Funny Urban

By now, Dr. Robert Urban should probably know better. After all, this is his tenth book—and six of them have been national bestsellers. (The other four? Let’s just say they are… “still top notch doorstops”) But in Lick the Spoon, Urban proves once again that nobody else can make you laugh, cringe, and nod in painful recognition quite like he can. His collection of stories and observations from his life aren’t just funny—they’re the kind of funny where you feel like you’re right there with him, muttering, “Oh no, Rob… you didn’t.” Except you’re secretly glad he ...

Isabella Proctor has a new super power... ...finding dead bodies. What did she ever do to deserve this? She’d like to trade this power in for something, anything else – talk to ants, mix the perfect mojito, anything other than finding her friends dead. After her neighbor is murdered, her not-so-ordinary life takes a sharp turn into the weird – magic amulets, secret societies, deadly feuds, and talking cats. Things go from bad to worse when another friend is murdered and she can’t go to Detective Palmer for help. Can she capture a witch so much older and stronger than she is or will ...

Dr. June Miller is a genius chemist, not a wolf-tamer. But when a lab accident drenches her in "Compound X"—a synthetic pheromone mimicking a female wolf in peak heat—she becomes the most wanted snack in Chicago. She flees into the nearest bar, which happens to be The Den. Enter Colton. He owns the bar, runs the city, and has been celibate for a decade. One whiff of June, and his control snaps. He saves her from a bar brawl of drooling wolves, scoops her up, and locks her in his high-security penthouse for "protection." Trapped together while the chemical wears off, the line between ...

The school secretary has a sharp tongue but is she a killer? Can Marty do the math or will he get schooled by a criminal mastermind? Marty Golden is frazzled. Struggling to juggle nieces, a rambunctious dog, a demanding job, and a serious relationship, the software engineer is never quite sure whether he’s coming or going. But when his nemesis begs for help after she’s accused of offing the school principal, the amateur sleuth agrees to hunt down the real culprit. Confounded to discover the cantankerous woman stood to take the dead man’s position, he strives to find anyone who could ...

Jerry and Monique are your average working couple from the hood just trying to make a living. What happens when they wake up one morning to a shocking news flashed that sets off complete pandemonium that will not be forgotten for decades to come. The city infrastructure has collapsed leaving citizens with no law enforcement, fire fighters, or electric power for at least 24 hours. To make matter worse, it's devils night!

When two chefs wind up dead at a quaint bed-and-breakfast, it’s up to sleuthing witch Kyla to crack the case. But with trouble brewing in the kitchen and no shortage of suspects, will Kyla’s magical abilities be enough to outsmart a devious killer? This spellbinding paranormal cozy mystery series is one you won’t want to miss! Description from Book 1 (Magically Murdered) Kyla knows a lot about magic but nothing about working kitchen magic. When the police hire her to go undercover as Moonstruck Manor’s newest culinary mastermind and investigate the mysterious deaths of the manor’s...

A pet dragon, dangerous magic, and two hot guys...and that's just book 1! This boxed set contains all three novels in the Quarter Witch Chronicles series, including Dragons are a Girl's Best Friend, While the Dragon's Away, and A Good Dragon is Hard to Find. Description from Book 1: On the outside, Ruby’s a normal college student. On the inside? She’s something else completely. Magic runs through her veins, tempting her to use it, but Ruby isn’t sure how to control her new powers…until Ty, a dangerously handsome man from another world, spots her and identifies her as a witch. He ...

Her fantasy is coming true – but can she trust it? Ever since Barb’s friend Vanessa got into a committed relationship with two men, she’s been fantasizing about what it would be like to have two people focused on her and giving her pleasure. But when she meets best friends Aaron and Carter at a nightclub, it seems too good to be true. These hot younger guys can’t possibly be interested in her, right? But they keep coming around, chipping away at her resistance until she starts to believe that maybe she’s finally found the two guys who can give her the happily ever after she’s ...

Pandemonium: a twilight dimension of nightmare creatures, mythical beings, the undead, and everything in between. To Dead Jack, it’s hell sweet hell. In the first book of the series, the tortured, drug-addicted detective and his associate, the homunculus Oswald, face rogue leprechauns, ghost pirates, a sex-obsessed shark woman, sycophantic ghouls, an insecure fire demon, and a goateed maniac who calls himself the Duke of Pandemonium.

One night with a superpowered babe. Alan Star thinks he's the luckiest guy in the world, but fantasy turns into nightmare when a late-night meetup with a heroine turns deadly. To the dismay of the powers-in-charge, Alan has stumbled upon the dirty truth behind the squeaky-clean image of the hero business. Soon, everyone from government black ops to angry superpowered flames want to shut him up. Permanently. With nowhere else to run, Alan escapes to the one place that the heroes won't go: the underground world of a fabled hero-killer. There, he discovers the key to becoming the greatest hero...

