Uncle Steve is back at the table armed with the usual Fox-flavored folklore: “schools are indoctrinating kids,” “it’s grooming,” “trans is a trend,” and the classic imaginary litter box story (because nothing says serious political thought like a viral hoax). We translate the subtext, fear, control, and borrowed children-as-shields, and then hand listeners a stack of boundary-setting comebacks that keep dinner from turning into a cable-news hostage situation.

Part two leans hard into the big-ticket holiday hits: the “God made male and female” bumper-sticker theology, the weaponized “mental illness” label, and the exhausting “I can’t keep up with pronouns” routine (spoiler: they can learn quinoa, but not basic respect). You also point out the recurring hypocrisy: if the crowd’s actually worried about kids, maybe panic less about “crotches” and more about, you know… school shootings. But sure, let’s pretend “Happy Holidays” is the real oppression.

And just when Steve tries to launch the War on Christmas™, you torch it with humor, practical redirects, and the reminder that “persecution” is not “a cashier used a generic greeting at Target.” Bonus detours include green bean casserole slander, “hide the pickle” lore, peanuts-in-the-stocking-toe traditions, and the exact kind of petty chaos that keeps your sanity intact. Now go eat something delicious and refuse to litigate human rights over gravy.

👉 Listen now at sacrilegiousdiscourse.com

👉 Join our godless rebellion on Discord: discord.gg/VBnyTYV6nC

👉 Support the snark on Patreon: patreon.com/sacrilegiousdiscourse

📌 Topics Covered:

• “Think of the kids!” as a convenient emotional shield (and how to call it out without flipping the table)
• The “indoctrination” panic… from people whose churches run kid-programming as a business model
• “It’s grooming” —what grooming actually is (hint: not “don’t bully people”)
• “Trans is a trend / social contagion” and why that language is just dehumanization in a lab coat
• “God made male and female” + “sinful” = theology-as-excuse for contempt (and why “love your neighbor” doesn’t have an asterisk)
• “I can’t keep up with pronouns” (a.k.a. selective incompetence as a personality)
• “You can’t even say Merry Christmas anymore” and other persecution fantasies
• “Christian America” claims, Founders context, and the “please shut up and pass the casserole” exit strategy

💬 Best Quote from the Episode (actual quote):

“You can learn the word quinoa, but you cannot keep up with pronouns.”

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It’s a Christmas Eve special, recorded on “Christmas Eve Eve” (aka “Christmas Steve Eve”), where Husband and Wife roleplay the dreaded holiday boss fight: Uncle Dude Bro (a.k.a. Steve) and Aunt Karen, armed with bumper-sticker theology, cable-news grievances, and the unstoppable urge to ruin the ham with culture-war nonsense.

The hosts roll out a grab bag of survival tactics: polite shut-downs, hard redirects (“Who made this pie? It is criminally delish.”), allyship call-outs, and the crowd-pleasing move, weaponizing the Bible back at Christians (because if they want “biblical marriage,” congrats, they just signed up for polygamy, concubines, and assorted Old Testament weirdness).

This episode’s greatest hits include responses to: “It’s Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve,” “I’m not homophobic, but…,” and “People are too sensitive.” Also: a cameo from Gen Z queer energy, point, laugh, and hit ’em with the “stinky” hand-wave, and a mini-rant about how these “just joking” lines are often code for “I’d like credit for being nice while saying something mean.”

👉 Listen now at sacrilegiousdiscourse.com

👉 Join our godless rebellion on Discord: discord.gg/VBnyTYV6nC

👉 Support the snark on Patreon: patreon.com/sacrilegiousdiscourse

📌 Topics Covered:

• “Adam & Eve, not Adam & Steve” — and how to shut it down without flipping the gravy boat
• Redirect magic: pie praise, Christmas movies, and “Die Hard is a Christmas movie” derailments
• The “I’m not homophobic, but…” disclaimer (aka the verbal airhorn before the bad take)
• Bible-based clapbacks: “traditional marriage” turns into a Leviticus-level mess real fast
• “People are too sensitive” — or maybe you’re just being a dick, Steve
• How to be an ally at the table without becoming the night’s designated punching bag
• When to set a boundary, when to walk away, and when to let silence do the stabbing

💬 Best Quote from the Episode:

“Let’s not do bumper sticker theology over dinner, Uncle Steve.”

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

1 Maccabees 11 is basically Game of Thrones if every character had the same three names and the narrator kept shouting “he” like it explains anything. Ptolemy rolls into Syria “with words of peace” (classic), plants garrisons everywhere (less peaceful), and then the whole Alexander–Cleopatra situation turns into a diplomatic soap opera where wives get traded like baseball cards and heads get mailed as party favors.

Meanwhile, Jonathan keeps doing what Jonathan does: besiege first, ask questions never, and then show up with a pile of shiny bribes like he’s trying to buy a VIP wristband to the Seleucid afterparty. Demetrius is mad… until he’s thrilled… until he’s mad again—because loyalty in this chapter lasts roughly the lifespan of a cheap candle. There’s also a glorious moment where the hosts basically scream into the void about how God is barely in this book, because this isn’t “divine providence,” it’s raw politics, opportunism, and dudes swapping crowns like Funko Pops.

And just when you think the chapter might settle down, it veers into citywide slaughter numbers, sudden revolts, Tryphon dragging a new Antiochus onto the stage (because of course), and a final battle where everyone runs away until Jonathan rage-prays and flips the script. If you like your Bible stories confusing, violent, and suspiciously modern in their power games—welcome home.

👉 Listen now at sacrilegiousdiscourse.com

👉 Join our godless rebellion on Discord: discord.gg/VBnyTYV6nC

👉 Support the snark on Patreon: patreon.com/sacrilegiousdiscourse

📌 Topics Covered:

• 1 Maccabees 11: the “who’s king this week?” chapter
• Ptolemy’s “peace tour” that somehow includes garrisons and conquest
• Cleopatra gets traded like a political coupon
• Alexander loses his head—literally—and the plot keeps sprinting
• Jonathan’s signature move: besiege + bribe + become besties
• Demetrius uses the Jews to save his throne… then immediately turns on them
• Tryphon + a new Antiochus = sequel bait nobody asked for
• The hosts’ running theme: Where the hell is God in all this?

💬 Best Quote from the Episode:

“If you stick your dick in enough holes, one of them might be a vagina.”

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.