S203 Boundaries = Safety: The Power of No with Amy Wilson

Kim Wardlow welcomes safety guide and advocate Amy Wilson to unpack why boundaries are a core safety skill—not just physically, but mentally and emotionally. Amy reframes “self-defense” to start with psychological safety: dignity, clarity, and the right to say no without apology. Together they tackle common myths (“I’m not allowed to set boundaries”), how to spot when your limits are too loose or weaponized, and what to do when people don’t respect your “no.”
Key takeaways: clarity is kindness, no is a complete sentence, and accountability is empowering—especially in a community where “instrumental aggression” (withholding help to force compliance) can show up. Amy shares practical reps for confidence (practice out loud, role-play with safe people, set one boundary first) and reminds listeners that seasons change—and so can your circle. Next week: home safety with smart tools and practical adaptations.

Contact Info
Guest/Org: Amy Wilson — Safety Positive Foundation — https://safetypositivefdn.org
Community & Feedback (Aftersight): [e-mail]
• [phone] • https://aftersight.org
Producer Credits: Produced by Jonathan Price for Aftersight

Show Credits
Host: Kim Wardlow
Guest: Amy Wilson (Safety Positive Foundation)
Series Theme: Safety (Week 3 — Boundaries)
An Aftersight Original production

Chapter Markers
00:00 — Welcome & series setup: Safety and boundaries
02:18 — Amy’s background & the shift to psychological safety
04:37 — Biggest myth: “I’m not allowed to set boundaries”
05:43 — Defining healthy vs. unhealthy boundaries
08:09 — “Clarity is kindness” and why it matters
10:28 — Too loose vs. too rigid (and weaponized) boundaries
12:47 — Early pitfalls and the “Beetlejuice” pattern rule
15:05 — Accountability, choice, and the duty of self-advocacy
17:10 — Do blindness and vision loss change boundary work?
19:21 — Techniques to say no (and practicing it)
21:44 — When someone won’t respect your “no”
23:48 — Instrumental aggression: recognizing coercion
26:08 — First win using verbal self-advocacy
28:23 — Hardest boundary defended and healing forward
30:48 — First step this week: pick one boundary
33:10 — Rebuilding confidence & relationships after change
35:26 — Safety Positive Foundation resources & closing