What Actually Strengthens a Marriage? A Therapist Responds

What actually strengthens a marriage and what damages it?

In previous episodes, I shared five things women do that strengthen their marriages, five things that weaken them, and the same for men. In this episode, I invited marriage and family therapist Emil Harker to respond.

Emil has over two decades of experience helping couples navigate conflict and build stronger relationships. I wanted to see how a professional therapist would react to my perspective: where he agreed, where he added nuance, and what insights he brought from years of working with couples.

This turned into a thoughtful and surprisingly fun conversation about the habits that help marriages thrive, the behaviors that slowly undermine them, and the small changes that can make a huge difference.

If you're married—or hope to be someday—this conversation will give you practical insights into how relationships actually work.

If you're new to this show, I focus on how belief and mindset shape our actions, which ultimately lead to success in every area of life—including marriage.

About Emil:

With a rich background of psychotherapy theory, and human development from his graduate studies at AAMFT (American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists) accredited Utah State University, Emil Harker has been involved in helping people overcome obstacles and get the most out of life for almost 20 years.

Emil has worked in a variety of settings from the poverty stricken to the very wealthy and from addictions to life coaching. Emil understands the dynamics of change. A gifted therapist, dynamic presenter and clinical innovator, Emil is passionate about what he does.

Before graduating in 2000, Emil worked at McKay Dee Hospital in Ogden Utah in the adult behavioral unit. Since graduating he has become a certified trainer in the “Boys Town” parenting model, a certified trainer from the Arbinger Institute. Emil is in private practice online and in Farmington, Utah. A talented presenter, Emil’s material is as entertaining as it is informative.

He is the author of the book “You Can Turn Conflict Into Closeness.” The principles and techniques in managing conflict productively are the same skills and techniques to deal with conflict in the workplace. He is frequent presenter and trainer, and a regular expert on KUTV Channel 2 Fresh Living Program, and life coach for NBA, NFL, and UFC professional athletes. Emil is passionate about what he does and you can't help but feel it!

Check out his website here: https://www.emilharker.com/

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