is besieged with dangerous monsters - birds with metallic beaks, monkey creatures that can dive through solid ground, mindless horse-eating giants. The world that shunned magic now turns to Angst for help, and he is happy to listen once his back stops hurting. On the edge of a midlife crisis, Angst drags his reluctant friends along with him on an adventure into the heart of magic.

  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • Surprisingly good

  • By TU on 02-08-19

An Excellent Tale of Magic and Heroism

Overall
5 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
5 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 01-04-19

While many fantasy novels feature youthful protagonists, Angst receives the hero's call in his middle years. And he's not a reluctant hero either, which is refreshing; he is all about fighting the good fight.
This is a bright and colorful story, filled with magic and droll characters. There is a bit of set up in the beginning, but that all changes when the adventures kick in. The prose is clean and clear, and the dialogue/banter will bring many a chuckle.
Michael Troughton is a superb narrator. He did a fine job bringing the characters to life.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • The Misadventures of Ka-Ron the Knight

  • The "Nown" World Chronicles, Book One
  • By: Donald Allen Kirch
  • Narrated by: Veronica Stewart
  • Length: 14 hrs and 39 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars 8
  • Performance
    3.5 out of 5 stars 8
  • Story
    3.5 out of 5 stars 8

A brave knight is wrongfully cursed, turning him into the most beautiful woman on the planet. To reverse this spell, "she" must form a quest to seek out the Wicca master who cast the spell, hopefully changing her mind. Along the way, the knight falls in love with her squire, battles vampires, helps aid an elf revolution, and even becomes pregnant. Ultimately, her squire must make the hard choice: Does he help his master complete "her" quest, or does he try to keep his one true love?

  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • Much more to it than a sex change story.

  • By Harry on 01-10-19

Whimsical and Eventful

Overall
3 out of 5 stars
Performance
3 out of 5 stars
Story
3 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 12-29-18

This audiobook is odd. It is full of odd occurrences, so "Misadventures" is the right word for it. I had a hard time understanding character movitations. Problems and solutions seemed to come easy. There was much absurdity, but also lots of drama. The narrator seriously needs to stop using squeaky, goofy, childish voices for the side characters. Her normal narrator voice was fine, but the wizard and dragon voices were annoying. Overall, this book is a head-scratcher.

I was given a free copy of this audiobook in exchange for an honest review.

  • Tales of the Weird 3

  • By: Tom Slemen
  • Narrated by: Nigel Peever
  • Length: 12 hrs and 16 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars 8
  • Performance
    4.5 out of 5 stars 6
  • Story
    4.5 out of 5 stars 6

Welcome to the third volume of Tales from the Weird by one of England's top cult writers on the supernatural - Tom Slemen. In this disturbing but thought-provoking book, you will hear about real-life paranormal nightmares set in places ranging from Liverpool to Los Angeles, Alaska to Australia, and New York to New Brighton.

  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • loved it

  • By Wendy Hay on 03-23-17

Tales of the Unexplained

Overall
3 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
3 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 12-17-18

The stories in this book remind me of Unsolved Mysteries, X-Files, or other programs that feature mysteries case files. The narrator was absolutely brilliant. I found the stories to be only so-so, mainly because weird occurrences keep happening again and again, but nothing is ever really resolved or explained. The writer's intention may be to let the reader/listener fill in the blanks. If so, then this may just not be my cup of tea.

I was given a free copy of this audiobook in exchange for a fair review.

  • Zombie Park

  • By: Kent Hill
  • Narrated by: J. Scott Bennett
  • Length: 1 hr and 55 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4.5 out of 5 stars 10
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars 10
  • Story
    4.5 out of 5 stars 10

Imagine being liquid enough to fool around with the building blocks of life just to create a park full of zombies to cash in on the general public's infatuation with the undead. Now imagine, as it often does, something going wrong with that concept and zombies ruining the world for everybody. Next, imagine dinosaurs returning to prominence in a Planet of the Apes-type scenario and evolving so they fill all the roles we humans did before the fall of the species. So our story begins. A group of dino-commandos are sent in to uncover the fate of their missing colleagues....

  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • Zombies vs Dinos after humans go extinct

  • By Ray Johnson on 11-29-18

Absurd, Crude, and Just Plain Silly!

Overall
4 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
3 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 11-28-18

I received this audiobook in exchange for an honest review.

I recommend this book for anyone who appreciates gross-out, lowbrow humor. This is the audiobook equivalent to a Troma film, ultra violent/gross/raunchy. While the plot makes little sense, it was fast paced enough to keep my interest. Not for the easily offended and certainly not for children. It is possible to enjoy, but is best enjoyed with the brain turned off.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Blackwater: The Complete Saga

  • By: Michael McDowell
  • Narrated by: Matt Godfrey
  • Length: 30 hrs and 9 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4.5 out of 5 stars 3,379
  • Performance
    4.5 out of 5 stars 3,155
  • Story
    4.5 out of 5 stars 3,152

Blackwater is the saga of a small town, Perdido, Alabama, and Elinor Dammert, the stranger who arrives there under mysterious circumstances on Easter Sunday, 1919. On the surface, Elinor is gracious, charming, anxious to belong in Perdido, and eager to marry Oscar Caskey, the eldest son of Perdido's first family. But her beautiful exterior hides a shocking secret. Beneath the waters of the Perdido River, she turns into something terrifying, a creature whispered about in stories that have chilled the residents of Perdido for generations.

  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • A 6 Star Worthy Epic!

  • By jksullycats on 10-29-17

Masterful, but Unsatisfying

Overall
5 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
5 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 11-14-18

I will start off by saying that this book is masterfully written. The characters, imagery, and prose are incredibly vivid. For these things alone I give it 5 stars. However, I found the overall story itself disappointing and unsatisfying. There was not enough payoff, not enough answers given. It may be that this was simply not to my taste. I will not be reading anything by this author again, as skilled as they are.

  • The Throne of Bones

  • By: Brian McNaughton
  • Narrated by: Wayne June
  • Length: 13 hrs and 59 mins
  • Unabridged
  • Overall
    4.5 out of 5 stars 59
  • Performance
    4.5 out of 5 stars 54
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars 54

This book won a World Fantasy Award. It's remarkable: The stories are rich, fascinating stuff - creepy and unsettling and phantasmic. Imagine what Tolkien's Lord of the Rings would have been like if Tolkien had tried to tell that story sympathetically from the point of view of the human denizens of Mordor and you'll have the slightest sense of what you're about to wade into... but only just a sense.

  • 5 out of 5 stars
  • I had a visceral reaction to this book!

  • By Joseph on 06-05-15

A Masterpiece on the Subject of Ghouls

Overall
5 out of 5 stars
Performance
5 out of 5 stars
Story
5 out of 5 stars

Reviewed: 10-29-18

I enjoyed this book so much. As a fan of Lovecraft, Howard, and Clark Ashton Smith, I feel that The Throne of Bones is a most worthy addition to weird fiction and literary horror. Marvelous.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful