Reclaiming Your Capacity with Meredith Carder

Hey Team!

Today I'm talking with Meredith Carder, author of It All Makes Sense Now. Meredith is an ADHD coach and the creator behind the popular Instagram account @hummingbird_adhd, where she focuses on neuro-affirming strategies for adults. With a background in psychology and an MBA, she brings a unique perspective on how we can bridge the gap between our high-level professional goals and the executive dysfunction that often gets in the way.

I got to meet Meredith at the 2025 ADHD Conference in Kansas City and then got to hang out with her again recently at NeuroDiversion in Austin. She's a ton of fun to talk with and while this episode had a few hurdles to get over in terms of actually recording it, was a ton of fun.

In our conversation today, we get into the concept of "Ambition vs. Capacity," that frustrating space where our big ideas don't quite match what we are actually capable of doing in the moment. We talk about why we feel so much shame over "adulting" tasks like laundry and dishes, and how changing our mental models of what an "adult" looks like can free up bandwidth for things that actually matter. We also get into Meredith's specific systems for planning her week and how she uses a "Monday Planning Meeting" to set realistic expectations before the week even starts.

If you'd life to follow along on the show notes page you can find that at HackingYourADHD.com/287

YouTube: https://tinyurl.com/y835cnrk

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/HackingYourADHD

This Episode's Top Tips

1. 1. Often, we conflate the ideas of "simple" with "easy," and because simple tasks can lack the stimulation of more complex problems, they sometimes require more deliberate strategy and support, not less.
   2. High-level ideation can be a strength, but it is separate from executive function. We must learn to reconcile our big dreams with our actual current bandwidth to avoid the cycle of "losing self-trust" when we fail to reach unrealistic goals.
   3. Being "good" at something doesn't mean you have to or even necessarily need to do it, especially if it isn't something you are particularly interested in. Selecting goals based on personal values rather than just skills helps ensure that the "20% of boring stuff" required to reach a goal doesn't outweigh the "80% of interest" that keeps us going.