Soulmates Don’t Exist: But Great Sex and Better Standards Do

In this episode of The Wrong Ones, we’re breaking up with one of the most romanticized — and misleading — ideas in modern dating: the soulmate myth. From the “readiness” lie to the science behind why heartbreak feels like a broken bone, we unpack why believing in the one can actually hold you back from finding love that’s real, healthy, and sustainable.

In this episode, we cover:

• How to tell if you’re genuinely ready to start dating again (and why “ready” isn’t a magical morning announcement from the universe).

• The neuroscience of heartbreak, emotional regulation, and why your nervous system knows before your mind does.

• The cultural origins of the soulmate myth and the psychological traps it creates.

• Why letting go of “the one” opens the door to better, freer, and more abundant love.

• Personal stories of past relationships that felt like fate — and what they really taught about love, growth, and self-worth.

Blending humor, storytelling, and research from psychology, neuroscience, and relationship science, this episode is both a reality check and a permission slip: you don’t only get one great love story. You get many—and the next beautiful connection might arrive out of nowhere, long after you thought the best was behind you.

Reflection Question of the Week:

Think about one of the most beautiful connections you’ve ever had. How would it feel to trust that your next beautiful connection will arrive just as unexpectedly?

Resources Mentioned:

• Clinical Psychology Review (2021) study on emotional regulation and relationship readiness

• Fisher et al. (2010) research on heartbreak and the brain’s reward system

• Knee et al. (2003) on destiny belief and relationship disengagement

• Boss (1999) on ambiguous loss

• Aron et al. (1997) on creating closeness with strangers

• Neuroplasticity research from Doidge (2007)

• Oxytocin and cortisol research (Ditzen et al., 2007)

• Companionate love study in Social Psychological and Personality Science (2012)

----- As always: if you’re enjoying the show, please take a moment to follow, rate, and subscribe — it truly helps us grow and reach more listeners.

Come say hi on Instagram @thewrongonespodcast

An Operation Podcast production.