Playoff football, fake ads, and the things I'm officially not buying. We talk Lamar/Burrow trade theory, why chapstick is a scam, why VR isn't cool yet, and what every playoff team needs to survive this weekend.

Back from vacation and fully in galaxy-brain mode. This week, I’m serving up blueberry pizza bagels, the death of major action franchises (thanks, Jai Courtney), and a quick thought experiment about Lamar Jackson and Joe Burrow. Stafford might have just lost his last shot at an MVP, I make my feelings about 2-point conversions very clear, and the bets… well, they’re in. No recaps, just narratives, tangents, and ideas I probably shouldn’t have recorded out loud.

Christmas Eve football thoughts, late-season story lines, teams on the brink, and a little rambling as the regular season winds down.

No analytics and no spreadsheets. Not that that's new.

A cold open on gym etiquette, an accidental impromptu Jason Statham accent during Bills/Pats, Patriots fans being the soarest losers alive, the Joe Burrow return to fun blueprint, and the Chiefs getting eliminated has left us all unsatisfied.

Weekly NFL fallout, bad impressions, and thoughts I probably should have kept to myself.

Week 14 made me laugh, smile, cry and yell. It was perfect. From the Bengals/Bills awesome snow game antics (brought to you by the Snow Guy) to the sweet, sweet downfall of the Chiefs and Ravens. this week had everything a boy could have hoped for....unless you're a Colts fan.

Week 13 gets the full Walken treatment. A shameless cold-open, a Texans/Colts recap in the weirdest voice possible, Thanksgiving leftovers, and the Panthers creeping into my brain like an intrusive thought I definitely didn't ask for.

This week on "Big Sack Weekend," Pat kicks things off with a Thanksgiving cold open that would make your aunt clutch her stuffing. Then its a full on song review of Chiefs/Colts, a brutally honest audit of the Patriots and Drake Maye, and a league-wide recap of every quarterback who took a dirt nap. it was a biblical amount of sacks. Enjoy.

An Italian tale of family leads right into a Bills - Bucs review in an accent I'm calling really bad British but could be way off.

Did Sam Darnold relapse into seeing ghosts again? We finally got to see Jameis Winston play some football this year after every other backup imaginable saw some playing time.

I map out the only acceptable path to a truly entertaining SuperBowl (well it will be for me)

It's dumb, its chaotic, its football....and might be my funniest episode yet.