Unchosen Paths: When Childlessness & Illness Brought Us Closer

In this tender conversation, Xander Peer Keller and their longtime friend Amy reflect on 20 years of friendship shaped by disability, queerness, sickness, and unchosen paths. Together they explore:

• Unchosen paths — navigating childlessness and incurable illness

• Interdependence in practice — what it means to build and sustain a care web

• Friendship through rupture and repair — lessons from 20 years of showing up

• Invisible grief — losses that aren’t always seen or understood by others

• Receiving care — moving past fear of being “needy” into worthiness and reciprocity

With honesty and vulnerability, they share what it means to mother without children, to live inside an ill body, and to trust that community and support can make survival feel like flourishing.

Stay tender. Stay tangled. Stay held together.

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Find Xander Peer Keller:
On Instagram @xanderpeerkeller and linked here.
On Facebook linked here.
And on TikTok @queercripmagic and linked here.
Read their writing on Substack at xanderpeerkeller.substack.com/ linked here.
Visit their website at disabilitycreativity.com linked here.
Check out Sirona Isle's music on Spotify and linked here!
Email us at [e-mail]