Want to be a guest or know someone would be a great fit? I am looking for military vets, active duty, military brats, veteran service orgs or anyone in the fitness industry

The silence surrounding Military Sexual Trauma has perpetuated a crisis affecting thousands of service members each year. Navy veteran Jean Ibanez Payne breaks that silence with raw courage in this powerful conversation about survival, advocacy, and reclaiming personal worth.

From her first traumatic experience shortly after boot camp to facing over 20 instances of sexual abuse during her service, Jean reveals how the military's response system failed her at every turn. When she reported her first assault, she was treated as the offender while her abuser received minimal consequences. This pattern of institutional betrayal forced her into decades of silent suffering.

"Nobody knew what I had been through, not even my husband," Jean shares, describing how she maintained an outward appearance of success while battling anxiety, depression, and suicidal ideation for twenty years. Her breaking point came in December 2022, when she finally decided to take ownership of her recovery through therapy, medication, and lifestyle changes.

Jean's healing journey led her to write "Reclaim Your Worth," a memoir she completed in just one month that serves both as personal therapy and as a beacon for other survivors. More remarkably, she's now championing VA House Bill 2520 in Virginia, which would establish an independent sexual offense prevention program to protect service members from the conflicts of interest that currently plague military investigations.

The statistics are staggering—Brown University found approximately 75,000 cases of military sexual abuse while the Pentagon reported only 29,000. This dramatic underreporting underscores the urgent need for the independent oversight Jean advocates for in every state.

For those currently suffering, Jean offers this powerful truth: "It's never too late to reclaim your worth, but it's important that you do it on your own terms. Unless you take ownership of your journey, you'll never be able to heal." Her story reminds us that while systems may fail, personal resilience and the courage to speak up can create meaningful change.

Support the show

Want to be a guest or know someone would be a great fit? I am looking for military vets, active duty, military brats, veteran service orgs or anyone in the fitness industry

Thirty-three years ago, I broke free from a habit that was slowly deteriorating my health—smoking. What began as a way to fit in as a new military mom gradually became an addiction that threatened to bring recurring bronchitis into my life each year. The journey to quit wasn't straightforward, and it certainly wasn't my first attempt.

In this deeply personal episode, I share the strategies that finally helped me succeed where previous attempts had failed. The key wasn't willpower alone—it was understanding my "why," creating systems for accountability, finding alternatives to keep my hands busy, and celebrating each small victory along the way. I discovered that breaking any addictive habit requires recognizing it's not just a "bad habit" but a genuine addiction that needs a thoughtful approach.

Whether you're struggling with cigarettes, sugar, shopping, or any other addictive behavior, the principles remain the same. Start by understanding your triggers and motivations. Reduce gradually rather than attempting cold turkey. Find an accountability partner who asks the right questions without judgment. Most importantly, string together days of success and celebrate each one—because overcoming addiction is a journey, not a destination. After three decades of freedom from smoking, I still mark my quit anniversary every August. What habit might you break free from by applying these same principles? Your journey toward a healthier life can begin today, one small victory at a time.

Support the show

Want to be a guest or know someone would be a great fit? I am looking for military vets, active duty, military brats, veteran service orgs or anyone in the fitness industry

What happens when military precision meets the messy reality of motherhood? First Lieutenant Jasmine Murphy knows firsthand as she navigates the complex terrain of being an active-duty Army Intelligence Officer, historian, mother, and women's advocate. Her journey from enlisted Military Police to commissioned officer offers a masterclass in resilience and adaptation.

Lt. Murphy takes us back to her beginnings as a young Private – the only Black woman and one of just two Black people in her 40-person platoon. Rather than being intimidated, she built her reputation through excellence while being "treated like one of the guys." Today, with the wisdom of experience and formal education in Black American history, she recognizes her responsibility to help other women rise through the ranks. The transformation from competitive peer to supportive mentor represents her evolution as a leader.

Motherhood revolutionized Murphy's leadership approach. Once the "least empathetic person" who expected everyone to push through difficulties as she had, becoming a mother opened her eyes to the power of compassion and accommodation. She candidly shares how pregnancy and postpartum experiences made her a more understanding leader who recognizes that sometimes "you can't just thug it out." Her appreciation for the military's improved parental leave policies (from 12 days to 12 weeks for fathers, and 18 weeks total for mothers) highlights the positive changes in supporting military families.

The Legacy Framework, Murphy's signature approach to empowering ambitious women, helps them integrate motherhood, self-identity, and career without compromise. Based on historical awareness and authentic self-expression, it encourages women to define success on their own terms rather than society's timeline. For military members approaching transition, she advises exploring potential paths years before separation through classes, seminars, and networking opportunities.

Want to hear how one remarkable woman balances the demands of military service with the joys and challenges of motherhood while advocating for women everywhere? Listen now to discover insights that will change how you think about success, service, and self-fulfillment. Then share your own balancing act experiences in the comments – we'd love to hear from you!

info@iamjazminerenae.com

Support the show