Ryan Berman on Cracking Negative Self-Talk in Leadership: How Self-Doubt, Fear, and Overthinking Shape Team Culture

Episode Overview In this episode of the Breakfast Leadership Show, Michael sits down with Ryan to explore one of the most persistent and underestimated leadership challenges: negative self-talk. The conversation centers on Ryan’s newly released book on self-talk and team leadership, a seven-year project co-authored with Rhett Power and Susie Burke. What began as a belief that leaders could “defeat” negative self-talk evolved into a far more practical and honest conclusion: negative self-talk cannot be eliminated, but it can be managed. This realization shaped both the content of the book and its symbolism, including a cover that reflects the fragile, ever-present nature of our internal dialogue. For leaders navigating pressure, responsibility, and visibility, this episode reframes self-doubt not as a personal failure, but as a leadership skill gap that can be addressed with awareness and structure. Cracking Negative Self-Talk in Leadership Michael and Ryan unpack how internal dialogue directly influences leadership behavior and team culture. Leaders often assume they must project certainty at all times, but unresolved self-doubt frequently leaks into decision-making, communication, and trust. Ryan explains that the “monsters” of self-doubt live in every leader’s head. The difference between effective and ineffective leadership is not the absence of these thoughts, but the ability to recognize and manage them before they shape actions and culture. For corporate leaders, founders, and people managers, the book’s insights offer a language for understanding what is happening internally and why it matters externally. The Hidden Cost of Negative Self-Talk The discussion highlights how common negative self-talk truly is. Ryan references research suggesting the average person has roughly 6,200 thoughts per day, with the majority skewing negative. Left unchecked, these thoughts create a constant undercurrent of exhaustion, hesitation, and overthinking. Michael connects this to what he sees in burnout-driven leadership environments, where overthinking becomes normalized and decision fatigue spreads across teams. Leaders who struggle internally often unintentionally create cultures of second-guessing and fear. Recognizing negative self-talk is positioned not as self-indulgence, but as a leadership responsibility. Fear, Cognition, and Leadership Performance Fear emerges as a central theme in the conversation. Michael and Ryan explore how fear directly impairs cognitive performance, narrowing thinking, reducing creativity, and slowing decision-making. Ryan introduces the concept of “Edimentals,” a practical framework for addressing fear and negative self-talk. The process focuses on identifying the issue, understanding the internal “worry war,” and applying a three-step method: Catch the fear as it arises Confront it with clarity and logic Change the narrative before it drives behavior Rather than treating fear as weakness, both emphasize the importance of normalizing it. Leaders who acknowledge fear openly create safer, more resilient teams. Authentic Leadership in Times of Crisis Michael shares a personal story from the early days of the pandemic, when he abandoned a traditional reporting-style team meeting in favor of a human-centered conversation. Instead of metrics and updates, the focus shifted to personal challenges, uncertainty, and shared experience. That spontaneous decision became a turning point in building psychological safety and trust. The lesson was clear: authenticity in leadership is not a soft skill. It is a stabilizing force, especially during uncertainty. Leadership, Courage, and Human Connection The episode closes with a broader reflection on leadership and courage. Drawing from insights from Ryan’s podcast, The Courageous, the conversation reframes courage as honesty rather than bravado. Both agree that sustainable leadership requires balancing strategy with humanity. Taking care of people is not separate from performance; it is the foundation of it. When leaders feel safe to be real, teams perform better, communicate more clearly, and navigate pressure with greater resilience. Listeners are encouraged to explore Ryan’s work and resources for deeper guidance on courage, self-talk, and leadership under pressure. Key Takeaways Negative self-talk cannot be eliminated, but it can be managed Leaders’ internal dialogue directly shapes team culture Fear reduces cognitive performance and spreads quickly through teams Normalizing fear builds trust and psychological safety Authentic leadership strengthens performance, especially in crisis Ryan shared his work through Courageous and inviting listeners to learn more at hedamentals.com and RyanBerman.com.