Why We Argue Instead of Resolving Conflicts

You make a point. They make a counterpoint. You counter their counterpoint with your original point. They recycle their counterpoint. You both think the other person isn't listening because if the other truly understood you, they would agree with you because you're obviously right.

Many of our conflicts turn circular because we get confused about whether we misunderstand one another or whether we understand each other perfectly and just disagree. Sometimes leadership means being the one to slow down and figure out what's happening, real time, so you can figure out the best thing to do next.

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