The 4 money personalities that shape how you save, spend, and fight about money

Money fights aren’t really about money. They’re about expectations, and how differently we respond to them. In this episode of Making Cents, I’m breaking down the four money personalities that shape how you save, spend, budget, and argue about money. Get ready to finally understand why financial advice works brilliantly for some people and completely falls apart for others. Based on Gretchen Rubin’s Four Tendencies framework, these personalities explain why: You can know what to do with your money… and still not do it Your partner’s approach makes perfect sense to them, but drives you mad Discipline isn’t the issue, but mismatched systems are. You’ll learn how the Upholder, Questioner, Obliger, and Rebel money personalities actually behave with money, where each one thrives, where it goes wrong, and what strategies genuinely work for each type. We also dig into how different money personalities clash (and connect) in relationships. Why money is such a common source of tension, and how to design shared systems that don’t leave one person feeling controlled, rushed, unsupported, or sabotaged. Follow me everywhere! Facebook / https://www.facebook.com/FrancesCookNZ Instagram / https://www.instagram.com/francescooknz TikTok / https://www.tiktok.com/@francescooknz Join the Money Memo newsletter for a free weekly money tip in your inbox each week https://www.francescook.co.nz/subscribe This podcast was filmed & produced by Fanaticals Video editing & content production by Lana Byrne Audio engineering by Tash Chittock #MakingCents #FrancesCook #moneypersonality #moneymindset #financialpsychology #financialfreedom #FourTendencies #Upholder #Questioner #Obliger #Rebel Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction 00:03:11 The upholder: the goody two shoes who follow all the rules 00:05:58 The questioner: research everything, customize everything 00:10:54 The obliger: brilliant for others, terrible at prioritizing themselves 00:13:51 The rebel: identity over obligations 00:17:33 Why most money advice is written for upholders 00:18:27 Money personalities in relationships: why couples fight about expectations 00:20:49 Wrapping up: stop fighting yourself and design systems that fit 00:21:08 Outro