Reframing ‘Otherness’: A Conversation with Lana Manikowski

In our latest episode, we talk with author and coach Lana Manikowski about the experience of being “othered” as a woman without children. Lana describes how years of infertility led her to a new purpose: helping others define their lives beyond parenthood.

She speaks openly about shame, resilience, and the importance of investing in yourself — whether that means therapy, journaling, or creating community. Lana also shares the story of founding Others Day Brunch, an annual event that offers connection and celebration for those who feel isolated around Mother’s Day.

Lana Manikowski is an author, certified life coach, and infertility advocate dedicated to helping women thrive after infertility. She is the founder of The Other’s Day Brunch and host of The ‘So Now What?’ Podcast, creating spaces where childless women feel seen, understood, and empowered.

After a seven-year journey through fertility treatments that ended without a child, Lana experienced the isolation, self-judgment, and grief of navigating a future she never planned for. When she couldn’t find the support she needed, she built it herself. Now, through her coaching, advocacy efforts, and community outreach, she helps women rediscover their relevance, connection, and purpose beyond motherhood.

With an advanced coaching certification in grief and post-traumatic growth, Lana helps women process the loss of the dream of motherhood and move forward with intention. Her coaching program, Thrive After Infertility, guides women in rebuilding relationships and creating meaningful milestones that bring fulfillment in the decades ahead.

Her book So Now What?, a #1 New Release on Amazon, offers a transformative roadmap for embracing life beyond infertility, helping women reclaim joy, meaning, and a sense of belonging without the children longed for. A sought-after speaker and media contributor, Lana is known for her powerful message: your story isn’t over, it’s just beginning. She lives in downtown Chicago with her husband and their furbaby, Coco.

Download The Top 27 Things People Say When You Are Childless (...and how to respond). It ties perfectly into our conversation about othering because people with kids often love to offer suggestions for what we should be doing to achieve parenthood instead of acknowledging that we have already done what we are capable of. We know our bodies, our journeys, and our limits when it comes to what we choose to do or not do. I am also teaching a free masterclass on this in September. You can get the free guide here: So Now What?, my first book, came out in April. Berenice wrote one of the endorsements and Jody Day wrote the foreword. So Now What? is about creating a life you love without the children you always dreamed of. It is the guide I wish my fertility clinic had offered me when my seven years of IVF ended without a baby. There’s a free giveaway with a download of Jody’s foreword and Chapter 1, which shares the story of the day I got the call from my doctor telling me my last and only frozen embryo was chromosomally abnormal. Download your copy from my website.

In this conversation, we’re joined by Anne Barratt from Empowering Health who discusses her holistic approach to health, focusing on kinesiology and its role in understanding individual experiences of menopause and childlessness. Anne encourages listeners to embrace their femininity and creativity, highlighting that ageing is not an end but a new beginning.

After two decades in corporate marketing—and many hope-filled years of trying to become a mother—Anne’s dream of having children came to an abrupt and heartbreaking end. From that deep void of grief, she chose to rise. Determined to understand the “why” behind her journey, she immersed herself in personal healing and became qualified in a range of disciplines, including holistic health and counselling.

Anne turned her own life around and went on to “birth” her business—a way to support others through emotional healing, life transitions, and creating lasting wellbeing. Her work is rooted in personal transformation, resilience, and a deep desire to help others break free from emotional pain, disconnection, and burnout.

Inspired by her fertility journey and the grief of childlessness, Anne redefined what legacy means. Today, she channels that energy into helping women reconnect to their intuition, body wisdom, and soul truth—so they can rediscover joy, clarity, and a renewed sense of purpose. While she doesn’t specialise in deep trauma recovery, Anne gently guides her clients toward powerful “aha” moments, emotional breakthroughs, and energetic alignment to help them move forward.

Instagram: @empowering_health / @empoweringhealthau Website: empoweringhealth.clinic

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In Episode 76, Berenice, Michael, and Sarah have the conversation they’ve avoided for six years: what happens after failed IVF. With raw honesty and compassion, we explore the emotional aftermath of a process that’s gruelling, often isolating, and rarely discussed when it doesn't lead to parenthood.

We reflect on grief, lost identities, anger at misleading success rates, the mental and financial toll, and the uncomfortable silence surrounding childlessness after IVF. This episode holds space for everyone who has ever felt abandoned by the system, and those seeking to understand.