Living with ADHD in a neurotypical world is hard. It just is. But we don’t have to lose ourselves in shame and self-loathing when we can’t contort ourselves into the shapes society wants for us.

In this conversation with TT Hernandez, artist and trauma-informed coach for creative minds, we share about our journeys as late-in-life diagnosed ADHDers and how we found our way out of shame and burnout and into self-compassion and self-care.

A huge part of that process was un-shaming the ways that our quirky and magical ADHD brains operate and learning to embrace the inevitable life pivots that the universe throws at us… ideally learning to listen to the gentle nudges before getting hit upside the head with a two-by-four (or an actual softball, as was the case for TT!)

Read the transcript at: https://settlingisbullshit.com/2026/04/02/adhd-and-un-shaming-our-life-pivots-with-tt-hernandez/

Connect with TT

Visit her website: tthernandez.com

Follow her on Instagram: @the.tthernandez & @hall_lore_ween

Order her books!

• Hall-lore-ween (Book 1) https://a.co/d/eGi5Px5
• It’s Hall-lore-ween again! (Book 2) https://a.co/d/0MIbHM6

Resources, References, and Links

DSM-5 Criteria for ADHD – when they separated things out into inattentive and hyperactive.

Hyperfocus. “an intense fixation on an interest or activity for an extended period of time.”

Episode #48: Honoring Our Limitations.

Seven Grams. The short film TT illustrated.

Rejection sensitivity. An aspect of ADHD in which we are acutely attuned to potential (and real) rejection.

Body doubling. A simple but incredibly effective tool for ADHDers in which you simply have someone present with you while you work on difficult tasks.

How to ADHD. My favorite YouTube channel for understanding and coping with ADHD.

Any time we’re making changes in our lives, any time we’re learning something new, any time the universe throws us a curve ball – there’s usually a big chunk of mess we have to wade through to get to the other side. This episode goes out to anyone who’s feeling stuck in that muck.

Sometimes things are just shitty for a while. Sometimes we’re in limbo with nothing we can do about it. Sometimes we’re just bad at stuff while we try to get our feet back under us. And when we’re really just in it, that’s when we need an extra bit of help.

So, this episode is your pep talk for getting through the messy middle, for remembering that acceptance, community support, and cultivating hope are all tools you can reach for (even if you don’t feel like it).

Read the transcript at: https://settlingisbullshit.com/

Resources, References, and Links

The Insidious Grip of a Fixed Mindset https://settlingisbullshit.com/2025/08/13/the-insidious-grip-of-a-fixed-mindset/

Hope Isn’t a Feeling – It’s a Choice https://settlingisbullshit.com/2023/04/20/hope-isnt-a-feeling-its-a-choice/

Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE’s). Traumatic events that happen between the ages of 0-17. https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/symptoms/24875-adverse-childhood-experiences-ace

A reflection in the midst of heartache, this episode touches on what it means to be in relationship – with ourselves and with others (and with the pets that we have to eventually let go). There are costs to love – sometimes hidden, often overlooked, but almost always worth it.

Your invitation with this listen is to come home to the love within and to consciously choose to show up in love today – in whatever corner of your life needs it most.

Content note: I had to put my cat to sleep last week, and I talk about it here, though not in any detail. So this is also an episode about grief and gratitude.

Read the transcript at: https://settlingisbullshit.com/