Grief is something most of us will encounter, yet it remains rarely talked about. It can follow the death of someone we love, but also the loss of health, identity or relationships. When grief arrives, it often brings a complex mix of emotions that feel overwhelming or unexpected.

In this episode, Dr Lee David speaks with Professor Lucy Selman – a leading researcher in palliative and end-of-life care at the University of Bristol and founder of the Good Grief Festival – about what grief really is and how we can better understand and support it.

They explore grief as a natural human response rather than a mental health problem, looking at why it can involve emotions far beyond sadness, including anger, guilt, shame and relief. Lucy explains how grief is shaped by relationships, culture and identity, and why naming grief can bring relief and permission to respond with compassion rather than self-judgement.

The conversation also challenges common myths about grief – including the idea that it follows a neat timeline – and introduces the dual process model to explain how people move between mourning and everyday life. Together, they reflect on the importance of connection, self-care and practical support, as well as when additional help may be needed.

This is a discussion about making space for grief, understanding its many forms and finding ways to live alongside loss with kindness and flexibility.

Key moments

00:00 Why we struggle to talk openly about grief
02:13 What grief is and the many forms loss can take
04:50 Naming grief and why it brings relief
09:46 Understanding grief with the dual process model
13:25 Guilt, self-blame and compassion in bereavement
16:49 How we start making sense of loss
20:19 Why grief isn’t linear
23:52 Noticing loss with compassion
26:12 When grief becomes more complex and support is needed
30:17 Day-to-day self-care during grief
34:23 How to support someone who is grieving
40:12 Presence, compassion and practical support

About the guest

Lucy Selman is professor of palliative and end of life care at the University of Bristol. She has spent over 20 years researching psychosocial and spiritual aspects of serious illness, communication and decision-making, family caregiving and bereavement. Her work focuses on grief and how people are supported through illness and loss. Lucy is on LinkedIn and X.

The Good Grief Festival (Website, Instagram, LinkedIn) offers courses for bereaved people and professionals, including a new course for GPs and primary care clinicians.

About the host

Dr Lee David is a GP, CBT therapist and author specialising in mental health and wellbeing. Lee has written many books on CBT, mindfulness and teen wellbeing, and speaks regularly at conferences and in the media. Away from work she enjoys running, hiking, singing in a choir and spending time outdoors with her family. You can find Lee through her website and on Instagram, TikTok (@dr.lee.david), Facebook and LinkedIn. You can find more about her books, wellbeing courses and therapy here: https://linktr.ee/dr.lee.david

Christmas is often portrayed as joyful and effortless, yet many families experience something far more complex. Sensory overload, disrupted routines and shifting expectations can build pressure quickly, and for neurodivergent families these challenges can be especially pronounced. Old roles and stories can also resurface, adding emotional weight to a time that comes with more noise, movement and change than usual.

In this episode, Dr Lee David speaks with Dr Lucy Rigley – clinical psychologist and specialist in neurodivergence and family wellbeing – about why Christmas can feel demanding and the small, workable choices that can make it easier.

They explore sensory differences, routine changes, how family dynamics can intensify at this time of year and why preparation and acceptance can ease overwhelm. Lucy offers practical ways to balance different needs within a household, communicate with wider family members and create traditions that support wellbeing rather than trying to match external expectations.

This is a conversation about understanding real needs within a family – and letting go of pressure so there is more room for calm, connection and authenticity in a season that can feel busy for everyone.

Highlights & key moments

00:00 Introduction – why Christmas brings hidden pressures
00:36 The sensory load of the festive season
07:15 Balancing varied needs within a neurodivergent household
10:38 Co-regulation and why adults’ wellbeing shapes the day
14:25 Future-you planning and small choices that ease pressure
17:02 Involving children in problem-solving and creative ideas
18:27 Social media, comparison and finding people who get your life
23:21 Authenticity over perfection – celebrating real family moments
28:36 Communicating with wider family without escalating conflict
34:43 Naming disappointment and making space for mixed feelings
36:18 Routines, safe spaces and reducing festive demands
39:14 Choice Space Takeaway – acceptance and preparation for calmer days

About the guest

Dr Lucy Rigley is a clinical psychologist, therapist, trainer and lecturer with over a decade of experience supporting people and organisations around mental health and neurodivergence. After working in the NHS since 2013, Lucy now runs an independent practice offering therapy, assessment and consultation for children, families and neurodivergent people. Her work focuses on autism, ADHD, trauma and parenting – helping individuals, families and systems such as schools to understand needs with compassion. Alongside clinical work, Lucy lectures and trains practitioners, and is committed to making psychology accessible through workshops and community projects, including parent wellbeing sessions in play cafés.

You can contact Lucy via her website, Instagram (@drlucy.co.uk) or

About the host

Dr Lee David is a GP, CBT therapist and author specialising in mental health and wellbeing. Lee has written many books on CBT, mindfulness and teen wellbeing, and speaks regularly at conferences and in the media. Away from work she enjoys running, hiking, singing in a choir and spending time outdoors with her family. You can find Lee through her website and on Instagram, TikTok (@dr.lee.david), Facebook and LinkedIn. You can find more about her books, wellbeing courses and therapy here: https://linktr.ee/dr.lee.david

In support of #NHSDAAD – NHS Domestic Abuse Awareness Day on 10 December 2025

Domestic abuse is an issue that affects people across every part of society – including those who work in healthcare. Many clinicians quietly carry experiences of fear, control or unpredictability while still showing up to care for others. Rates of domestic abuse are thought to be around three times higher in health professionals than in the general population, yet it can remain hidden and hard to talk about.

In this episode, Dr Lee David speaks with Dr Anoushka George – Manchester GP and member of a national advisory group improving domestic abuse awareness in healthcare – about the realities facing clinicians who are surviving abuse. Together they talk about why recognising what’s happening can be so difficult, how subtle patterns can build over time and the pressures that make it harder for clinicians to reach out for support.

They explore the role of shame, fears around judgement or professional reputation, worries about confidentiality and the internal pressure many clinicians feel to cope alone. They also discuss what can help: noticing early signs, keeping factual records, speaking with trusted people, accessing safe and confidential support and offering gentle conversations when we’re concerned about a colleague.

This is a compassionate, practical conversation about understanding the realities faced by health professionals living with domestic abuse – and about creating space for recognition, care and safer choices when someone feels ready.

About the guest

Dr Anoushka George is a GP in Manchester with a strong commitment to improving awareness and education around domestic abuse in healthcare. Since 2022, she has been part of a national advisory group working to highlight abuse within the healthcare workforce, and build collaboration across key organisations, including RCGP, NHS Practitioner Health, BMA, GMC, RMBF and IRISi. You can connect with her on LinkedIn.

Support and information about domestic abuse

Doctors Association UK: NHS Domestic Abuse Resources

Women’s aid

NHS Practitioner Health

Refuge

National Domestic Abuse Helpline

SafeLives

Bright Sky app

Phrida study

About the host

Dr Lee David is a GP, CBT therapist and author specialising in mental health and wellbeing. Lee has written many books on CBT, mindfulness and teen wellbeing, and speaks regularly at conferences and in the media. Away from work she enjoys running, hiking, singing in a choir and spending time outdoors with her family. You can find Lee through her website and on Instagram, TikTok (@dr.lee.david), Facebook and LinkedIn. You can find more about her books, wellbeing courses and therapy here: https://linktr.ee/dr.lee.david