Satire master Robert Urban ups the ante in his most recent book sharing his unique perspective about life, love and of course a little cheddar biscuit we all love. Filled with deep thoughts juxtaposed by one-liners, hysterical anecdotes, tangential thoughts and edgy, absurd humor this book is meant to give people who don't take themselves too seriously a rapid fire delivery of humor in only the way Robert can.

Midlife reinvention was the plan. What she got was a magical shop with attitude. Ginny Smyth needs peace to recover from divorce anguish. Instead, the forty-something is blindsided when she's bound to an enchanted establishment, which just happens to deliver perilous judgments on other people's fates. Her horror intensifies when she discovers looming supernatural threats primed to destroy her newfound sanctuary. With rules piling up and chaos spiraling, Ginny's frustration builds as survival means accepting help from a maddening but hot dragon shifter and an oddly familiar seamstress witch ...

Saving the world is easy. Saving their reputation? That requires a degree in Public Relations. My name is Peter Vance, and I don’t have super strength, laser vision, or a tragic origin story. I have a PR degree, a tailored suit, and a massive caffeine addiction. In a city full of capes, I’m the guy they call when a hero accidentally throws a city bus through a hospital window. I’m the best crisis manager in the business. But my newest assignment might actually kill me. I’ve been hired to manage the Vanguard, the city’s most powerful, all-female superhero team. The media calls them...

Midlife crisis or magical apocalypse? Can't it be both? Angie Daly thought her biggest problems were keeping her struggling bookstore afloat and surviving her eccentric family. At forty-something, that means supporting her twenty-something twins, ignoring her divorced parents hooking up above her garage, tolerating her husband’s sea-shanty band phase, and propping up her best friend through a bitter divorce. That all feels manageable until Angie wakes in the middle of the night to find two elves, an aggravated fairy, and a gluttonous miniature giant tearing through her refrigerator. The ...

She needed Jesus, therapy, and a man with some sense. Linette Jenkins is forty-six, fine, successful, divorced, and absolutely too grown to be this irritated. After her ex-husband Gerald runs off and marries a younger blonde fantasy with Daisy Duke energy and no visible depth, Linette decides she still has plenty of life, body, and options left. Unfortunately, the dating pool after forty comes with surprises nobody warned her about: personal trainers with stamina but no sense, polished men with secret fiancés, ex-husbands still bitter from a distance, teenagers with opinions, and best ...

How do you take on the most powerful organization of the supernatural world? One death at a time. A thousand years in the making, the Council finally has created their strongest weapon. What they didn’t expect was for her to target them. Forged by the pits of the underworld, Brooklyn plays her part all too well until the assassination of her friend. It was meant to send Brooklyn a message. What it did instead was unleash an uncontrolled rage that threatens the Council’s very existence. Each target tips the moral compass and realigns who is friend and who is foe. Unified by necessity, ...

What happens when a friendly bet leads to modeling nude for a college art class? When a hot female student loses a rock climbing bet with her roommates, she's forced to pose nude for a university art class. What starts as a mortifying punishment quickly transforms into an exhilarating journey of self-discovery as she catches the appreciative eye of the Silver Fox Professor. Under his artistic gaze, her embarrassment melts away, replaced by a burning desire that can't be contained within the borders of any canvas. Their forbidden attraction ignites into a forbidden encounter that breaks all ...

Can her magic save the world—before his curse destroys it?Shy, awkward Dru never believed she had what it takes to be a true sorceress. That's why she’s been running a little crystal shop on the rough side of Denver, selling potions and charms to the larger-than-life spellcasters who defend the world against the forces of darkness. But when she accidentally touches hands with a dangerously handsome stranger, sparks fly — literally — and he supercharges her crystal magic powers. Ironically, Greyson doesn’t know a thing about magic. But his screaming-fast muscle car is possessed by ...

An alien cat turned me into a superweapon. I was homeless on the streets of Third York when it happened. Then the military arrived and gave me a choice. Enlist or die. The next thing I knew, I was fighting giant robots at the Xenoforce Academy's boot camp. Figuring out superpowers and energy levels was hard enough, but I had to deal with a mind-reading alien princess, a team of gorgeous women, and a femme fatale in charge of the whole operation. Oh, and a galactic conspiracy is threatening all of humanity. It's up to me and my new feline friend to set things right. A civil war's brewing on ...

Three possessive mates. One magic-eating Dean. And a glitter bomb with his name on it. Northcrest University was supposed to be my sanctuary. A place where I could master my chaotic magic and enjoy the company of my Triad—the three powerful, dangerous men fate bound to my soul. Rhett, the stormy Alpha Wolf who looks at me like I’m his next meal. Kai, the Earth Elemental who grounds me when the world spins out of control. Lucien, the Vampire whose shadows promise a darkness I’m dying to taste. But the honeymoon phase is over. A new Dean has taken over Northcrest, and he isn’t just a ...