Unlocking Motivation: How to Help Your Son Find His Spark

Is your son pulling away, shutting down, or showing little interest in school or chores?

You’re not alone — and there is a way forward.

In this third episode of our special 3-part ON BOYS series, we focus on how to foster intrinsic (inner) motivation in boys. Because yes, it’s in there — even when it feels completely buried.

We’ll help you understand the difference between intrinsic and extrinsic motivation, and why both matter. You’ll hear real-world examples from our own lives and families, plus honest talk about what doesn’t work. (Spoiler: there’s no magic phrase that makes a boy suddenly say, “Sure, I’d love to do my homework!”).

Photo By: Kaboompics.com via Pexels

Takeaways:

• Inner motivation is the key to lasting engagement.
• External rewards (ice cream, screen time, earrings!) can work in the short term — even for adults.
• Understanding your son’s developmental stage helps you support him more effectively.
• Motivation-building strategies will look different for each child — even within the same family.
• Parents can boost motivation by aligning with boys’ goals and interests.

his episode is part of our lead-up to the Boost Boys’ Motivation interactive class:

3 live sessions in May 2025 with real-time Q&A, strategies, support & community.

Register now at boysalive.com/boost

Use coupon code ONBOYS to save $50 (just $99 for all three sessions!)

If you’ve ever wanted to jump into the conversation with us — this is your chance.

Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:

Empowering Boys & Dyslexic Learners — ON BOYS episode

How Your Anxiety is Sabotaging Your Son’s Motivation — ON BOYS episode

Boost Boys’ Motivation — ON BOYS episode

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