just Being still can be hard

This week I talk about how hard taking the time to relax has been for me these first few weeks home. I find that I have implicitly lived with the value that leisure time is unproductive, and even when I am "being still", "taking time for myself", etc. -- it has been wrapped up in something more calculated than it really should be. It has been to achieve this version of myself I picture to be "fulfilled"-- opposed to following my own intuition and taking care of myself and being still because I want to take care of who I am. Something as simple as being still can be hard!

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