The Trap (S2 E8)

Question - "I'm never going to find her easy but how do I regulate after exposure to her?"

In this episode, we hear from a listener - an only child - who has spent a lifetime navigating exhaustion, guilt, and confusion in her relationship with her aging mother.

Her mother calls her “my everything,” professes deep love, yet never asks about her life or family. Instead, she elicits promises, plays the victim, uses guilt to control, and bends the truth to suit her narrative.

For this listener, going no contact isn’t an option. So she’s learning to hold firmer boundaries — limiting visits, stepping back from constant caretaking, and seeing the manipulation for what it is — but still battles the heavy weight of guilt and self-doubt: “Am I being too harsh?”

With growing self-awareness and hard-won clarity, she asks a powerful question: "How do I regulate better when with her - and after?"

Together, Ruth and I explore how to stay grounded in contact with a narcissistic parent, how to recover from the emotional crash afterward, and how true healing often means redefining love, responsibility, and self-worth on your own terms.

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