The Silent Way Parents Damage Their Child’s Confidence (And Don’t Even Know It)

You think you’re teaching your kids discipline, but what if what they’re really learning is “I’m not good enough”?

In this episode of Notes To My Nervous System, child therapist TJ Amos explains everyday parenting phrases like “Why can’t you be like your sibling?” or “How many times do I have to tell you?” quietly shape a child’s nervous system, teaching them shame instead of safety.

You’ll learn:

• How unspoken messages shape your child’s self-worth

• What “correction over connection” does to a child’s nervous system

• Simple ways to help kids process big transitions like divorce, moving, or school changes

• Why play isn’t just fun, it’s how kids regulate and make sense of the world

• How to model calm so your child feels safe in their own body

If you’ve ever wondered why your child shuts down, acts out, or says “I’m bad,” this episode will help you see what’s really happening beneath the behavior.

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