The Weight I’ve Carried: Running, Healing & Rewriting My Story

Episode Summary

This week’s solo episode is one of my most vulnerable yet. What started as a simple half marathon became something I never expected - a release of 21 years of body shame, childhood conditioning, disordered eating, and the belief that my worth was always tied to my weight.

I talk about growing up between two homes, using food for comfort, being bullied, losing weight as a teenager and suddenly being treated differently… and how all of this shaped the way I see myself even now. Running became my turning point - not because I’m a runner, but because crossing that finish line cracked something open in me.

If you’ve ever struggled with food, your body, or the stories you were told about yourself growing up, I hope this one lands gently with you.

Trigger warnings: Body dysmorphia, bullying, disordered eating, mental health themes.

Show notes

In this solo episode, I explore:

• How my half marathon became an emotional breakthrough
• Growing up with food as comfort and control
• The moment teenage weight loss changed how people treated me
• Why Slimming World became both a lifeline and a lifelong mindset
• My journey through body dysmorphia, restriction and self-worth
• How running — from Couch to 5K to 13.1 miles — helped me untangle my relationship with myself
• The battle between fuelling your body and fearing weight gain
• What I wish I could tell younger Bethany
• Why so many millennial women still hear the same old stories in their heads
• Running cracked open 21 years of body shame

Key Takeaways

• Childhood conditioning shapes adult self-worth
• Weight-loss validation created long-term dysmorphia
• Food became control instead of comfort
• Training forced a healing around fuelling instead of fearing
• Achievements hit differently when your younger self never felt enough
• You’re not defined by your weight or your body
• Healing is slow, messy and nonlinear
• You can always rewrite your story