A LONG TIME AGO, IN THE 2005 MOVIE ADAPTATION OF PRIDE AND PREJUDICE:

• You’ve got no sons to inherit your estate, only five daughters, so what the hell are you going to do to ensure your family’s housing and security?
• Why, you send Jane, the oldest and prettiest to catch a cold in the rain so rich Mr Bingley will fall in love with her!
• You let your boring cousin take his pick of the flock, Lizzy; but when she’s not into it, he goes off and marries her best friend so your plan is again RUINED!
• You don’t take any of the rest of your daughters seriously, till the youngest one SCANDALOUSLY runs off with Mr Wickham.
• Luckily there’s a Mr Darcy around to fix the situation with money and marriage, because is there a problem that money and marriage can’t fix?
• In the end, neither pride nor prejudice can get in the way of Bennet sisters marrying for love plus, conveniently, carriage-loads of money.

Join Jenny Owen Youngs, Helen Zaltzman and Vanessa Zoltan to investigate the 2005 movie adaptation of Pride and Prejudice, and investigate such mysteries as whether this could be recut as a horror film, why is everyone so mean to Mary, whether rainstorms are sexy or just soggy, and why the hell are these wigs allowed.

This episode is a joyous union between VMI and Vanessa's podcast Hot and Bothered, which is all about romance novels. Hear the current season Live from Pemberley, about Pride and Prejudice, in the pod places and at hotandbotheredrompod.com.

A long time ago (well, a couple of years ago) we recapped the 1995 BBC miniseries adaptation of P&P, which you can hear downfeed and at vmipod.com/prideandprejudice.

Follow @VMIpod on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook to keep up with any new VMI developments, we do miss you, and talking about tiny jackets.

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A LONG TIME AGO IN THE 1954 MGM MUSICAL BRIGADOON:

• New York City gents Gene Kelly and Van Johnson are lost in the Scottish Highlands! They want to shoot some birds, but instead stumble upon a village that’s not on the map… Brigadoon!
• Everyone’s dancing around the town and preparing for a wedding that evening; meanwhile, sister of the bride Cyd Charisse gets to fall in love with Gene Kelly on the heathery hillsides.
• But something’s weird, and it’s not just the fake Scottish accents, the very tight tartan trousers, the two-dimensional mountains and all the day-drinking: it’s that the village is under an enchantment whereby it only appears on one day every hundred years, and it will disappear forever if anyone tries to leave.
• Then someone tries to leave!
• Then Gene Kelly and Van Johnson have to leave before the village goes sleepy-byes for another hundred years. But Gene left his heart behind...
• Lucky for him, there’s a special wake-up-Brigadoon-early clause buried deep in the small print of the enchantment, because of course there is.

Join Jenny Owen Youngs and Helen Zaltzman to investigate the 1954 MGM musical Brigadoon and its many, many mysteries, such as why choose an enchantment with SO many downsides, how Logan Echolls might have seen this, seriously why such a self-owning enchantment, whether the village's crops and foods stay fresh during the 100-year sleeps, and COME ON THINK THIS ENCHANTMENT THROUGH BEFORE CONDEMNING YOUR WHOLE VILLAGE TO IT.

For more about this episode, and to read the transcript, visit the podcast’s official site VMIpod.com/brigadoon. VMI will now take a pause; to keep posted about what's coming up on the show, follow @VMIpod on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook and sign up for our mailing list at vmipod.com/vmimail.

This episode was edited and mixed by Helen Zaltzman; the music is by Martin Austwick and Jenny Owen Youngs.

We have MERCH but only till the end of 2021! And it's currently on deep discount. So you have a very short time to get your beautiful Not Milk T-shirts and pins, and your long lens pins and Gay For Weevil mementoes, at hellomerch.com/collections/veronica-mars-investigations.

Our ad partner is Multitude. To sponsor episodes of the show, contact them at multitude.productions/ads. This episode is sponsored by Dipsea, the app full of sexy stories and somnolent soundscapes. Get an extended 30 day free trial at DipseaStories.com/veronica.

Support the show: https://www.paypal.com/cgi-bin/webscr?cmd=_s-xclick&hosted_button_id=TWQYZDRGZUGH8&source=url

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A LONG TIME AGO IN HOME ALONE:

• In an enormous house in Chicago, the enormous McAllister family is preparing to leave for a Christmas trip to Paris.
• But, when designated naughty child Kevin causes a ruckus at dinner, he is sent to sleep in the attic as punishment.
• Then in the chaos of being such an enormous family with shitloads of kids, the McAllisters accidentally fly off to Paris without Kevin, leaving him Home Alone.
• Thus, an 8-year-old who has never even packed a suitcase before has to fend for himself in a hostile adult world.
• AND fend off two serial burglars who are determined to break into the enormous McAllister house! Even after Kevin subjects them to multiple kinds of potentially fatal harm.
• A grim cavalcade of child neglect and violence: ho ho ho Merrrry Christmas!

Join Jenny Owen Youngs, Helen Zaltzman and resident legal expert Lo Dodds to investigate the crimes that take place in the harrowing cavalcade of ultraviolence that is Home Alone, and learn what the penalties would be for such misdeeds as hanging a child on a hook, stealing a toothbrush, leaving your 8-year-old unattended while you jet off to Paris, and shooting a burglar in the dick.

Content note: Home Alone contains storylines concerning child neglect and violence.

For more about this episode, and to read the transcript, visit the podcast’s official site VMIpod.com/home-alone. And to keep posted about what's coming up on the show, follow @VMIpod on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook and sign up for our mailing list at vmipod.com/vmimail.

Next episode, we will be recapping Logan Echolls's favourite film: BRIGADOON! A once-in-a-hundred-years occasion, so join us mid-December for that.

This episode was edited and mixed by Helen Zaltzman; the music is by Martin Austwick and Jenny Owen Youngs.

We also have MERCH - get your pins to show your love for Weevil or non-love for milk at hellomerch.com/collections/veronica-mars-investigations.

Support the show: https://www.paypal.com/cgi-bin/webscr?cmd=_s-xclick&hosted_button_id=TWQYZDRGZUGH8&source=url

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.