The Hidden Trauma of Male Rape | Consent, Myths & Healing

Male rape remains one of the most silenced and misunderstood forms of sexual trauma. In this powerful episode of The Aspiring Psychologist Podcast, Dr Marianne Trent speaks with Connor Whiteley, clinical psychology master’s student and host of The Psychology World Podcast, who courageously shares his lived experience of male sexual violence.

Together, they explore the realities of male rape, the consent myths that keep survivors silent, and why understanding shame and recovery is vital for healing. The conversation tackles misconceptions about erections, freezing during assault, and why men often struggle to seek help or report what has happened.

Connor also shares his recovery journey — from denial and panic attacks to seeking specialist trauma therapy — and offers practical advice for survivors, mental-health professionals, and allies.

This episode sheds light on a taboo topic and invites us to build a culture of compassion, safety, and understanding for all survivors of sexual trauma. Whether you’re a psychologist, therapist, trainee, student, or survivor, this conversation will deepen your insight into consent, trauma, and healing.

Content note: We discuss sexual violence in clear, respectful language. Please take care while listening. If you need support, consider contacting SARSAS, SurvivorsUK, Rape Crisis England & Wales, or your local service.

Timestamps:

• 00:00 – Introduction: Breaking the silence on male rape
• 01:08 – Safety warning and trigger guidance
• 02:32 – How common is male sexual violence?
• 05:00 – Media representation and harmful myths
• 06:57 – Understanding the freeze response
• 07:44 – Why “enthusiastic consent” matters
• 09:15 – Challenging stereotypes and gender myths
• 11:18 – The truth about erections and consent
• 13:33 – Therapeutic reflections and global examples
• 15:42 – Healing, therapy, and coping strategies
• 19:46 – Integrating trauma into recovery
• 20:47 – Reporting to police and physical aftercare
• 21:45 – De-shaming and self-compassion in recovery
• 24:45 – Final reflections and resources

Links:

📲 www.connorwhiteley.net/podcast

📚Healing Sexual Trauma Workbook by Erika Shershun: https://amzn.to/48DMaxn

📚 Books by Connor Whiteley: https://amzn.to/47f6Zgc

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