After 16 months living homeless in my car, I self-admitted to a psychiatric hospital in Boulder, Colorado. This is my first diary entry from inside—January 7, 2025, exactly one year ago this week.

I share what led to admission, the process itself, and why I didn't feel worthy of the care I was receiving.

If you've ever felt unseen, emotionally offline, or quietly overwhelmed while life kept moving—this may feel familiar.

⚠️ Crisis resources: 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline | Call or text 988 | 988lifeline.org

I'm not a therapist. This is only my experience being shared.

Read the full transcript: https://berchman.substack.com

The job hunt isn't just exhausting—it's emotionally brutal. In this episode of Transmission_X, I share what it’s like to apply for over 1,500 jobs in today’s digital job market and how the constant rejection impacts your mental health.This is a real, unfiltered look at the intersection of job searching and mental health—the burnout, the doubt, and why I still keep showing up.👉 Timestamps:00:00 – The job hunt grind01:00 – Rejection fatigue & feeling invisible03:00 – Mental toll of job search cycles04:00 – Losing confidence05:00 – Why I keep going🔑 Keywords:job hunt mental health, job search burnout, mental health during job search, applying for jobs online, job rejection depression, AI job search tips, emotional toll of job hunting, how to stay motivated in job search🎧 Listen on Spotify, Apple & more: Transmission_X Podcast 🔥 Support the show & get extras: Patreon.com/[yourpatreonname 📹 Watch AI builds in action: Modern AI Web Machine YouTube Channel💬 Leave a comment if you’ve felt the burnout too. You’re not alone—and you don’t have to disappear.----------------------------------------------------------🎙 Listen to Transmission-X Podcast (4–7 episodes per week)!📌 Subscribe & Follow the Journey! → https://www.youtube.com/@ModernAIWebMachine🌐 Explore More:🔗 AI-Powered Mental Health Art Business → bert.forsale👤 Personal Site → http://berchman.com/💼 Professional Site → http://bertmahoney.com/👉 Support the journey & unlock exclusive content:💜 Patreon → http://patreon.com/bertforsale#TechJourney #mentalhealthawarness #jobhunt #mentalhealth #TransmissionX #jobsearchburnout #digitaljobsearch #rejectionfatigue #creativecareers #resilience #aiandcareer #modernaiwebmachine #AI #WebDevelopment #webdesign #automation #IndieHacker

They won’t say it out loud, but you can feel it.

The rejections come faster—or not at all.

The interviews are polite, cold, over before they even begin.

If you’ve ever struggled to find work after a certain age, this episode of TransmissionX is for you.

📉 Inside this episode:

✅ The hidden bias of ageism in hiring – How experience is treated as a liability

✅ The brutal job search – 1,600+ applications, countless rejections, and ghosting

✅ The mental toll – When you start questioning your own worth

✅ Why companies lose out on talent by prioritizing youth over experience

💡 What this means for you:If you’ve been told you’re “overqualified,” if you’ve started hiding your experience just to get a shot—you’re not alone.

Experience isn’t a liability. It’s everything.

📢 Join the conversation.

Have you faced ageism in your career?

Share your story in the comments.

Subscribe for more real, unfiltered discussions.

🔗 Visit BERT.forsale for mental health awareness artwork & AI-powered resources.

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🎙 Subscribe + Listen to Transmission-X Podcast (4-7 episodes per week)!https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLgVdeaYJeOiO-kfSHIEuwszG8wfgbRkH3

🎥 Watch more at Modern AI Web Machine on YouTube. New Videos Every Week!

📌 Subscribe & Follow the Journey! → https://www.youtube.com/@ModernAIWebMachine

🌐 Explore More:

🔗 AI-Powered Mental Health Art Business → bert.forsale

👤 Personal Site → [berchman.com](http://berchman.com/)

💼 Professional Site → [bertmahoney.com](http://bertmahoney.com/)

👉 Support the journey & unlock exclusive content:

💜 Patreon → [patreon.com/bertforsale](http://patreon.com/bertforsale)

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#AgeismInWorkplace #JobSearchStruggles #OverqualifiedAndUnemployed #CareerAfter50 #WorkplaceDiscrimination #JobMarketRealities #SurvivalMindset #ModernAIWebMachine #TransmissionX #PersonalGrowth #OvercomingRejection #FindingYourWorth #MentalHealthAwareness #CareerResilience #TechForGood #genx #genxpodcast #MentalHealth #AI #TransmissionX #MentalHealthAwareness #LifeAfterLayoff #FindingYourWorth #PodcastLife #ModernAIWebMachine #EcommerceAI #TechForGood