The Ashes

I’ll rise from ashes, I always have. God found me, in my darkest moment. I’m not afraid of fire, when my whole world was on fire. Being sexually, mentally, physically and verbally abused by someone two weeks before I was thirteen. I wasn’t related to this person and I never blamed my parents, but I was still blamed for it. Being baptized six months after this, the guilt was eating me alive. A lifetime will never heal the pain, when the flashbacks come back when I least expect it. No one speaks up about the “survivals guilt” because we are never taken seriously or it’s just for sympathy, so we choose to suffer in silence instead. This type of trauma is a form of ptsd and can trigger Fibromyalgia. My life is more peaceful but it doesn’t mean that the damage doesn’t remain. I chose to share my life to be a survivals guide to help others.