Shifting From Compliance to Connection: The Power of Declarative Language in Supporting Kids

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We’re exploring a simple yet transformative shift in how we communicate with children facing social-emotional challenges: using declarative language.

I’ll break down exactly what declarative language is, how it differs from giving direct commands, and why this small change can make a big impact on fostering connection, self-reflection, and problem-solving skills in our kids. Drawing on resources like The Declarative Language Handbook by Linda Murphy and Communicating with Compassion by Bobbi Cook, we’ll share real-world examples, discuss both the benefits and the challenges of this approach, and bring in perspectives from autistic adults and parents.

In this episode you'll hear about:

• Understanding Declarative Language
• The Importance of Declarative Language
• Encouraging flexible thinking, problem solving, and social awareness
• Practical Examples of Declarative Language
• Sample statements from Linda Murphy’s work (The Declarative Language Handbook)
• The Shift from Compliance to Connection
• Personal Reflections and Related Experiences
• Early exposure to these communication strategies
• Tips for Starting with Declarative Language
• Navigating Common Challenges
• Considering Neurodivergent and Autistic Perspectives
• Addressing Parental Concerns and Objections

Links and Resources From Today's Show

• Why Should I Seek Occupational Therapy?
• When Declarative Language Doesn't Work
• When Declarative Language Activates The Nervous System
• Declarative Language Handbook
• Communicating With Compassion: By Bobbi Cook
• Episode 16: Navigating the Interoceptive Sense: Insights and Strategies for Parents
• Episode 32: Homeschooling During Crisis: Finding Balance with Self Care and Family Support
• Episode 50: Ask The OT, A Special 50th Episode