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Welcome back our guest Sandra Killebrew, a therapist specializing in high-conflict couples therapy in Seattle, WA. This episode dives into the messy, magical work of being a therapist. We unpack what happens when clients come in with chaos—blame throwers in hand—and how playfulness, props, and presence can shift the energy in the room. From adolescent therapy and couples work to private pay dilemmas and therapist boundaries, we explore the art of staying human while holding space.

Topics include:

• The “blame thrower” metaphor and how to manage chaotic energy
• Using props and playfulness to disarm resistance and build trust
• Working with teens: safety, attunement, and how to not take the bait
• Couples therapy, contempt, and staying grounded in the storm
• Therapist self-awareness: when over-identifying does more harm than good
• Navigating private pay vs. insurance expectations
• What happens when clients want therapy to “fix” someone else
• The loneliness of solo practice and the beauty of professional community
• Energetic integrity: how we show up when the room feels off

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Have any questions or insights about this episode? Reach out to us at contactus@tellmeaboutyourmother.run

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Welcome our guest, Rhiana Holmes Turner, LPC, LAC, is a licensed mental health professional and Approved Clinical Supervisor based in Denver, Colorado, with multi-state licensure across Colorado, Florida, Texas, and Kansas. She has expertise in trauma-informed, care and a career spanning community advocacy, international mental health work, and psychopharmacology education, Turner brings a unique lens to this raw and resonant conversation.

In this episode of Tell Me About Your Mother, Evan and Rhiana open up about their work with some of the most misunderstood populations — from genocide survivors in Cambodia to clients who have committed murder. The discussion explores what it means to show up authentically as a therapist, the projections therapists carry, and the radical empathy required to do the work well.

Topics include:

• Working with genocide survivors in Cambodia and unintentional publication
• Narrative therapy and reintegration between victims and perpetrators
• Coercion, moral ambiguity, and the psychology of violence
• Treating clients who have killed someone — and confronting therapist bias
• Rejection-prevention behaviors and shame in clinical relationships
• Blank slate therapists vs. authenticity and immediacy
• Attachment dynamics, regulation, and what actually makes couples therapy work
• The universal human need to feel loved, accepted, and safe — even for therapists

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Have any questions or insights about this episode? Reach out to us at contactus@tellmeaboutyourmother.run

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In this raw and wide-ranging episode of Tell Me About Your Mother, Evan and Melissa explore what it means to be a therapist, parent, and human being—flawed, opinionated, and under pressure to perform. From setting boundaries on the soccer field to navigating adolescent risk-taking and drug use, the conversation covers the deep discomfort of losing control, the power of regulation, and the dangers of sanitized professionalism.

Topics include:

• Why regulating yourself is the most powerful parenting move
• The limits of behavioral control in adolescence
• The dark side of data, AI, and digital permanence
• Why therapists shouldn’t have to apologize for being human
• Self-diagnosis trends and the loss of clinical nuance

Whether you’re a clinician, a parent, or just someone trying not to lose it in public—this episode is your permission slip.

Support the show

Have any questions or insights about this episode? Reach out to us at contactus@tellmeaboutyourmother.run