This week, we’re getting into 2002’s D-Tox, or as you may also know it, Eye See You. It’s a Stallone slasher! Yes, your eyes are not deceiving you.

Adriannnnn!!!

Sad Sly sucking spirits, sent to s’perimental safehouse seeking salvation, s’periencing slasher stuff, and ‘scapin unscathed! Whispering distance! Boozers in blue! The angry black captain trope! Cop killer continuation at the concrete cop carnival! Demeaning test screening sent production careening! Side slopping the night away! Home cookin’, home fuckin’, and the FBI! Cabin rendezvous with Mrs. Sexy Medicine! Big ole Wyoming wind! Kristofferson’s cartilage conundrum. Robert Patrick is the shit storm! Whoop whoop in the walk-in? Offensive addiction, depiction fiction, and much, much more on this week’s episode of The Worst Movie Ever Made!

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This week, we’re going to get into 1992’s Split Second. We feel like this movie has to follow its own set of rules. Is it low-budget? You betcha. Does it have more cheese than an unwashed belly-button? Absolutely. Is it great? Hell fucking yes! This movie has a lot of problems, but it’s from a bygone era where the VHS ruled the landscape, and this is a perfect late-night watch despite its shortcomings. Why are we doing this then? Because we need a control in the experiment that allows us to keep flushing TC 2000 down the toilet.

Hauer’s Harley hassles harlots, hoping the heart-stealer in hiding’s hellacious hackles hear his heroism! Hogtie the bad guy! Heart blood trails! Really sneak Venomorphs! Oops all coconut? Strip club English breakfast! Durkin Dick breaches the door too quick! Unrealistic armadas! 60 ducklings worth of Dawn! A little extra turtle to it, and much, much more on this week’s episode of The Worst Movie Ever Made!

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Don’t be fooled this week because it’s actually a bad movie week. According to Rotten Tomatoes anyway. This week, we’re going to talk about From Paris with Love, which has a punishing 37% approval rating on the review aggregator. Here’s the thing though: The critics don’t know dick about shit! This movie rules, and it’s the best. Science is on our side, and while it’s not a good movie, season finale week, it certainly feels like it this time around!

Wax on, wax off! Charlie Wax, that is!

Travolta trounces triads, tackles terrorists, trades ‘telligence, and tactically terminates with a tude! Poopin’ dragons! The “damn, he’s good” trope done right! French concubine’s curtain coverup! James Reese’s gum fumbles! Coke house recitals! Shootout in the mannequin factory! Uma boob references are out of control! We’ll go with convoy, and much, much more on this week’s episode of The Worst Movie Ever Made!

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