When ADHD is Messing With Your Relationship

When you hear the term “ADHD,” what do you think about? Someone with a short attention span, who is forgetful, who can’t settle down? This neurological condition is difficult to live with—whether you’re the one experiencing it, or are in a relationship with someone who is.

ADHD is like other disorders in that the resulting behavior, while frustrating, is never intentional, so both partners need to educate themselves about it and learn to manage the disorder together. Because it can result in some level of chaos in the household, as deadlines are missed, bills are unpaid, social obligations are ignored, it’s important to approach it in collaboration and devise a plan that will place guardrails around its worst consequences.

Oh, and how ADHD manifests will be different for men and for women, so watch that; it’s easy to make assumptions about your partner based on how you perceive the problem.

There are medications and cognitive-behavioral strategies that can help, and your therapist—you are seeing a therapist, right?—can help determine what treatment modalities arebest for you.