I heard this book was really good and based on the reviews I fully expected it to be fantastic. It was definitely not. It was very slow. The stories seemed very remedial, like something I would have heard in grade school. It wasn't bad information, it just wasn't the ground breaking book I thought it would be. You could probably listen to a lecture from a sixth grade school teacher and get the same depth of topic.
The most theatrical reading of any audiobook I've listened to. Very engaging.
The message of boundaries is thoroughly communicated and so life giving that I began to feel more and more peace the further into the book I got. The world doesn't seem like such a dangerous and damaging place now. I don't have to protect myself with aggression. I have loving, empathetic boundary-setting conversations and consequences to protect me. And I deserve to be protected so that I can love what God loves. Me!
It the book actually were driven by psychology and Biblical teachings, rather then just grabbing snippets from both, doing justice to neither.
This author has his own theory, and grabs really odd snippets from scripture to supposedly "support" that the book is a spiritually-driven book. It's just a guy's theory -- and I've just completed coursework in developmental psych and personality psych and he doesn't even apply those priniciples right. I think this book has brought anger to some I know who have read it, without giving them a sound psychological or scriptural way to deal with it.
I am one of those doormats that really needed to learn about boundaries. I haven't fixed everything yet but I'm getting there. I have listened to this book twice and I plan to listen to it again!
Mat not agree with some scriptural applications, but the points, Messages, reasoning and practical applications are spot on. So very glad I listened.
Personally and professionally life changing. I've been doing a lot of self- work and this was recommended to me. I just finished it and am about to start again. Major breakthroughs! A few highlights I wrote down:
"Telling someone something they need to hear is not wrong. Not considering their feelings is wrong.
Boundaries are a litmus of our relationships.
If someone does something for you, see it as a gift. Someyhing someone does for us because they love us. The appropriate response to a gift is gratitude. Distinguish between those who give to get.
Refusing to forgive someone means that you still want something from them.
Respond versus react: You are in control when you respond. They are in control when you react.
Good things stay good when you limit them."